Who is Your BFF Keeping Good Company Ustadh

Who is Your BFF?: Keeping Good Company

By Ustadh Usama Canon

Opening

"[Peace, mercy, and blessings of Allah be upon you.]"

"[In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.]"

"[We praise Him and seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. We seek refuge in Allah from the evil within ourselves and from the wickedness of our deeds. Whomever Allah guides, there is none to misguide him, and whomever He misguides, there is none to guide him. And I bear witness that there is no god but Allah alone, without any partners, and I bear witness that Muhammad is His servant and messenger. May Allah bless him and grant him abundant peace.]"

"[O you who have believed, fear Allah as He should be feared and do not die except as Muslims.]"

Introduction

We praise Allah and we thank Him and we seek His aid and we beg for His forgiveness. We seek refuge in Him from the bad within ourselves and from any inconsistency, wrong or error in our actions. I bear witness that there is no God but Allah and that our beloved Prophet Sayyidina Muhammad, peace be upon him, is his servant and his messenger.

May Allah bless him eternally and infinitely and constantly. Believing people, I advise myself and all of you to be mindful of Allah. For indeed Allah is with those who are mindful of Him and I pray that Allah will make me and make you from amongst the people of taqwa.

The Signs of Taqwa

Sayyidina Uthman ibn Affan is reported to have said that there are signs of taqwa. So every Jum'ah we come and we're reminded the same reminder we received the same admonition that we should be people of taqwa or piety of God consciousness and an intelligent person would want a way to gauge that. They would want a way to say I've been told this time and time again and I have attempted to realize this time and time again so what are some signs I can use or some gauge that I can use to measure the extent to which I have realized this idea of taqwa or piety.

First Sign: The Company You Keep

And the first thing he says is that a person of taqwa, a person of true God consciousness does not sit with somebody except for some a person who is concerned about the affair of religion and somebody who has control over their desires and over their tongue.

Prophetic Guidance on Companionship

The Prophet, peace be upon him, is reported to have said:

(Sahih al-Bukhari and Muslim)

"A person is on the religion of their companion. So let each of you consider who they keep company with."

Another saying states: (مَعَ مَنْ تَكُنْ عَلَى حَالَتِهِ تَكُنْ - "Whoever you're with, you will be in that person's state.")

So when the Prophet says you are the religion of your companion literally you're on the way of your companion that means that your religious matters, your worldly affairs, your personal, psycho, emotional, social well-being is going to depend primarily and largely on the company that you keep. So let each of you consider well who you keep company with.

Understanding True Companionship

Naturally there are people who we spend time with or by necessity engage with that we would not consider our companions. People who are going to be casual associates, people who may be colleagues, neighbors, etc. People who are peers at school that we wouldn't apply the standard to.

We wouldn't say that oh if the company isn't full of really righteous people I'm quitting. Or if the school isn't full of completely righteous people I'm dropping out of school. That would obviously be erroneous.

What's being talked about here is suhbah. Who you keep company with. Who are the people that you spend one, a lot of time with and two who you spend meaningful time with.

The people who you are with most often. And in that regard Ibn Ata'illah tells us:

"Do not keep company with somebody whose state does not elevate you and whose speech does not guide you to God."

In other words when you're around them they lift you up. They make you feel closer to Allah. They make you want to do better things. Just their state. Before they say anything. Makes you want to do better. It wakes you up.

And you've all been around people like this. You're around certain people you say why was it easier to get up and pray? Why was it easier to avoid that which is prohibited? Because you were around a person whose state elevated you. And their speech does not guide you to God.

So this is one of the ways we can measure the first sign. The people that we keep company with.

The Reality of Modern Friendship

How do we feel when we're around them? If we feel that we get dragged down when we spend extended time with people then we should consider that. And this is very important especially for young people to you know to say that BFF the person was my best friend forever. Granted I just met them last week but all of a sudden they're my best friend forever.

Until Monday. Friendship has become cheap nowadays. It's become something that people take lightly.

But for us as Muslims it's a very serious thing. It's a very weighty thing. And so if you say that a person is your friend and because you called them your BFF best friend forever.

It doesn't matter what they do. You're ride or die. I'm gonna go out with them no matter what.

Even if they're gonna do something really stupid that could cost me my life. Like they say we're best friends. We're good friends.

If you cry I cry. If you laugh I laugh. If you're happy I'm happy. If you're sad I'm sad. But if you jump off a cliff I'm gonna miss you. Because what? I'm not gonna say oh ride or die.

He's the one who jumped off the cliff. Tell him we'll pray for you. As-salamu alaykum. He jumped off the cliff. No one told you how to jump off the cliff with them. And what do you have to prove?

A Cautionary Story

And it's one thing to say that you're down for your friends. That you like to be supportive of your friends. It's another thing to say that you would be willing to be dragged into destruction for the sake of someone who you said was your friend. And I remember when I worked in a prison not far from here as a chaplain.

There was a young boy about 19 years old from a Muslim family. Born Muslim and was a good boy. And I thought to myself what are you doing in prison? Why are you here? And he said do you want to know the real story? I said yes.

He said I had a night shift at the company I worked at and a friend of mine asked me to give him a ride home. So I went and picked up this guy after work to give him a ride home. And the police pulled us over.

And when the police pulled us over he had a firearm on him. He had a gun on him. And he put it under the seat.

And when the police searched the car they found the gun. And then he said that the gun was mine. And that gun had been used in a robbery and had been used to kill somebody.

And his friend said that it was his gun. So this young boy spends nine years in prison just because he wanted to give his friend a ride home. So one little decision.

If you're around the wrong people it can make or break you. The right decision can also make you. If you're around the right people in the right place at the right time it can mean everything for you.

The Companions' Example

And if you think about it how did the companions, may Allah be pleased with them, attain the great station that they attained besides the fact that they were graced to be companions of in the company of Sayyidina Rasulullah Muhammad, peace be upon him.

So we should choose our friends wisely. And he says if you do not keep company with someone except someone who's concerned about the matter of religion and a person who has control over their tongue and over their heart.

Second Sign: Viewing Fortune as a Trial

The second thing he said about a person of taqwa, a sign of a person of piety, is that if a great fortune befalls him from the dunya, he or she deems that a trial.

In other words if they get increase in worldly matters, if they get more money or they get the job that they had been seeking or any number of things that you can apply those two by analogy, an increase in worldly matters they see that as a trial. People tend to think the opposite. God must love me because I'm getting all of this really good stuff.

I'm too blessed to be stressed and too anointed to be disappointed. Everything's fine. Peachy keen, why? Because I've got a lot of increase.

But a person of taqwa, if they get an increase in worldly matters, they deem that as a trial. And what does Allah say?

Quranic Guidance on Testing Through Fortune

"As for the human being, when his Lord tries him by treating him with honor and making him lead an easy life, he says, 'My Lord has honored me.'"

"But if he tries him differently and he limits or strains to him his means of sustenance, he says, 'My Lord has disgraced me.'" Quran 89:15-16

So in other words, what Allah is talking about here is a human tendency for people to say, if I'm getting increase in good, my Lord is honoring me.

But he calls that ibtila. He calls it a trial or if the provision has been limited it has been strained for them that's also empty trial and the human being tends to say oh my lord is disgracing me so for all of us who are seeking success we're not people who were to be seeking failure we're seeking success and we have aspirations and we have ambitions and we have goals and we should work to fulfill them but when the fortune comes we see that also as a trial and why is it a trial because we have to be thankful for the good that we have been given and that's why Imam Ali said how wretched wealth is Halal permissible wealth is something you're going to be accounted for so all of the good that we have all of the wealth that we have it's a he said we'll be asked about how we spent it where did we get it from where we attach to it well how long ago he called and impermissible wealth is something that we would be punished for so it's a trial and one has to ask himself what did I do to gain this new fortune what did I do to gain this new good and to see it as a trial and this is really really important especially as we sit here in at least relative safety and at least relative luxury compared to many of our own community members not only globally but nationally and sometimes even locally when we are enjoying by the grace of Allah abundant good and other people are suffering well do we think that we're somehow chosen people do we think that we're somehow better than they are or do we see that we are being tested through ease while other people are being tested through difficulty and remember the example of the companions when they would have good times they would be worried when things are going easy they would be worried because they know that that inevitably will be followed by what difficulty and whenever having difficulty they would find ease they would find rest they would be at ease because they knew that that would inevitably be followed by good times.

Third Sign: Clinging to Religious Practices

The third sign he says is that if he or she finds a practice to be from the deen to be from the religion they cling to it even if it may seem insignificant if they find out about something it's that the Prophet, peace be upon him, it's from the prophets example it's from the way of the righteous people that they cling to that even if it seems insignificant and there's really two points I'd like to reflect on here.

Importance of Small Practices

The first one is this as Muslims we have a lot of things that we do that if you don't know any better it could seem insignificant outwardly so as we came here today we entered the mosque inshallah with our right foot and we're going to leave inshallah with our left foot and that's something that most people are mindful of unless of course you're trying to Instagram your foot as it enters the masjid so you can get people to like or take a vine of yourself getting ready to enter the mosque and go to pray Friday prayer snapchat that's obviously you may forget that that you're entering the house of Allah but most people are going to be mindful of the fact that you come in with your right foot and you go out with your left

foot do we hold on to that or do we take the attitude toward the deen to say oh it's just Sunnah the early Muslims and the lovers would never say something like it's just Sunnah they would say what it's Sunnah I might not be able to fulfill that thing but the fact that the beloved did it, peace be upon him, means it's an honorable thing.

Story of the Sudanese Man

And you've heard the story of the Sudanese man who would be offered watermelon at parties he'd be at a wedding and they'd offer him watermelon he'd say no I don't like watermelon and next time he'd be at another gathering and offer him watermelon and he'd say no thank you and then one day they saw him sitting there eating watermelon to his fill and he's got seeds everywhere and watermelon rinds and they came to him and they said I thought you didn't like watermelon he said to be honest with you I didn't but then I heard that the Prophet liked it, peace be upon him, and I did not want to dislike something that the Prophet liked, peace be upon him.

The point isn't that we all go out and eat watermelon that's not the point the point is that if something is a practice from the practice of the deen we cling to it even if we deem it insignificant because in reality it's not insignificant.

A Scholar's Dedication

And remember one of them came to the door of the masjid and he walked in accidentally with his left foot and then he said woe unto you speaking to himself he said woe unto you would you come into God's house come into the house of Allah and you're heedless I swear that I will fast a year as an expiation to repent from entering the masjid with my left foot now again if we forgot to do that today it doesn't mean that you have to fast a year an expiation but the point is if you hold fast to something because it's from the religion that's a sign of taqwa and this has very serious implications as it pertains to the preservation of Islam as a community for the Muslim community.

Preserving Islamic Practices Through Culture

I was once with a student and they covered there we were sitting in the courtyard of the the front of the school this is a Muslim school and they covered the the the water vessel the cup with the pen and I said to the young lady why did you do that she said oh it's just Bosnian culture and I said to her it's actually not just Bosnian culture it's a sunnah of the Prophet that you should cover up a water vessel if you have a glass or a cup you should cover up she said oh I didn't know that what's the point the culture had adapted something that was part of the practice of Rasulullah Sayyidina Muhammad, peace be upon him, and it became the default cultural norm so that Islam becomes a healthy practice now obviously we have to have knowledge to differentiate between those things that are just made up of those things that are authentically from the religion may Allah make that easy for us.

Finding Meaning in Small Things

The second point here is that if we give meaning to something that seems insignificant to us outwardly that enables us to be able to see broader meaning in society. Twenty seven percent of college-age male American students say they believe that life is nothing more than a meaningless existential hell that life is nothing more than a meaningless existential hell in other words it's all pointless it's all meaningless it doesn't mean anything what's the big deal you only live once and this is what leads to phenomenon like the knockout game I'm sure that you guys have heard about the knockout game people walking down the street knocking people out one one blow KO throughout different American cities you can google search it but don't do it till after 2 o'clock obviously the knockout game people walking up on the street and hitting people has knocked him out as a game old men young men old women young women and it's become a popular thing amongst you let's just see we can knock a person out one lady had a gun and shot the kid when he came to do it how could you you know and people used to do that thing but they were at least trying to rob somebody or there was a point not that that's a good thing there was a point to it now there's not people out to hit him in the face and this leads to ultimately people being willing to kill to take human life with no justification whatsoever and isn't this what the Prophet, peace be upon him, told us that at the end of time killing would become so prevalent that the person killing doesn't know why they killed and the person who was killed doesn't know why they were killed because we begin to see things as meaningless.

Developing Dedication Through Practice

So time is back into our practices Muslims and when we give meaning to even the simplest things it enables us to be people who preserve meaning in the broader elements of life I remember what sitting with the teacher of mine in Egypt and it was we were up late there was a group of students with the shaykh up late and all of a sudden we heard the dawn call the dawn adhan adhan of fajr the call to prayer for salatul subh and the shaykh as he sat there he said (أستغفر الله العظيم إنا لله وإنا إليه راجعون لا حول ولا قوة إلا بالله - astaghfirullah al adheem inna lillahi wa inna ilayhi rajool la hawla wa la quwwata illa billah) and we're thinking what why that's not the prayer you say after the adhan why are you so someone said to him shaykh why are you saying all of those prayers he said I forgot to pray witr I forgot to pray what witr he heard the fajr and he almost wept because he forgot to pray witr he had a more exaggerated visceral reaction to missing witr than one of us may have to missing fajr, dhuhr, asr, maghrib and isha as if somebody told him a loved one died because he forgot to pray witr and this is what good practice develops in us it develops in us a dedication and this is why the companions may Allah be pleased with them if they took on a sunnah of the Prophet, peace be upon him, they did so and they intended to do that until they died they didn't just take on a bunch of stuff and then leave it and then take it on and leave it when they adopted a prophetic practice they did so and attempted to die practicing it may Allah make it easy for us.

Fourth Sign: Caution in Eating

The fourth sign of a person of taqwa is that he or she would avoid filling their stomach with that which is halal out of fear that the haram may be mixed with it in other words they would avoid overeating food that is permissible they would avoid engaging even in food that is permissible out of fear that that thing may be mixed with haram.

Story of Imam Ahmad and Imam ash-Shafi'i

Imam Ahmed ibn Hanbal and Imam ash-Shafi'i were contemporaries and they benefited greatly from one another's company and Imam ash-Shafi'i once came to visit Imam Ahmed ibn Hanbal and he served dinner and Imam ash-Shafi'i ate well he ate his fill and then after dinner he went to rest and he slept the entire night and Imam Ahmed's daughter was shocked by that she said you're always talking about the greatness of this man Muhammad ibn Idrees ash-Shafi'i and I noticed that when he came to your house he ate like normal people eat he didn't avoid the food he wasn't he didn't he ate his food and then when he went into the room he slept the entire night he didn't wake up for tahajjud or wake up early for night prayer.

So Imam Ahmed after he heard his daughter make this complaint and this is why you have to be careful when you judge people you don't know what's going on so he goes to Imam ash-Shafi'i and he said my daughter took issue with the fact that you ate your fill at dinner and then you slept all that long he said actually the reason I ate as much as I did at your table is because you're one of the only people whose judgment I trust as it pertains to bringing permissible food because I knew your food was permissible I knew that the food you had was halal I ate my fill he said okay what about the not praying night prayer he said actually I lay I laid in bed thinking about a particular ruling of Islamic law all night long and my mind was preoccupied all night long and that's why I didn't get up to pray night prayer.

So this is someone who if we looked at him you would say oh he was just eating and sleeping but in reality he had intentionality when he ate and when he went into his room he was busy thinking about a ruling all night long.

Story of the Scholar and the Lion

And you heard the story of the man a scholar who spoke truth to power he spoke against the power structure of his time the ruler and so the ruler said he had to be executed they were going to kill him and how are they going to do that by bringing a hungry lion and feeding him to the lion in front of the whole court they used to be really brutal they're still brutal now they just have other ways of doing you sometimes they're just brutal but he so he brings the cage and the lions in the cage and it's been starved for days and now the scholar is brought and he's supposed to be eaten by this lion in front of everybody so they open the cage and push the scholar into the cage and when they come the lion lies down he doesn't attack the scholar but just before he lied down they said that the scholar started to become pale

it was profusely sweaty and the king seeing the lion unwilling to eat the man he said let him go because why isn't the lion eating and he started so he let him go.

The reason the lion wasn't eating him is as they say (مَنْ خَافَ اللَّهَ خَافَ مِنْهُ كُلُّ شَيْءٍ - man khafa Allaha khafa minhu kullu shay') - whoever is fearful of Allah, everything fears that person. So as they left the room the students said to the scholar why were you sweating and why were you turning pale we weren't used to you becoming afraid he said by Allah I wasn't afraid of being eaten they said then why were you sweating he said I forgot the ruling of lion saliva and whether or not it was najis whether or not was impure and I was sweating because I didn't want to die and have an impurity on my body I didn't want to die with a najis on my body and I was worried I forgot was the thing pure or impure so naturally Allah makes the lion not attacking because of his level of dedication may Allah make it easy for us.

Fifth Sign: Humility Before Allah

The fifth sign which we'll talk about after the break inshallah - Sayyidina Uthman said that the fifth sign of a person of Taqwa is that this person supposes that if all of the people were to be saved he would be the only one who would perish if everybody was to be saved he would be the only one who would perish.

This is a very very powerful and very very significant element of Islam's understanding and the Muslims lens through how they should view the world. A very similar statement is attributed to Sayyidina Umar who is reported to have said that if it was called on the day of judgment everybody will enter the garden except for one person I would fear that I would be that person.

And you've got to wonder what would lead somebody who gave half of what they own for the cause of Allah somebody who the Prophet, peace be upon him, reported to have said if there was a prophet after me it would have been Umar somebody who the Prophet said that when Umar takes a roadway, Shaytan takes a different one etc etc what would lead somebody who he knew the Prophet said these things none of us here not a single one of us has a Hadith about them some people think they do but they don't none of us has a Hadith about them the Prophet, peace be upon him, didn't mention me by name or mention you by name he mentioned Sayyidina Umar by name and he still says what I fear that upon the day of judgment it was said everybody was going to go to Jannah.

Now do you think Sayyidina Umar is confused about who's going to be there on the day of judgment he knows that he doesn't just mean the people from his age who is going to be there on the day of judgment everybody from all times anywhere and I still think that if everybody was going to go to paradise and it was only one person in the whole creation ever who was going to be damned it would be me what happened to their hearts what happened to them to be able to see the world that way but he also said something else and if it was called on the day of judgment that everybody was going to go to the fire except for one person I would hope that person was me.

That's called sincerity with God that's called sincerity with Allah I want to go to Jannah I really hope I do but I haven't done anything to deserve it I haven't done anything to deserve it I don't want to go to the fire may Allah save us all from the fire.

Closing

And this is what happened to their hearts what happened to them to be able to see the world that way. You never stop being a convert the sahaba never stop being converts they were people who embraced Islam from a different faith, that reality never goes away, they may establish Iman as a reality in themselves between them and Allah to where they go from just being Muslim to being mu'min, that's what many of the sahaba did obviously.

May Allah make it easy for all of us.

Note: This khutbah discusses five signs of taqwa (God-consciousness) as outlined by Sayyidina Uthman ibn Affan: keeping good company, viewing worldly fortune as a trial, clinging to religious practices regardless of how small, being cautious even with permissible food, and maintaining humility before Allah.