The Power of Forgiveness

The Power of Forgiveness

Shaykh Sulaiman Moola | Pearls of Faith

Opening of the Khutbah

السَّلَامُ عَلَيْكُمْ وَرَحْمَةُ اللَّهِ وَبَرَكَاتُهُ

بِسْمِ اللَّهِ الرَّحْمَنِ الرَّحِيمِ

In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful. All praise is due to Allah, the All-Knowing, the All-Aware, the One Who perfected the system of the world without any hinderer or helper. Glory be to Allah, whose wisdom is vast and His knowledge is abundant, and His blessings are continuous to all, young and old.

We bear witness that there is no god but Allah, with no partner in His creation. We bear witness that our Master and Protector is Muhammad, His servant and Messenger, who guided us with an enlightening Book, and invited us to Allah by warning and glad tidings. May Allah's peace and blessings be upon him, his family and his companions, as long as the planets move.

Opening Quranic Verse

Allah the Almighty said in the Glorious Quran and the Praiseworthy Quran:

"Take what is given freely, enjoin what is good, and turn away from the ignorant."

Reference: Surah Al-A'raf 7:199

Opening Hadith

The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said:

(Source Name)

"There is no decrease in wealth from giving charity, and Allah does not increase a servant in forgiveness except in honor, and no one humbles himself before Allah except that Allah raises him up."

Reference: Sahih Muslim, Hadith 2588

Introduction: The Power of Forgiveness

As the Honorable MC had introduced the topic today, it's the power of forgiveness. Someone said in the English language: "Life is so short, there isn't enough time to love, I don't know where people find time to hate."

There isn't enough time to write and type a message, to thank, to appreciate, to congratulate, to reciprocate, and yet some people can find the time to pen out, to word out, a nasty, insulting, condescending, negative message and send it out.

The Example of Imam Al-Shafi'i

Muhammad bin Idrees Al-Shafi'i, may Allah have mercy upon him, used to say:

"Whoever wrongs me or owes me a debt, I have freed him from it, as a token of my gratitude to Allah for what He has bestowed upon me."

Then he goes on to say in the second stanza, and that's the climax of the two poems:

"I do not want to arrive before Allah on the day of Qiyamah to discover that someone's entry into paradise is pending because I have not forgiven him."

We are brazen and bold to say that due to my lack of forgiveness, you will not enter Jannah. And he's like, I don't want that.

The Example of Prophet Yusuf

When Yusuf pardoned his brothers, he said: "I have pardoned you, may Allah pardon you."

"No blame will there be upon you today. May Allah forgive you; and He is the most merciful of the merciful."

Reference: Surah Yusuf 12:92

From my side, it's done, and my hope is may Allah pardon you. Some of us get so ugly, so personal: "I don't forgive you, and you can dream about Allah forgiving you."

Even if the man, you know in English they say, forgive the next person. He might not deserve the pardon, but you deserve the peace. He might not deserve the pardon, but you deserve the peace.

Advice on Forgiveness

Abdus Samad said, Fudayl ibn Ayyad used to say:

"If a person comes to you and says, so and so has hurt me, he's inflicted pain upon me, then say to him, brother forgive and move on, just move on, flush it out, don't hold it."

You know, I often give this analogy: if I hold this phone in my hand, right? And I'm not even talking about the radiation and those negative things, that's a separate topic altogether. But say if I'm holding this, it's fairly light, it's not heavy. But the longer I hold, the heavier it becomes. So the weight remains the same, but the duration increases the intensity.

Take a simple glass and hold it, it's light, it's easy, but after a few minutes my hands will start dropping down because the weight is too much to hold longer. How long will we hold grudges in our heart? And that creates a negative impact on us. It's tiring, it's burning down upon us. Forgive him.

If the person responds by saying: "Well, the nature of the crime is unpardonable, and I cannot forgive him," then say: "Okay, look, Islam has legislated for you that it's within your prerogative and right to take retaliation, provided you do not overstep the mark. And it's more likely that when you retort and respond and retaliate, you're going to exceed the limit."

And remember, as soon as you exceed the limit, the help of Allah now moves to that person because now you've become an oppressor and you're no longer the victim. People don't realize this. So somebody has hit you, Allah's help is with you. When you respond, if you go beyond the mark of what was inflicted upon you, now the help of Allah has moved away from you to him because now he is the victim and you're the oppressor.

And then he said:

"The man and the individual who masters the courage to forgive, he can sigh with relief and he or she can sleep peacefully by night. But the one who orchestrates, who plans, who tries to take revenge, he tosses by night. He's turning this way to that side."

He's just restless, he's uneasy, he's anxious.

The Reality of Human Relations

As humans, we're bound to hurt one another. So I often say to couples that when you get married, you plan this ideal life. And I say, don't plan that, you know what, "I want to be in a relationship where we don't have a difference, where we don't have an argument." Because that's not expected, nor is it possible.

Simply because the Prophet ﷺ is the paragon of Allah's creation, the noblest of His creation, and there were a fair share of difference of opinion and some discord between him and his honorable spouses and consorts. But what we need to develop is the maturity with which he would diffuse the situation.

The Prophet's Example with His Wives

So there is this occasion where the noble consorts of the Messenger ﷺ had asked him for some material things. Some requested better curtains, better furniture, better items, etc. And he was disturbed and perturbed by this request, being: "My spouse and my consort, I would have expected better from you."

And then he said:

"I'm going to excuse myself for a month, a lunar month."

After which the verses were revealed:

"O Prophet, say to your wives, 'If you should desire the worldly life and its adornment, then come, I will provide for you and give you a gracious release. But if you should desire Allah and His Messenger and the home of the Hereafter - then indeed, Allah has prepared for the doers of good among you a great reward.'"

Reference: Surah Al-Ahzab 33:28-29

Be it as it may, in which they were given the choice that if you want the material mundane things, Allah will give it to you and the Prophet of Allah will release you. And if you want Allah and His Messenger, then be satisfied with what has been given to you in a paraphrased translation of that.

The Return After 29 Days

So the Prophet ﷺ returned after 29 days. Our mother Aisha, may Allah be pleased with her - and I get very emotional because I speak clearly and we make no bones about it. We are proud of the Prophet 's marriage to Khadija, may Allah be pleased with her, and with the same degree of pride, we are proud of his marriage to Aisha, may Allah be pleased with her.

When a person doesn't believe in the Prophet and he harbors negativity against the Messenger's Nikah to Aisha, may Allah be pleased with her, tough luck, so be it. But when a believer who claims that Muhammad ﷺ was the greatest human and rightfully so, and he or she has reservation in their heart regarding the marriage of the Prophet ﷺ to Aisha, may Allah be pleased with her, then I'm afraid, that's the departure of faith from that person. May Allah protect us.

"But no, by your Lord, they will not [truly] believe until they make you judge concerning that over which they dispute among themselves and then find within themselves no discomfort from what you have judged and submit in [full, willing] submission."

Reference: Surah An-Nisa 4:65

Three Advisors at the Prophet's Masjid

I was doing my Umrah during Hajj this year and we did our farewell Salam and I was coming out, myself and my wife, and we were taking a flight to Jeddah. And then a brother from America, Shaykh Tariq - I shared platform with him in a conference in UK - he was with a group and he said: "Oh Shaykh Sulaiman!" And I said yes, and we recognized and we came forward and we embraced each other.

He stopped his group outside and he said: "You got to listen to the Shaykh, you got to listen to him." And Al-Baqi is on our left, the Green Dome is on our right, the Prophet's Sacred Masjid is here, it's just early morning, I'm emotional, we just conveyed our Salam and we're leaving, and they implored me to share some advice.

And I gave them three advisors and I have a flash of it so I'm going to share it with you.

First Advisor: Study the Life of the Prophet

I said to them: Number one, make a concerted effort to study the life of the Prophet ﷺ.

Yusuf An-Nabhani, may Allah have mercy upon him, writes in his book Sayyid Al-Aalameen:

"Anyone who studies the movement of the Prophet and how he molded the Arab who were hostile, who were aggressive, who were obstinate, who were stubborn by their nature and their temperament, to the point that they could leave their native land and relocate in his love, in his passion, in his obedience, in his compliance - without him studying the movement of anyone who preceded him - will be compelled to concede that he is the most intelligent human that inhabited the earth."

So I implore you as well, my sister and my brother, take a passion to study the life of Muhammad, understand it.

Second Advisor: No Reservation Toward Any Aspect of the Prophet's Life

Number two, let there not be reservation in your heart or your mind towards any action or any marriage or any aspect of the life of the Prophet. Do not become a victim of negative propaganda. Study it objectively and holistically.

The Example of Safiyyah

What kind of respect he showed Safiyyah, may Allah be pleased with her - she did not come from an Arab background. She was the spouse of the Prophet who was the daughter of Huyay ibn Akhtab, while Hafsa was the daughter of Umar ibn Al-Khattab. They got into a discussion and so Umar ibn Al-Khattab's daughter Hafsa said: "My father was Umar, the legend, the giant, the stalwart. Your dad was Huyay ibn Akhtab."

Huyay ibn Akhtab was not a believer and it left Safiyyah, may Allah be pleased with her, uneasy. So what did the Prophet of Allah come and say? He said: "Fear Allah and don't say distasteful things."

And then he said: "Safiyyah, your father - because she came from the lineage of Harun - your father Harun was a Prophet, your uncle Musa was a Prophet, your husband Muhammad is a Prophet. So who has the right to argue against you that they have more privilege above you?"

Wow! See the honor and the respect and the regard he gave. When he married Safiyyah, may Allah be pleased with her, he had selected her from the spoils that had come his way.

The Couplets About Aisha

In an environment where there was no regard given to women, a companion comes to the Prophet and says: "Who do you love the most?"

And he said: "Aisha."

The scholars say number one, the reason that motivated the questioner to pose the question was his notion that he was the most beloved. So that was the amazing charisma of the Prophet that he loved everyone so dearly that each one believed: "I was the most beloved."

I mean, I have four kids and you know how as a dad - "that's your favorite," "yeah there's your favorite coming," "there's your favorite" - and then you're telling the wife "that's your favorite" and she's telling you "that's your favorite" and we know this goes back and forth with kids, right?

And the Prophet could - and with teacher and students it's so challenging because if you acknowledge one, the other one feels insensitive about it or he feels uneasy about it - and the Prophet of Allah could leave each one believing that he was the most dear.

The Prophet said: "I love Aisha."

And then the questioner said: "No, I'm asking from the men, who do you love the most?"

And he didn't say Abu Bakr, he said: "Abuha" - her father, her father. He used the feminine and recognized her. He paid tribute, he paid homage, he gave recognition to a woman.

The Month is 29 Days

Long story short, the Prophet comes home after 29 days. Aisha says: "You swore to us that you will not enter for a month and we have reached only 29 nights."

The only time that couple was smiling when they took that shot and that image - in real life that couple is not smiling, I promise you. There is a breakdown in that very marriage which looks so amazing: a broad smile with a stroller in the mall, you know, holding hands and it's so lovey-dovey, hunky-dory. No, no, go there, there is nothing, there is nothing happening.

So what did the Prophet say? He said: "Aisha, I didn't say thirty, I said a month, and this month is 29 days, this month is 29 days." And done.

Anyway, so I was saying to you that the person who can forgive, he sleeps peacefully, and the one who harbors resentment in his heart, he is restless by night. And you know the negative energy that it creates in you, how it drains you and how it frustrates you.

Umm Habibah and Aisha Reconcile

When Umm Habibah, the honorable spouse of the Prophet, makes mention of the narration - she was in her fatal illness, she sent a message to her co-wife Aisha and she said: "We were common wives to the Prophet and we had our differences, and now I'm about to leave this world. I ask you, please forgive me, and I have forgiven you."

And Aisha teared and she said: "I have forgiven you, may Allah forgive you."

She then sent a similar message to Umm Salma, and each one of them mutually forgave each other.

As humans, we are social creatures. No human is an island. We co-exist, and in our co-existence we are bound to say things that are going to hurt each other. That's the nature of life. It doesn't mean if we forgive today we will not be hurting tomorrow. That's how life continues.

The Story of Habil and Qabil

The ancient story of our brothers, the first children of the ancestor of mankind, that is Habil and Qabil - we all know the painful story of where one brother plots against the other brother over jealousy, that one is blessed with a woman more beautiful than the other.

"If you should raise your hand against me to kill me - I shall not raise my hand against you to kill you. Indeed, I fear Allah, Lord of the worlds."

But I'm not going to stoop so low and reciprocate the same behavior. I'm going to rise one above. I'm going to go one above. I'm not going to do the same thing.

So the brother could not accept that his brother has something greater and better, and that is what jealousy is.

The Nature of Jealousy

Imam Ghazali writes in one place so amazingly, he says: If miserliness and withholding is bad, then jealousy is ten times more severe than miserliness, because:

الْبَخِيلُ يَبْخَلُ بِمَا فِي يَدَيْهِ وَالْحَاسِدُ يَبْخَلُ بِمَا فِي يَدَيْ اللَّهِ بِمَا فِي خَزَائِنِ اللَّهِ

"A miser doesn't want to part with what he has, while a jealous person doesn't want others to have what belongs to Allah."

So he cannot digest the fact that Allah is giving someone else something, and he has difficulty with that.

So anyway, the brother who harbors the jealousy says to his brother: "You know whatلأقتلك - you're provoking me and I cannot accept this and I will even slay you."

So Habil responds to the provocation of his brother by saying: "لَئِنْ بَسَطْتَ إِلَيَّ يَدَكَ لِتَقْتُلَنِي مَا أَنَا بِبَاسِطِ يَدِيَ إِلَيْكَ لِأَقْتُلَكَ" - Listen my brother, if that's what you're throwing at me, I'm not going to do the same. I'm going to rise. I'm going to be one above, I'm going to be one better.

The First to Embrace Forgiveness: Uthman ibn Affan

And Ayub As-Sakhtiyani has made mention - his quotation is mentioned in Ibn Kathir under this ayah - and that's what I actually wanted to focus on. He said: The first person who took to the sentiments of pardon and to

move on and not to stagnate and not to harbor resentment in this Ummah from this lesson was Uthman ibn Affan, may Allah be pleased with him.

Remember when he was in his house in Medina and the rebels had surrounded his house. "I see that death has come close and it doesn't spare anyone. I can see death coming and death will not spare any person."

Abdullah ibn Salam gave the historical sermon outside the house trying to ward off the rebels and saying to them: "When the life of a prophet is claimed, minimum 70,000 lives will be lost. And when you lay your hands on the successor of a prophet, then minimum 35,000 lives will be lost. So back off."

He says: "I was standing when Sayyidina Uthman was surrounded. People had plotted his assassination. From inside I could hear him saying:

اللَّهُمَّ اجْمَعْ أُمَّةَ مُحَمَّدٍ اللَّهُمَّ اجْمَعْ أُمَّةَ مُحَمَّدٍ

"O Allah, unite the Ummah of Muhammad. O Allah, unite the Ummah of Muhammad."

"Oh Allah, unite them. Allah, unite them. Allah, grant them unity. Allah, save them from dissension and division."

اللَّهُمَّ إِنِّي أَسْتَعْدِيكَ عَلَيْهِمْ اللَّهُمَّ إِنِّي أَسْتَعْدِيكَ عَلَيْهِمْ وَأَسْتَعِينُكَ عَلَى جَمِيعِ أُمُورِي وَأَسْأَلُكَ صَبْرًا عَلَى مَا ابْتَلَيْتَنِي

"Allah, You are my defense. Oh Allah, I ask You to aid me and grant me strength in this challenging situation."

You can imagine - he was denied to drink water from the very water which he purchased and made available. Understand how challenging it was. It's beyond comprehension, right?

The Well of Uthman

When the Prophet came to Medina and the people of Medina needed water, and there was this well, there was a person from the Banu Ghaffar tribe. He had this well. And the Prophet said: "Sell me this well and I'll give you one in paradise."

And he said: "لا أَسْتَطِيعُ - I will not be able to. It's for my family and my kids, etc."

فَبَلَغَ ذَلِكَ عُثْمَانَ

And the news reached Sayyidina Uthman, and he came to the Prophet:

أَتَجْعَلُ لِي مِثْلَ مَا جَعَلْتَ لَهُ إِنِ اشْتَرَيْتُهَا؟

"Oh Prophet of Allah, is the deal on for me as well? If I buy it, will you give me one in paradise?"

He says: "Of course."

فَاشْتَرَاهَا عُثْمَانُ بِخَمْسَةٍ وَثَلَاثِينَ أَلْفَ دِرْهَمٍ

Sayyidina Uthman then purchased it for 35,000 dirhams and gave it in charity.

And years later, things come and degenerate to a point that the very Uthman in his own house and compound is locked down under a curfew and is asking for water from the very well which he donated, and he's denied.

The Patience of Uthman

Hammad ibn Zaid said:

رَحِمَ اللَّهُ أَمِيرَ الْمُؤْمِنِينَ حُصِرَ نَيَفًا وَأَرْبَعِينَ لَيْلَةً لَمْ تَبْدُ مِنْهُ كَلِمَةٌ يَكُونُ لِمُبْتَدِعِينَ

"May Allah's mercy be on Uthman ibn Affan. He was kept under house arrest for more than 40 days. In that 40 days, he didn't lose his composure even once that he slipped up or uttered something that people can latch on to and legitimize and justify that at a moment of argument or hostility you can say this or behave like this."

In all the intensity of whatever was mounting against him, despite the challenges, he maintained his calmness, his composure, his balance. He didn't utter anything despite the pressure against him.

رَحِمَ اللَّهُ أَمِيرَ الْمُؤْمِنِينَ حُصِرَ نَيِّفًا وَأَرْبَعِينَ لَيْلَةً

Hasan ibn Ali Seeks Reconciliation

Abu Qatada Al-Ansari said: "I went to the compound. نَسْتَأْذِنُهُ فِي الْحَقِّ - He was the Ameer."

وَالْوَيْلُ لِلرَّكْبِ الَّذِينَ سَعَوْا إِلَى عُثْمَانَ فَاجْتَمَعُوا عَلَى الْعِصْيَانِ وَالْوَيْلُ لِمَنْ قَتَلَ الْحُسَيْنَ فَإِنَّهُ قَدْ بَاعَ مِنْ مَوْلَاهُ بِالْخُسْرَانِ لَسْنَا نُكَفِّرُ مُسْلِمًا بِكَبِيرَةٍ وَاللَّهُ ذُو عَفْوِ وَذُو غُفْرَانٍ

It's a long poem. Woe be to those who advance to claim the life of Uthman ibn Affan, the only man in the annals of history who enjoys the privilege of wedding two daughters of a common prophet, and that also the greatest of prophets.

When Sayyidina Uthman got married to Ruqayya, someone said: "أَبْشِرْ وَقَدْ حُيِيتَ ثَلَاثًا وِتْرًا ثُمَّ ثَلَاثًا وَثَلَاثًا أُخْرَى ثُمَّ بِأُخْرَى لِكَيْ تُتِمَّ عَشْرًا لَقِيتَ خَيْرًا وَبُقِيتَ شَرًّا نَكَحْتَ وَاللهِ حَصَانًا زَهْرَا وَأَنْتَ بِكْرٌ وَلَقِيتَ بِكْرَا

He said: "We walked in and we said, 'Uthman, give us permission." So he said: "You can go for Hajj."

As I came out, اسْتَقْبَلَنِي الْحَسَنُ - I met Hasan, may Allah be pleased with him. And Hasan, may Allah be pleased with him, said: "Come with me back in." So I went back in.

So Hasan, may Allah be pleased with him, told Uthman: "These people are plotting against you. They're doing nasty things. مُرْنِي بِمَا شِئْتَ - Here I stand. Give me the order and the command."

So Sayyidina Uthman said:

إِنَّ الْقَوْمَ مَا يُرِيدُونَ غَيْرِي إِنَّ الْقَوْمَ مَا يُرِيدُونَ غَيْرِي

"The truth be told, they are thirsty for my neck and not for anyone else."

ARABIC TEXT (CRITICAL - PRESERVE EXACTLY)

Page 11

"By Allah, I will not risk the life of this Ummah to rescue my soul. But I will risk my life to rescue the lives of others. I will not risk the lives of others to rescue myself. But I will risk my life."

Reference: Surah Az-Zumar 39:24

So then we said to him: (إِنْ كَانَ مِنْ أَمْرِكَ كَوْنٌ - in kāna min amrika kawn) - If things pan out as they look bleak and dark and gloomy, what would you advise us?"

He said:

"Look at the thing on which the Ummah agrees with consensus, because Allah will not allow for this Ummah to unite on deviation."

We said this and we left.

The Message is to Forgive

So the message is to forgive. Make the world a better place. Just relax. Take it out. Make the environment more relaxed. Take out the hostility and the bickering and the antagonism and the unpleasantness. Just relax things.

The Story of Aws and Khazraj

There is a narration that Aws and Khazraj - we all know Aws and Khazraj had their rivalry pre-Islam. And then when the Prophet ﷺ came (أَلَّفَ بَيْنَ قُلُوبِهِمْ - allafa bayna qulūbihim) - He united them.

And the scholars tell us the ayah releases a hint that wealth cannot unite. You think if I give and I spend, it's good, it's amazing. But wealth is not adequate to unite.

Allah says that He united your companions:

"If you had spent all that is in the earth, you could not have brought their hearts together; but Allah brought them together."

Page 12

"And you were on the edge of a pit of the Fire, and He saved you from it."

You were on the edge, you were on the edge of Hell, and Allah rescued you. So the Sahaba became amazing. They were united. They had this love. They had this brotherhood. Unprecedented.

One day they were sitting:

"Sat in, casual, relaxing, and the Arab's poetry was intrinsic to them. It was intrinsic to them. It was part of their nature."

And then one person from the Aws tribe just recalled a poem in which he ridiculed the Khazraj. And then from the Khazraj, someone recalled a poem in which he ridiculed the Aws. (فَلَمْ يَزَلْ هَذَا بِبَيْتٍ وَهُدًا بِبَيْتِ - falam yazal hādhā bibaytin wahudā bibayti) - One to another, back and forth, tit for tat, sensitive that they picked up their weapons.

(جَاءَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ مُسْرِعًا وَقَدْ حُسِرَ عَنْ سَاقَيْهِ فَغَلَبَ لِذَلِكَ - jā'a rasūlu-llāhi ṣallā-llāhu ʿalayhi wa sallam musriʿan wa qad ḥusira ʿan sāqayhi faghalaba lidhālika)

Nabi heard that my Sahaba got into an argument, and what triggered it? Sometimes we sit in, it's a social gathering, we start using some humor, but in that humor we become insensitive, we offend a gender, we offend a family, we offend an individual, and something which ought to be pleasant to bond us becomes ugly and personal.

The Prophet ﷺ immediately came and he said: "What are you doing? What are you busy with?" And he said: "Stop all this, stop all this."

And immediately they realized - and Sahaba were Sahaba - they immediately would change the tune, and they would shift the tone.

They embraced one another and they made tawbah. The hadith is in Bukhari.

(Sahih Al-Bukhari, Hadith 4905)

Abdullah ibn Zubair and Aisha Reconcile

Abdullah ibn Zubair, may Allah be pleased with him, the nephew of Asma - he used to give a rich allowance to his aunt Asma, may Allah be pleased with her. He is the brother of Urwa ibn Zubair. Urwa ibn Zubair - the whole family was amazing.

Abdullah ibn Zubair gave a rich allowance, money, to his aunt Aisha, may Allah be pleased with her. But narration suggests that they did not share the same mother. Aisha and Asma, may Allah be pleased with both of

Page 13

them, were sisters - as in their father was Abu Bakr, may Allah be pleased with him - however their mother was different.

Be it as it may, Asma, may Allah be pleased with her, the wife of Zubair ibn Al-Awwam - her son was Abdullah ibn Zubair. So he used to give his aunt Aisha, may Allah be pleased with her, his maternal aunt, his mom's sister, a rich allowance. And Aisha, may Allah be pleased with her, was very generous. She used to spend a lot of money.

The hadith is in Bukhari. So one day he heard that Aisha, may Allah be pleased with her, is just spending and spending. He said: "(لَتَنْتَهِنَّ عَائِشَةُ - latantahinna ʿā'ishatu) - Well Aisha, may Allah be pleased with her, needs to go slow with spending, otherwise I'm going to limit her allowance. I'm going to limit her allowance."

So Aisha, may Allah be pleased with her said: "(أَوَقَالُ؟ - awaqālu?) - Did he really say this?"

They said: "Yes, this is what he said."

What I'm saying is: as humans, it's natural. We do slip up. We do err. We are human.

You know, in English they say: "I forgive, not because I'm weak, because I'm strong enough to understand that others make mistakes." I forgive, not because I'm weak. It's not a sign of weakness. It's because I'm strong enough to understand. That's human. Fallibility is intrinsic to our nature. We're fallible. We are fallible. This is how we've been created.

So I'm strong enough to understand: he made a mistake, she made a mistake. Let's move on. Let's move on.

So Aisha, may Allah be pleased with her, said:

"Okay, well then I swear by Allah I'm not going to be speaking to him. I will not."

When time moved on and it got long, now Abdullah ibn Zubair got disturbed. "My aunt, Aisha, is not talking to me, and it's because of what I said."

So he approached two Sahaba: Abdur Rahman ibn Al-Aswad and Miswar ibn Makhrama. And they both were from the Banu Zuhra tribe. Banu Zuhra tribe is the tribe of the Prophet's mother. Amina, may Allah be pleased with her, belonged to the Banu Zuhra.

And it's important for us to... You know, before when two people were fighting, the third one was like: "Brothers, brothers, sisters, stop." Today when two are fighting, it's like... "Welcome to the modern world." Yeah, that's how it is.

Back in the days, the third one would come and separate the two. Now it's "get it on, capture it and circulate it." And just... I say the world is on fire, man. If you come with half a glass of water, or you come with a hose, or you come with a bucket, come join us and let's extinguish and quell the fire. But for heaven's sake, don't come with a match or a lighter. There's just too much fire in the world.

Page 14

There's just too much negativity. Please, please, just stop there and there, brother or sister. If you come in with water, let's help us. Probably you and us together will get somewhere. But just don't come with another lighter or another match. There's too much.

So he approaches Miswar ibn Makhrama and Abdur Rahman ibn Aswad and he says: "Please, you people need to go to Aisha, may Allah be pleased with her, and speak to her that she needs to break her oath and I need to reconcile."

So they come to her and they say: "Can we enter?"

She says: "Yes."

So they use a very diplomatic way. They said: "Can all of us come?"

She said: "Yes." And she didn't know that Abdullah ibn Zubair was with them. She said: "Come."

So as they get in, they stay behind the veil because Aisha, may Allah be pleased with her, is the spouse of the Prophet ﷺ and there's no family tie. But Abdullah ibn Zubair could get behind the curtain because this is his aunt. (الْخَالَةُ بِمَنْزِلَةِ الْأُمِّ - al-khālatu bimanẓilati al-ummi) - The aunt is like your mother in the absence of the mother.

And he falls on her and he embraces her:

"My mother Aisha, I beg you, forgive me. My mother Aisha, I beg you, forgive me."

And they're saying: "Oh Aisha, you know better. You're the spouse of the Prophet ﷺ."

So she says:

"I have made a vow. The hadith is in Bukhari, and I know it's a strong vow."

And she cries and they cry. And in the end, she says: "I have accepted it and I have forgiven you." After all, she was the spouse of the Prophet ﷺ.

And then she liberated 40 slaves as expiation for her oath.

And whenever she used to recall this vow that she took, she used to cry until her tears would drench her entire scarf.

(Sahih Al-Bukhari, Hadith 5237)

Page 15

My message through this incident is that: go forward between the regret of yesterday and the hope of tomorrow lies the opportunity of today. Today is the time.

When you say "I will reconcile tomorrow," the devil got no issue. But when you say "I'm picking up the phone now and I'm reconciling," that's the time the devil is trembling in his boots. That's the time he's uneasy. When you say "I'm going to apologize now at this moment," that is what Allah wants us to do.

The Reconciliation of Abdullah ibn Amr and Hasan

So Al-Bazzar makes mention of the narration that Raja ibn Rabi'ah says: "We were sitting in the masjid of the Prophet ﷺ. And Abu Sa'id Al-Khudri, may Allah be pleased with him, was with us, and Abdullah ibn Amr ibn Al-Aas, may Allah be pleased with him, was with us.

Hasan ibn Ali, may Allah be pleased with him, passed by - the grandson.

What did the Prophet say?

"This son of mine is a leader, and perhaps Allah will reconcile through him between two great factions of the Muslims."

(Sahih Al-Bukhari, Hadith 2704)

So Hasan, may Allah be pleased with him, resembled the Prophet ﷺ from his head to his belly button, while Husayn, may Allah be pleased with him, resembled the Prophet ﷺ belly button going down. And Fatima, may Allah be pleased with her, walked precisely like the walk of the Prophet ﷺ. Almost like the personality of Muhammad was captured between mother and her two sons.

Sayyidina Umar, may Allah be pleased with him, during his reign, he used to give his son Abdullah ibn Umar a thousand dirhams as allowance. And he used to give Hasan, may Allah be pleased with him, and Husayn five thousand.

So Abdullah ibn Umar said: "Oh my dad, why? Islam disapproves nepotism, which I'm not asking for, political favors to family members. Islam equally opposes that you discriminate against your own family. I was a man in the active front in Islam (وَهُمَا يَلْعَبَانِ فِي طُرُقَاتِ الْمَدِينَةِ - wa humā yalʿabāni fī ṭuruqāti al-madīnah) - And Hasan and Husayn were kids playing in the streets of Madina."

And what did Sayyidina Umar say? "My son, I love you. And why would I discriminate against you? It's not you versus Hasan and Husayn. It's their mother versus your mother. For the world, with a woman like yours or

ARABIC TEXT (CRITICAL - PRESERVE EXACTLY)

Page 16

anyone, (مَا وَفَّيْنَا بِأُمِّهِمَا - mā waffaynā biʾummihimā) - Fatima, may Allah be pleased with her, was Fatima. She was the most beloved to the Prophet ﷺ. In respect and honor of their mother, that is why I give them so much."

So anyway, Hasan, may Allah be pleased with him, made salam:

السَّلَامُ عَلَيْكُمْ وَرَحْمَةُ اللَّهِ

فَرَدَّ الْقَوْمُ

Everybody said: وَعَلَيْكُمُ السَّلَامُ وَرَحْمَةُ اللَّهِ

And Abdullah ibn Amr ibn Al-Aas, after he left, he softly, discreetly said: وَعَلَيْكُمُ السَّلَامُ وَرَحْمَةُ اللهِ as Hasan, may Allah be pleased with him, walked away.

Then he said: "Must I tell you who on the earth is most beloved to Allah? From all those that inhabit the planet, must I tell you who is most beloved to Allah?"

We said: "Tell us."

He said: "Hasan, may Allah be pleased with him, who just walked by and greeted, he is the most beloved.

وَاللَّهِ مَا كَلَّمْتُهُ وَلَا كَلَّمَنِي مُنْذُ لَيَالِي صِلِّينَ

"Allah is my witness. From the battle of Siffin, from that day till this day, unfortunately myself and him haven't spoken at all."

وَلَأَنْ يَرْضَى عَنِّي

"And if somebody could negotiate and facilitate and reconcile between the two of us, that would be more dear to me than anything and everything in the world."

Now look at the beauty of Sahaba. They were humans. They had difference of opinion. It was human.

I said, this is how it is. You know this brother is saying: "Myself and my spouse, we married for 15 years. We never had an argument."

So I asked him: "You stay together or you stay separate?" He's like, "Really?" No, man. I don't envy you. Because you know life after you patch up is so exciting, right? I don't want to go into too many details and I hope I can be modest here. And I don't want to... you know what I mean? But some things get more exciting after you reconcile, right?

So you have an argument and then you reconcile and then you feel so young again. You feel so good again. You feel so well.

I always say, my analogy - because I've been dealing with marriage cases for 22 years. Not to say that I'm any expert, but the benefit I get out of it is it allows me to appreciate my own marriage all the time. And I try to help the marriages of others all the time.

Page 17

But my analogy is that the challenge in marriage is like the turbulence in a flight. Regardless of how modern the aircraft is, any flight can go into turbulent mode at any time. Hello? Hello? Can I get a thumbs up here if somebody agrees with me here?

So the flight can go into turbulent mode. Alhamdulillah, I've travelled. We've travelled in the first class. We've had showers on board. Not that you feel cleaner if you shower in the air, but whatever it is. You still have turbulence in Darajatul Ula or Darajatul Siyahiyah, wherever you are, or Darajatul Rijal Al-A'mal. That's the first thing.

The second thing is: you cannot predict the duration of turbulence. Hello? Can somebody agree with me here?

The third thing is: when the flight hits turbulence, the rules change. The rules change. Clear the aisles. Empty the lavatories. Fold the tables. And behave. You cannot be sitting and doing other things. Buckle up. We're in turbulence. Just behave.

Those are my three analogies that I always share. Probably because of aviation and travel it relates with me better, but that's how I look at it.

So I'm not saying - I'm saying it's usual. It's gonna happen. This is how Allah has created us. We have our difference of opinion, husband, wife, but the aim is to learn to forgive and to forget and to move forward and embrace each day. And that's how we will look forward to it, provided there is that broadness of shoulder and there is trust in the relation. There isn't disloyalty and infidelity and promiscuity. It's a chapter of its own. May Allah guide us.

The Apology is Accepted

So anyway, he said: "Myself and him did not share a word from the battle of Siffin. If somebody can facilitate this, then I would be the happiest man."

So what did Abu Sa'id Al-Khudri say? "Okay, then let's go and apologize." You say you wish. If you say, you know, "I'm not speaking to the sister. I really want to talk to her." "Let's go and apologize."

"No, no, no, no. Inshallah when I go for Hajj, I will ask her to forgive me. Yeah, not now."

What does the Quran say?

بَلْ يُرِيدُ الْإِنْسَانُ لِيَفْجُرَ أَمَامَهُ

"But man desires to continue in sin."

Reference: Surah Al-Qiyamah 75:5

People procrastinate in virtue not because they're not convinced about it, just because they lag in behavior. They don't have the courage to embrace change.

Page 18

So: "No, no, inshallah, one day when I get the inner calling from Allah, when I get that inner motivation, brother, oh good luck."

Who has what guarantee?

"Respond to the call of Allah and His Messenger when He invites you, and that will give you life."

Allah says لِمَا يُحْيِيكُمْ - That will give you life. Life in His obedience is life, and life without the obedience of Allah is not life.

"And let it be known to you: often between a servant and his intention there comes a blockage from Allah."

So when a noble intention comes, execute it before an impediment and an obstacle comes and separates you from the execution of that vision. So when a good intention comes, hasten in its execution, because you don't know if that good intention will come back.

So he said: "Come, let's go."

So they go, they knock on, they enter. Now can you imagine how awkward a moment is? They walk in. He says: "Can I come?"

"Yeah, come in."

And Abdullah ibn Amr ibn Al-Aas also comes, and now they sit in, and Hasan, may Allah be pleased with him, is there. Now it's a bit cold, it's a bit reserved, it's a bit uneasy, because you were not talking, you made this great generous sentiment in his absence that he's the most amazing person. Now there's this spindle of silence.

So how do we break the silence? Wow! When you have good intentions, then Allah will facilitate it.

So then Abu Sa'id Al-Khudri told Abdullah ibn Amr ibn Al-Aas:

حَدِّثْنَا بِالَّذِي حَدَّثْتَنَا حَيْثُ مَرَّ الْحَسَنُ

"Listen, when we were sitting there and Hasan, may Allah be pleased with him, passed, you were saying some very amazing things about the man. Just say it again."

He said: "Yeah, I'll say it. I said he's the most beloved to Allah. He's very amazing. Allah loves him the most."

So Hasan, may Allah be pleased with him, said:

فَلِمَ قَاتَلْتَنَا يَوْمَ صِفِّينَ؟

"Sahaba were real, man. Allah is my witness. When I study at night and I love my kitabs..."

Page 19

And this is the other issue I always tell my wife - you know, and I love her to pieces, may Allah reward her, really. She used to tell me that before I got married, every night she used to listen to my lectures in sleep. Since I'm married, she's never heard once. But anyway, that's life. I don't blame her, right? Because you get exposure to the other side of the human. But she says that when I proposed, she used to like listen to this man right through the night.

Anyway, I love her, may Allah bless her. So anyway, I love my books, and my books are out and it's sitting in my room, and every day I'm sitting and it's still late and I'm reading, and I love it. Allah knows I have no knowledge. I have no knowledge. And Allah knows I've said this and I'm saying it again.

Abdullah ibn Abbas used to say:

إِنِّي لَآتِي عَلَى الْآيَةِ فَأَوَدُّ لَوْ أَنَّ النَّاسَ جَمِيعًا عَلِمُوا مِثْلَ الَّذِي أَعْلَمُ

"I would get into a verse, get engrossed and immersed into the depth of that ayah, and my heart would scream out: 'I wish the whole world could leave what they're doing and come and join me and understand the ayah as I've understood it!' I get this ecstasy."

And I have no knowledge. I cannot begin to imagine what Sayyidina Ali got. I cannot begin. Sayyidina Abdullah ibn Abbas, I cannot begin.

What did Imam Shafi'i say? سَهْرِي لِتَنْقِيحِ الْعُلُومِ أَلَذُّ

Okay, it's going to go on long.

So anyway, I was saying to you: so I leave my books there and I love it, right? And come in the morning, it's got to be packed up and it's got to be put again. But: "Listen, my love, I'm going to be reading tomorrow morning."

"Yeah, but we need to have things in order."

"Like, okay."

So now and then she travels with me, and then you know a man in a hotel, how everything is just left by himself. So now she comes, everything in the hotel is also systematic: "Pack everything, put everything nicely in order, in discipline."

I said: "Alhamdulillah, may Allah bless her for her discipline and her system in everything."

They said: "Behind every successful man there's a woman."

So a brother said: "No, no, Shaykh, you mustn't say this, because then I'll say my girlfriend is behind me."

So you rather qualify that statement and say, you know, there's a married spouse or whatever.

"Okay, thank you, I appreciate what you say."

Anyway, where to where?

So they go and he said: "Hasan is the greatest man," may Allah be pleased with him.

Page 20

So he said: "If you say I'm the greatest, then why did you fight me in the battle of Siffin?"

Listen to this, my brothers and sisters. Wow! If we can conclude our event and conference on these final thoughts in this last incident that I have in my mind.

He said: "I didn't participate..." Now Siffin was a battle that occurred between Sahaba, and there were difference of opinion, and we respect both sides because they were all beloved to Allah and Allah pardoned them all.

He said: "I didn't come in the battle to actively fight against you, O Hasan, may Allah be pleased with him. But you know what had happened? You know what's the circumstances behind my participation?

"One day my dad had lodged a complaint to the Prophet ﷺ saying that me - that is his son - he only performs salah and he only offers prayer and he's only fasting all the time. So the Prophet said: 'Oh Abdullah, your dad is saying this. Please go slowly and you know just balance the act out and obey Amr, your dad.'

"So those words of the Prophet stuck with me. When I came to the battle of Siffin, my dad said: 'Join.'

"So because the Prophet of Allah had impressed upon me to obey, I obliged.

وَاللَّهِ أَتَيْتُ فِي الْمَعْرَكَةِ امْتِثَالًا لِأَمْرِ أَبِي وَلَكِنِّي لَمْ أُضِفْ إِلَى أَعْدَادِهِمْ لِأَنِّي عَلِمْتُ أَنَّ هُنَاكَ صَحَابَةً عَلَى الْجَانِبَيْنِ فَأَبْقَيْتُ نَفْسِي مُنْخَفِضًا مُتَخَفِّيًا وَمُتَنَكِرًا لَمْ أُضِفْ إِلَى أَعْدَادِهِمْ وَلَمْ أُطْلِقْ سَهْمًا وَلَمْ أَسْحَبْ أَوْ أَشْهَرْ سَيْفًا

"Wallahi, I came in the battle in compliance to the request of my dad, but I did not add to the numbers because I knew there were Sahaba on both sides. So I kept myself low, camouflaged and disguised. I did not add to their numbers. I did not release an arrow. I did not withdraw or unsheathe a sword."

So when he impressed and explained himself, Hasan - after all, was the grandson of the Prophet ﷺ - he accepted the apology and they were united again.

A Death to Die For

I leave you with this last incident. This Ramadan I was in London. Probably it was the 10th day of Ramadan, give or take. It is something that will live with me.

And throughout my travels, I, you know, pick up on different things and I try to pass it over to other people, and that's how we learn. And sometimes Allah takes you from one continent to another continent just to show you two things. Sometimes you read an entire book just to be inspired by one line, and it's worth the while because it makes the impact. And you cross the continent and you go there, and Allah shows you something in a different way, and that's the message Allah gives to you. So this is how Allah conveys the message to you.

So I arrived in London and I go there often for programs, and they invited me to this last Ramadan that passed. And I delivered the Jumu'ah talk. Then I went to the hotel, had some rest, and after Asr I had a session. And I had my session, concluded my talk. Friday, it's Ramadan.

And just after I concluded, we moved to the rear of the masjid, and in the rear of the masjid they had some tablecloths that were laid out and some iftar food that was prepared. So the entire congregation that was participating in the discourse also moved to the rear of the masjid. I concluded it followed by a dua.

Allah is listening to me, and I share this with you so that it's a reminder for me and for you. It was 8:59 PM. It was Friday. It was the masjid. It was Ramadan.

Friday is a very blessed day, and many scholars argue the time between Asr and Maghrib on a Friday is the most blessed of the Friday, arguing that the Sa'ah Istijabah - the moment of acceptance - is between Asr and Maghrib. Difference of opinion, but many scholars hold the view.

8:59 on the clock. The date in my hand. We about to break. The brother sitting in front of me starts dropping to one side and he collapses. He collapses.

So they: "Shaykh, what do we do?"

I said: "Just look at him. Probably his glucose or sugar has dropped. It's a long fast. It's, you know what, 20 hours. See if you can probably just resuscitate him and give him some water."

He doesn't respond. I beg for your undivided attention. He doesn't respond.

The clock strikes nine. We all break the fast. We don't make much of it. "He's just probably, you know, his sugar is low."

We're trying. The doctor is called. The paramedics are called. The emergency service is called. We offer the Maghrib prayer.

A few people are just taking care of him. At that day, the day I arrived, the iftar was prepared in the masjid, in the same masjid in London. So we were there after Maghrib salah as well.

It was a matter of 15 to 20 minutes and we realized the panic and the urgency, and they had to break the news that: "I'm afraid, this man is on his way out and there's no way he's going to make it."

It wasn't long before Isha - he took his last breath and he moved on.

Some wish for a death in the masjid. Others wish for a Friday. Others pray to be fasting. And some hope for Ramadan. And some are fortunate to have it all together.

I posted on social media: "A death to die for. A death to die for." A death to die for.

My curiosity in me was too much to find out about this man. What was it about this man? Attended my talk, went in the back. In my life, I never witnessed this. Sitting in front of me, like one minute left, and Allah gave him that death in the state of fasting. Suhoor in London, iftar in Jannah. Suhoor in London, iftar in Jannah.

I got a hold of the next of kin and I said: "Brother, my empathy and sympathy with you. Please tell me something about your brother."

He teared and he said: "My brother never held a grudge for any human in his whole life. My brother never..."

I said: "My brother, your brother's story will live with me and I will take it wherever I travel, and may that be a source of goodness for him in Akhirah and a source of motivation for us."

Conclusion

May Allah grant us the ability that we can stand up from here and that we can master the courage to forgive.

Allah said: If you want Allah to forgive you, then forgive your brothers and Allah will forgive you.

I would like to thank the Ulema and Shuyukh and brothers of Miftah that have invited me and very passionately arranged this event. I pray, hope and wish that our assembly here today and all the brothers and sisters that have come out in their numbers - many of my good students have come across from over the border - may Allah reward them and grant everyone a safe trip back.

And may Allah make our assembly here meaningful for us all, and may we return from here spiritually energized and invigorated as better humans who can contribute greater to this country and to the planet.

May Allah make our assembly here meaningful for us all, and may we return from here spiritually energized and invigorated as better humans and contribute to this country and to the world.

Closing Dua

"Our Lord, give us in this world [that which is] good and in the Hereafter [that which is] good and protect us from the punishment of the Fire."

Reference: Surah Al-Baqarah 2:201

"Exalted is your Lord, the Lord of might, above what they describe. And peace upon the messengers. And praise to Allah, Lord of the worlds."

Reference: Surah As-Saffat 37:180-182

End of Khutbah