The Story of Prophet Yousuf

The Story of Prophet Yusuf

Introduction

Thank you Saif for the translation and Nour for the recitation. As I'm sure many of you all know, today's talk will be centered around the life of Prophet Yusuf and it's one of the most detailed stories in the Quran, both involving human weaknesses such as jealousy, hatred, pride, deception, as well as noble qualities such as patience, loyalty, bravery, nobility. So before we get into this, I'd just like to introduce our speaker for tonight.

Speaker Introduction

I'm introducing to you, he's an American Muslim scholar based out of Washington, D.C. He was born as William Webb in 1973 in Oklahoma to a Christian family including a grandfather who served as a preacher. At age 14, he lost interest in religion going through a self-described spiritual crisis and after converting to Islam in 1992... I'm going through a crisis right now. After converting to Islam in 1992, Webb left his career as a DJ and studied at the University of Central Oklahoma where he earned his degree in education.

He also studied privately under extended religion learning enough Islamic Arabic to become a community leader in Oklahoma City where he was hired as Imam at the Islamic Society of Greater Oklahoma City. Now moving forward, this man has also spent several years in Egypt graduating from a university from the College of Sharia which focuses on Islamic law and jurisprudence. And after graduating, he moved to Santa Clara in the San Francisco Bay Area where he worked with the Bay Area Muslim American Society Office and Muslim Community Association.

And on December 1st, 2011, Webb was inaugurated as the Imam of the Islamic Society of Boston's Cultural Center, the largest Islamic center in New England. So he's had over 60 years of experience by serving various communities in North America and he's currently managing an institute for training American Imams in the Washington D.C. area where he currently resides. He's a strong advocate for grassroots Muslim activism to promote social change.

And if we're talking athletes, his name is one of the 500 most influential Muslims by the Royal Islamic Strategic Studies Center. His website, sohebwebb.com, was voted the best blog of the year by the 2009 Grass Pressing Awards. His tweets won him the vote of best Muslim tweeter of 2010.

So brothers and sisters without further ado, it is our honor to introduce you all to Imam Soheb Webb. I don't know if you can hear me so you just have to let me know. There's a lot of microphones.

Opening Remarks

Khaled, you've gotten more complex over the years. Bigger budgets, more complexities. Mashallah, it's great to be back in New York on Halloween, alhamdulillah.

After spending three days in New Jersey. I realize how that sounds now. But it's great to be in New York after being in a different area of America.

And it's great to be here at the I.C. NYU with Brother Khaled, his family, as well as many of you who I've known for a number of years, have a really interesting relationship with New York City going back to the 90s. Tremendous friends and leaders such as Imam Siraj Wahaj, Imam Abdel Malik, who maybe some of you know who's now in Orlando, Imam Talib in Harlem, and other personal acquaintances and friends. And it's great that when I was told the topic, initially I was told in, I think it was May, that there's like some kind of Halloween party or something happening.

So then I figured it was just like the Halloween, like, you know, runs parallel to Halloween type thing. And then just a few days ago, I was told that the topic had changed and that people wanted to spend some time with scripture, with the Quran, and that actually really pleased me because I believe that Quranic literacy is one of the key components of a Muslim personality, regardless of if they are an Imam or a student, a parent, whatever. Each and every one of us has a responsibility in having a relationship with the Quran.

The Study Quran Translation

And then, alhamdulillah, I was given a copy of this. I'm sure you've probably heard about it. This is the study of Quran.

This is the bootleg version that I bought in Spanish Harlem around 2 o'clock in the afternoon today. You can't find this anywhere else now. Actually, which will be released on the 17th of November, was translated by Dr. Said Hussein Nasser, who, of course, is in the D.C. area, and worked on by 11 editors.

One of them is Joseph Lombard, who is at Brandeis University. Shaikh Shakir, his name is Shakir. And also Maria Dukkaki, who also is a very respected professor.

And Mohammad Rustam. And a number of people who put 10 years into this translation to render it into English for English speakers. And then what makes it absolutely incredible is there's no Arabic in it, so the bottom of it is primarily just based on really authentic explanations of Quran that are not going to give you all of the answers, but are going to inspire you to do further research, but kind of tell you, hey, go look here, or go read this, or look for this article, or read this tafsir.

And as a community, Shaikh Hamza has said that this translation is perhaps one of the most historical moments for the English-speaking Muslim community. And I encourage you. I know in D.C. we are actually doing a launch of it on the 24th at Busboys and Poets, which is kind of like this hipster restaurant by Howard University, to celebrate the Quran and to own it as a community.

Celebrating the Quran

You know, Allah says in Surah Yunus (فَبِذَٰلِكَ فَلْيَفْرَحُوا - fabithalika falyarfahu) (Quran 10:58) - Allah says we should celebrate the Quran.

And coming out on Amazon and actually being advertised by Amazon, I would encourage you to write a review on Amazon and to rate it, because definitely the Islamophobes have already started to really hunt this translation down and try to discredit it. And you find now affluent Muslims, alhamdulillah, making donations to their universities where they are alumni and donating, like, you know, 300 or 400 copies of this to their Middle Eastern studies departments as well as their libraries.

And that's the kind of, like, reception the Quran deserves. The Quran deserves an excitement and a passion that sometimes we lack because of language and also because of context. So I was really happy to hear that you wanted to spend some time.

I was assuming that I have a sense of humor. If you don't know me, don't don't freak out. But I was assuming it was like two or three verses.

But then I was told it's Surah in an hour and a half. So what I plan to do is, number one, to talk about what are the rights the Quran has on us. You know, we all of us have the responsibility of having an individual relationship with Quran.

The Right to Approach the Quran

One of the things I find unique is when I talk to people who are born Muslims is they ask me, like, you know, am I worthy of speaking on their behalf? Are they worthy of approaching the Quran? Are they good enough, if you will, to have a relationship with the book of Allah? And this is actually is one of the tricks of Satan. So my response to them is that at the age of 17, my friend and I, he was Muslim. I was producing music for him.

And we were smoking copious amounts of marijuana. And it was in those moments that we actually started to talk about Islam. And I'm not encouraging.

I'm just saying this is how it happened. And then, but in Jannah, inshallah, that's another story. But it's Jannah.

I can do what I want. So I found a copy of Quran actually in the studio where I was producing gangster rap music and DJing for groups like Cocaine Crew and Mafia Style and AK Assault. You know, like these are really, you know, carriers of piety.

But it was in the studio that I started to read the Quran. And then I took it, I stole it. So then I stole the Quran.

I didn't, I was like, It's like an axiom, you can do what you, like eating pork, you know, you're going to die. So I stole the Quran and, sounds wrong. Then I put it in the restroom of my mother's house because I wasn't Muslim.

Relax, man, don't get it twisted. And I was 17, right? And I started to read the Quran because I was scared that my mother would, you know, eviscerate me if she found it. My mother's a Christian woman from the country, right? My mother was raised on a farm.

So she's a Church of Christ and Church of Christ people are very literal. Like we didn't wear shorts. I couldn't listen to music.

It was hardcore. We ate at home. We didn't eat outside.

And I found Islam in that situation is the point I'm trying to make. So if I found spiritual encompassing and the ability to increase my spiritual capacity being inebriated, making gangster rap music as well as like death metal and doing so in a restroom in the house of a staunch Christian woman, I'm sure if you are already born Muslim, you have the ability. And that's why one of my teachers used to say in Mosque, He say that when Allah says in the 24th chapter of the Quran (نُورٌ عَلَىٰ نُورٍ - nūrun ʿalā nūrin) (Quran 24:35) - like light upon light, he was like, that's a Muslim who reads the Quran because a Muslim already has light.

So when they recite the Quran, Allah increases their faith. And I feel sometimes as a community, we intimidate people, man. We're so intimidated about revelation and religion that it actually works against really what the Quran is trying to do.

The Quran is trying to inspire us to live a responsible life. That's why it's called Al-Wahi. So let's talk quickly.

The Rights of the Quran Upon Us

Imam Al-Muhasibi wrote this really amazing book called Risala to Mustarshideen. We teach it in DC once a month, Alhamdulillah. And Imam Zayed translated a very good translation called the epistle for the seekers of guidance, the letter to the one who's seeking God.

Maybe if I was going to translate it in a little bit more of an ASAP Rocky type vernacular, I would say the epistle, the letter to the one who's lost and who's seeking a way out. And in that book, Al-Muhasibi says that the Quran has the following rights on each and every one of us. Before we start this, I thought it's important to say that.

He says, (أَنْ تَعْلَمَ فَرِيضَةَ كِتَابِ ٱللَّهِ وَتَعْمَلَ بِحُكْمِهِ مِنَ ٱلْأَمْرِ وَٱلنَّهْيِ - ʾan taʿlama farīḍata kitābi-llāhi wa taʿmala biḥukmihi mina-l-ʾamri wa-n-nahyi) - He said, you know that the rights of Allah's book upon you are the following. The right that the Quran has is that you live it, that you practice it. That you act on its orders and prohibitions.

You struggle. And what he means here, we'll talk about this as we get into Surah Yusuf. He doesn't mean perfection.

He means that you make an attempt. You struggle. I struggle.

Finishing the Quran with Actions

You know, there was one companion of the Prophet, peace be upon him. He was one of the last companions to die in Iraq. He was one of the last three companions to die.

And one day, his student came to him. And he said to him, Why are you so happy? He said, today I finished the Quran. He was like, what? Like, really? Like, but you've been Muslim for like, for a hot minute.

I mean, you've been Muslim for a while. Like, today? Like, you became Muslim after the battle of Badr. Like, and you just finished it today? He's like, no, no, no.

I didn't finish it with my words. I finished it with my actions. So he said in Arabic, he said, No, no, I didn't finish it like reciting it.

I finished it with my deeds. I mean, I finished it with my actions. So he said, I don't understand.

How do you finish the Quran with deeds? He said, when I became Muslim, I promised that I would try to act on the Quran. Like every prohibition or injunction, command, I would act on. So he said, it's kind of funny.

He said like, I finished 20 years ago actually, but there was like one I couldn't get done. And he was like, which one is that? He was like, in Surah An-Nur, when you knock on someone's house, and they're not home. He said, every time someone was home.

I couldn't find someone home. Right? And Allah says (فَإِن لَّمْ تَجِدُوا فِيهَا أَحَدًا فَلَا تَدْخُلُوهَا حَتَّىٰ يُؤْذَنَ لَكُمْ - fa-ʾil lam tajidū fīhā ʾaḥadan fa-lā tadkhulūhā ḥattā yuʾdhana lakum) (Quran 24:28). So, you know, if they don't answer, you should go back. So every time I went, someone was there.

But today, Alhamdulillah, no one was home. So he said, today, I finished the Quran. And there should be an attachment to Quran.

Living with the Quran

That's why, you know, many ulema, they say it's haram to joke with Quran in the sense of like to defile it. But they would say, if you are able to contextualize Quran in your life in a way that doesn't domesticate its transcendence, then even that's somewhat makruh, not haram. Because it shows that you've digested the Quran.

Abdullah bin Mubarak, he's a great scholar, you know. And he was a student of Imam Abu Hanifa. And he was like interesting person.

Very eclectic. And one day he got lost in the desert. Well, not lost, sorry.

He was traveling in the desert. Ibn al-Jawzi mentions this. And he found this woman.

And he said to her, what happened to you? And then she said, (ثُمَّ إِنَّكُمْ أَيُّهَا ٱلضَّآلُّونَ ٱلْمُكَذِّبُونَ - thumma ʾinnakum ʾayyuhā-ḍ-ḍāllūna-l-mukadhdhibūna) (Quran 56:51) - She read this verse from Surah Al-Waqi'ah, which means, Therefore thereafter you have been led astray, those who lie. So she was trying to tell him, someone tricked me, and now I'm lost in the desert.

She answered with Quran. And Imam Abdullah bin Mubarak, he said to her, where are you going? She said رَبِّ ٱلْمَشْرِقِ )Quran (55:17) - The Lord of the East. So he started getting confused. Like every time I ask a question, she answers with Quran, man.

Another narration, he said a sixth of prophethood. What does that mean? That doesn't mean like tonight I see in my dream, you know, DJ Khaled is gonna give me some money. I just want to say Imam Khaled so bad, like he says that the other guy, but I couldn't, I don't want to embarrass you.

I don't think he even knows who that is. But let's say in my dream I see Imam Khaled, and it says like, yo, go to Imam Khaled, and Imam Khaled is going to write you like a fat check. So next morning after Fajr, I go to Imam Khaled, I'm like, I saw a dream, right?

And it's a portion of prophethood. He said, hook it up. Right. Some people misunderstood what this hadith means actually is, if we see a dream, and then later on that dream comes true, then it's equated to a portion of prophethood.

You understand? Like for example, we had this brother that I knew. We went with Jamaat Tabligh when we first converted. They kidnapped us.

And we went, and we saw a Malaysian community, and then I saw him making dua passionately at night. So I said, what are you? He said, please ask Allah to give me a Malaysian wife. I said, man, what were you looking at, man? We were making dawah.

He's like, don't worry about it. But then mashallah, he married a Malaysian woman. He told me I had a dream that I married a Malaysian woman.

And I was like, are you sure that's not like a pickup line you use at Isna? Y'all don't know about me, do you? So he said maybe. But the point is he did see this dream, and then mashallah, it happened. So that's like part of prophethood.

You understand now what that means? So Prophet Yusuf is shown a dream. He's brought into a metaphysical world.

The Importance of a Support Group

But then in order to manage the metaphysical world, he has to rely on the support group. And the support group here is his father. So one of the things that we should think about as we are young from the story of Yusuf and as we struggle, I mean, listen, I lived in San Francisco. I lived in St. Louis, Detroit.

I lived in Cairo. I lived in Boston. I know you love Boston.

And I lived in D.C. I have never seen a city as fast as New York City in my life. It's fast, man. It's fast.

It moves quickly. So in order to really survive that speed, that current, right, I need to have some spirituality, but I also need to have some support group around me, someone I can help maintain my balance. So we see Yusuf has both, the beginning of the story.

He has al-ghaybiyat, the unseen, his ru'ya, his dream. But he also has his father who grounds him and helps him stay focused.

The Meaning of the Dream

Now, after that, the story continues. And it's very interesting because after he tells his father that he sees 11 people and the sun and the moon prostrating to him, most of the scholars said that the stars are obviously his brother, but the sun and the moon are his parents. And they differ. Is the sun the mother or the father the mother? Those of you who are involved in gender studies, I respect you, I love you.

Listen, don't get mad at me. I'm pro-choice on that issue. If you want to say the mother is the son, God bless you.

If you want to say the father is the son, God bless you. I'm open to both interpretations, okay? But the point is that we, as students in New York City, or me as I live in Washington, D.C., I am reflective of the light I've received from my parents, from that peer group. So the idea that I'm alone now and I'm not responsible may not really hold water because the outcome of having that severe support group is I have to be responsible in how I carry myself.

Parents as the Sun and Moon

So Sayyidina Yusuf and his brothers are reflecting the light that his parents, his mother and his father gave him, mashallah. And for parents, that means that we are the sun and the moon of our children. Meaning that one of us, and this is why I believe both interpretations are proper.

Whichever one is more obedient to Allah will shine brighter. So that one becomes the sun. And the other one who may be struggling with that double apple mint is receiving that light from the other spouse and then that light is radiated upon the children.

But you can see the beauty of how parenthood is portrayed and the support group is portrayed. We'll talk about that in a second.

Being Strategic: Don't Tell Your Brothers

But after he tells his father that I saw these 11 stars and the sun and the moon prostrating to me, does his father say like, yeah, oh, okay, you're going to be on Who's Who, and we're going to tell everybody you had this amazing dream, yes, my son, da-da-da-da-da. What does his father tell him? Don't tell people about it. But in particular, don't tell who? Don't tell your brothers. So here we learn a hard lesson.

It's a tough lesson. You know, like in the Godfather, right, you're friends and you're enemies, right? Sometimes you might got a lot of enemies, right? You know, watch it. I'll do it back-to-back too on you.

But just because people may be close to us doesn't necessarily mean we should trust them. So his father is teaching him, yes, with success you have to be strategic, right? With success you have to be strategic. (فَيَكِيدُوا لَكَ كَيْدًا - fayakeedoo laka kaydan)

Like when I plant, (يَكِيدُوا لَكَ شَيْئًا - yakeedoo laka shayan) means I plan to hurt you, right? So he says (فَيَكِيدُوا لَكَ كَيْدًا - fayakeedoo laka kaydan) that indeed they will plot against you. So he's taught now the balance of life between the metaphysical and the physical, a support group, and then also to be strategic, to take precautions.

Taking Precautions: The Example of Maryam

You know, one of the things that the Quran constantly teaches us is to take precautions. Medical science tells us one of the most difficult experiences anyone can ever have is childbirth. And he's seen that YouTube clip, that guy from Sweden, where he's like, I wanna feel how my wife felt. I'm like, that dude is crazy.

I'll just let you tell me about it. Or I'll read like Maya Angelou and like figure it out for myself. But I'm not trying to plug up to no earth-shattering, kidney-breaking, spine-busting experience.

So I already love my wife enough. I don't need to do that. Right, brothers? Exactly.

So this guy, brothers like look at their wife. Can I say okay? Can I have permission? I'm gonna get y'all in trouble. So they hook him up and he like basically in two and a half seconds basically loses it.

Medical science says the most difficult pain we can experience is childbirth. Women experience childbirth. Human beings.

Look at Sayyidina Maryam. She's having a baby. And Allah says (وَهُزّي إِلَيْكِ بِجِذْعِ النَّخْلَةِ - wahuzzee ilayki bijiz'i al-nakhlati) - Allah says, even though you're experiencing labor, grab that big freaking date tree and pull it over to you and shake it.

Yeah. How many of you had a baby? Anyone here? What would you do if your doctor told you, grab a date tree and shake it? I'm calling my health care provider. Where's Yelp? Minus one.

Shoot, this doctor is crazy. But our scholars say, even though she couldn't do it, Allah is teaching us that we have to take precautions. We have to make effort.

Keeping Blessings Private

So he's telling his son, be careful with blessings. And that's why sometimes my teacher, when I was memorizing the Quran, he used to tell me, don't tell people you memorized. He's like, especially Surah Al-Baqarah.

Don't tell people. Like some things you need to keep secret. But that doesn't mean, and we'll talk about it later, that we become like social Neanderthals and social derelicts.

We should also celebrate the graces of Allah, but strategically.

And then Allah says that (إِنَّ الشَّيْطَانَ لِلْإِنسَانِ عَدُوٌّ مُّبِينٌ - inna ash-shaitana lil-insani 'aduwwun mubeen) - Indeed shaytan is an open enemy to humanity.

Meaning that, and here's something really cool. It's not your brothers that are gonna freak out on you, but shaytan's gonna mess with your brothers. So this is where we see how Yusuf is able to keep it just.

Later on in the story, he forgives his brothers. (أَأَنتَ يُوسُفُ - a'anta yusuf) - They ask him, are you Yusuf? He says, I'm your brother. He forgives them.

Allah is saying, Listen, don't hate them. Understand that shaytan is going to mess with them and change them. And that takes us to something very important.

The Seven Strategies of Shaytan

Shaytan. Shaytan basically has seven strategies for all of us. We should know these well.

I wrote it as a poem one time when I was in Azhar. No disrespect to Egyptians. I love you.

We cool. I get it. But sometimes the lecture was extremely boring.

Mashallah. I'm sure that never happens here. So I would start to doze off in class.

However, if you fall asleep in a class in Egypt, you have basically made yourself eligible to lose any semblance of your human dignity. So basically, don't fall asleep. So I wrote this poem because I read this book about the tricks of shaytan.

And he has seven سبعة علامة ابن القيم - I wrote it. It said seven things which Ibn Qayyim mentions that shaytan tries to do to us.

First is to make us disbelievers. And it does that through two means. Doubts and desires.

I mean, there are grown-up people right now in this city. I'm talking about 43 old men dressed like Pan. I'm serious.

They're dressed like Peter Pan. And they're not with their kids. I'm not making fun of anybody, but it's strange.

It's a grown man dressed like Peter Pan, right? And Christopher Robin, you know what I'm saying? How old are you? 46. Where's your kids at? I don't have no kids. What I'm saying is like... Sorry.

I'm laughing with them in all of their Panness. Okay? I'm not laughing at them. Astaghfirullah.

Astaghfirullah. So... You okay, bro? Your brother let it out right there. Maybe he has the Pan suit at the crib, you know? He's like, I wish you'd hurry.

My pixie dust out. But two means by which shaytan takes us out to disbelief. One is doubt and desires, right? So dressing up like Pan.

May fall under both. I don't know. But doubt is remedied, and our scholars said doubt is remedied by questions.

Access to Scholarship

Asking, you should have access to imams. You should demand, right? You're going to have disposable income soon. You're coming from NYU.

That is a driver's license to get a job. Basically, mashallah, wherever you want. Okay? At least that's what they say about it.

When they charge you all those fees. But the point is, if I'm donating to a 501c3, I am going to make some suggestions nicely. I'm not going to be Tony Soprano or Tony Montana and walk in and start shooting board members.

No, but I'm going to say, listen, I'm writing a check. I don't want my daughter praying behind a wall. Okay, I'm writing a check.

I would appreciate it if there was an actual functional, say, a charter and SOPs and a strategic vision. And we all know that strategic vision. And we work as a community for that strategic vision.

It would be great if it was audited twice a year, externally and internally. I'll pay for that. I'll hook you up.

I'll write a fat check for that. But I'm not going to write a fat check if we're going to argue over what kind of asphalt we're going to use and which contractor is going to get the contract to lay the asphalt. I'm not donating to that.

And one of the things that I will donate to is that every community member has an access to scholarship. People should be able to ask questions of imams. When I take a job as an imam anywhere, and I'm not looking right now.

But when I do, I lay down two conditions. Number one, I am not a counselor. I need counseling.

I'm not going to be giving counseling. You understand what I'm saying? I don't want to be meeting with people and trying to help them solve their marriages. So we brought in Boston clinicians on campus to do that.

Because then you're freed up to teach. You're freed up to ask questions. All of us.

I remember as a convert, I would go to the office of the imam, and he said, I said, what are you busy with? Well, see, his brother, his wife, threw the mulukhi at him last night. And I had to go to their house. I'm like, but that's not why you studied.

That's not what you do. Your job is to teach me and teach others. So there has to be access to knowledge.

Dealing with Doubts and Desires

So the first one is the ability to deal with doubts is by asking questions in a safe place. We don't have to worry about it turning up in the masjid newsletter that Friday. The second thing is desires.

Desires will deceive us. Right. Desires are the best muftis.

They can help us find our way out of any situation and justify anything. So the first is to make us disbelievers. The second is to get us to fall into innovation.

Bida. The third is to make us fall into the major sins, like major haram. If you can't do that, then it's minor sins.

If shaitan can't do that, then it's the disliked. And if he can't do that, it's to get us to waste our time on the permissible.

Wasting Time on the Permissible

People ask, how do we waste our time on the permissible? I had this roommate in college. He's a really cool guy from Karachi, man. He's awesome. Mashallah.

We used to eat aloo paratha like every day. Right. With achar.

He was such a cool brother. But he loved video games, man. Like, there's, like, I like video games.

And then there's, like, intervention. Like, he's intervention. So I remember it was Ramadan in the last ten nights, and the first halo came out.

So now you know how old I am. First halo came out, and this brother lost his mind. It was the last ten days of Ramadan, and he told me, like, I'm going to solve this game or whatever.

I'm not into halo. So I said, really? He said, yeah. I said, but it's the last ten nights.

He's like, well, you know, I got to. Right. So he actually was about to, like, spend all his time playing Halo where it's like last ten nights of Ramadan.

You know, maybe something better you could be doing than playing video games. That's like wasting. But then he told me it's permissible.

Right. It's permissible. Right.

It is permissible. No doubt. But it's one of the tricks of Shaitan to get us to waste our time on the permissible.

The next is to get us to choose the lesser of two good. So I have two good things in front of me. I choose the lesser of two.

And then the last is an all out assault. Talk about that in the future. But an all out assault is found in the story of Satan.

Right. Again, so I'll mention the strategies of Shaitan. Here is a mention in the Shaitan.

I'll do a movie. Shaitan is the enemy to you. The first is what? Kufr.

Second, innovation. Third, major sins. Fourth, minor sins.

Fifth, the disliked. The sixth are permissible. And the seventh is Muharraba.

The Brothers' Jealousy

Now, the story continues. And we know that his brothers become aware of certain blessings that Sayyidina Yusuf has. And they begin to become jealous of him.

Al-Hasad is a little bit different than just jealousy. It's envy. Hasad means that I wish you didn't have it.

And I wish I had it. And I question, why did God give it to you instead of me? This is what the meaning of Hasad is. When we say (وَمِن شَرِّ حَاسِدٍ إِذَا حَسَدَ - wa min sharri ḥāsidin idhā ḥasad) (Quran 113:5).

Three Remedies for Envy

And the ulema said there are three remedies for that envy. Number one is to pray for the person I'm envious of. I should pray for them. Number two is to speak well of them.

Some people bring it up like, say, I'm really jealous of DJ Khaled. Right? And I'm like, well, you know, like that thing he wore with the Pope, you know. It was a little too white, dude.

Right? Like, that's like, I'm being, I'm not being serious. Right? But that's like that passive, because it was clean, mashallah. But, like, that's like passive aggressiveness that I'm using to like knock him down.

Right? And then the third thing is, they said, is you should give them gifts. Right? You should give them things. Like, you should be good to them.

And that's how you deal with that envy that's in the heart. Right?

The Brothers' Plot

The story continues, and we know that his brothers, they tricked his father. And they encouraged him to let Sayyidina Yusuf go with them. (يَرْتَعْ وَيَلْعَبْ - yartaʿ wa yalʿab) (Quran 12:12) - He said, he can play, he can relax. And their brother said, I'm scared. Their father says, I'm scared that (يَأْكُلْهُ الذِّئْبُ - yaʾkulhu al-ḏhiʾb) (Quran 12:13) - I'm scared that a wolf will eat him.

They reassure their father. And, of course, he lets him go. And we know what happens.

They fake his death. They throw him in a well. There's actually a conversation amongst themselves.

Should we kill him or should we not kill him? They throw him in the well and they leave him.

Family is Not Utopic

Now, here's the other lesson we want to take from the story. How many of you ever gone to like a conference? And there's like either a topic about youth.

Right? First of all, someone called me a youth the other day. I'm like, this is getting out of hand, man. Youth is like 13 and down.

Okay? But there's discussion for younger community members or families. And you go in there and like the topic is like how to have the perfect marriage. Or how to raise the perfect child.

Right? Or if you're young, like how to become the perfect youth. You know what I'm talking about? And you keep hearing about things that maybe as a human being are very normal to be doing. And you get this idea that like the idea of family is perfect.

Hence, we see young Muslims. It's difficult to get married in the Muslim community, man. Like for real.

It's not just difficult because parents say no. But like people are difficult. Some of the things that people ask me to find for them.

I'm like, I can't find Matt Damon who be praying to Hajj 24-7 and works for a hedge fund. Like that dude don't exist. And his sister's like, well, off to the zawiyah.

Or the brother, you know, I can't find the Eva Mendez in Niqab, dude. I can't. Right? Ariana Grande.

I don't know what that is. I don't objectify our sisters like that. What's wrong with you, man? And she has to speak like, you know, Gujarati.

And she's Latina. I'm like, how does she go from Latina to speak Gujarati? Like what do you want? Right? It becomes really irrational.

And it's great to have high expectations and want that six-pack. I get that. I understand it. But sometimes write down really what you're looking for, and you're going to be like, oh, my God, what's wrong with me?

Families in the Quran

But we learn something from this story about family, and I really believe that's why today we had a very powerful discussion with our convert community. I call them the acceptors. I wrote it down. So I accepted Islam.

I like that better. You know, they've accepted faith. Right.

And that is that family is not utopic. It's not. And you see this here in the story.

So let's let's look at the families in Quran and compare it to the families that we hear about sometimes in discussions. Right. I remember I was at this one thing and they were like, and there was this man kind of Roger and Saliha.

There was this man who was righteous and he used to pray on one leg for two years. Why would you pray in one leg for two years like that? Because he was so solid. He prayed on one leg and feel it's not even allowed.

If you have two legs, you have to pray on them. So I was like, come on, bro. Who's the first family in the Quran? The first story.

Oh, there's a normal family. Imagine if you came to it's not with that problem. Say last night, my son was barbecuing and his brother got jealous and basically eviscerated him.

What should I do? Sheik. The chicken was good. What's the second family in Quran? No.

Yes. Oh, there is a normal family. Allah says, (إِنَّهُ لَيْسَ مِنْ أَهْلِكَ - ʾinnahu laysa min ʾahlika) (Quran 11:46) - he's not your son.

I mean, imagine hearing that, man. He's not your son anymore. Son drowns, doesn't listen to his father.

So the third family is who? Sayyidina Ibrahim. Same normal family. Son, I'm going to throw you in some fire.

Son, I'm going to slaughter you tomorrow. I saw in a dream. It was all a dream.

Oh, okay, dad. Imagine you went to Isna. My father said he had this epiphany.

And tonight when I go home. Right. After Sayyidina Ibrahim, what's the family? Sayyidina Yusuf.

I mean, imagine if you're at a conference. I'm not making for the conference. That's what we all gather, right? We have these questions.

And someone raised their hand. So last night, we got mad at my little brother. So we bumped that dude on Craigslist.

And trying to sell that cat. That's what happened to Sayyidina Yusuf. After that, who? Musa.

Oh, there's a regular family for you. You're raised in the house of your enemy. Your surrogate is the guy who's oppressing your people.

And you have to keep it cool. And then you continue. Maryam.

That's a normal family. I'm pregnant. I ain't got no man.

That's like some stuff on TV nowadays. Seriously. Pregnant with no man.

Find out later. Seriously, I'm not making fun of her. I'm saying.

And the reason I'm talking to you like this. And people who get insecure and worried about it. I know.

You're probably going to write a blog post about me. I get it. I don't mind.

But listen. If you don't speak in a language we can relate to and understand. It's going to be hard to grasp these things.

But really, that's how it was received. Look at their reaction. So to Maryam.

They're like. You are pregnant? And she's like. No man touch me.

In Arabic, that's the feeling. You lose the translation. It's like.

No man touch me. But in Arabic, it's like. (مَا مَسَّنِي بَشَرٌ - mā massanī bashar) (Quran 19:20) - It means like.

I don't mess with dudes. And no dude even touch me. Like that's the emotional feeling of it.

Right? That's a normal situation. So you look at all of the stories of families in the Quran. It is anything but utopic.

And anything but normal. And these are the families of prophets. So then what about our families? Perhaps.

You know. One sister came to me. And she was telling me like.

I converted 25 years ago. And I had all these expectations. I was going to be this.

I was going to be like the reformer of Islam. And you know. I was going to solve the European Union crisis.

And fix the currency in Malaysia. And I was like. Wait.

Hold on man. Stop. And I said.

You know. Probably the answer to what you're going through. Is in the fact that you need to embrace your vulnerabilities.

Like you should address them. Instead of running from them. Using utopia as a way to escape it.

And live in a different place. Like Islam is telling us. Look.

These are the greatest families. But they had issues. So you shouldn't get it twisted.

Yusuf is Sold and Taught Through Hardship

So Sayyidina Yusuf. His brothers. Turned against him.

And they sell him. And he's sold for a paltry price. Allah says.

(دَرَاهِمَ مَعْدُودَةٍ - darāhima maʿdūdah) (Quran 12:20) - You know. Which means like. Nothing.

They consider him of no value. They had no concern for him. But throughout this part of the Quran.

Allah says.

And thus. And thus we taught him the meanings of things.

And thus we explain things to him. You know. What I understand from that is.

We learn a lot through hardship. We learn a lot through pain. We learn a lot through suffering.

The Trainer Story: Learning Through Difficulty

Have this trainer in Washington D.C. This dude is crazy. And I think he could be in the movie Saw. Without any prep.

So. We're doing this exercise. The interval training thing.

And he's like. After that. After you do this with the kettlebell.

Like 500 times. You're going to go on the treadmill. And you're going to run for like five minutes.

As fast as you can. And then you're going to come back and do a plank. And you're going to do this thing with the kettlebell.

500 times. You go back on the treadmill. I'm like.

Man. Do you do like every day? Like. Do you do this to yourself? Like.

Where's the nachos and pizza? Like. Where's the hot cheetos and strawberry pop dude? Like. This is crazy.

So then. I go on the treadmill. Right.

I think I'm slick. I'm like. Normal speed.

Like. You know. Like.

The natural speed of the treadmill. I'm like. I'm faking it.

You know what I'm saying? Because. You know. Some people don't like to run on treadmills.

This guy. Comes up behind me. And.

Turns a treadmill up. On. 355 miles an hour.

With an incline. Of Kilimanjaro. Seriously.

And. I turned to him. And I'm like.

Man. Why you do that? He says to me. Studies show that.

The harder the workout. The better you work out. He's dead serious.

And it's true. So. Sometimes.

It's through hardship and difficulty. Because. We keep seeing Yusuf go through.

Really tremendous difficulty. He loses his brothers. He loses his family.

His father loses him. He's sold for a paltry price. He's debased.

He's dishonored. And all of that. God says.

We're teaching you something. So. Maybe now.

In our lives. We go through hardship. It's.

The Boston Student Survey

You know. One of the things we did in Boston. We surveyed our student population.

In Boston. Boston has the highest suicide ratio. Amongst 17 to 25 year olds.

In America. No coincidence. It's the academic hub of America.

The amount of pressure on undergrads there. Is unbelievable. Graduate students.

We know. You know what I'm saying. But undergrads.

It's no joke. And we did a survey. As a mosque.

Of like. What are your immediate needs? And. The two most prominent responses.

We got were. Loneliness. And making sense of life.

And. And. Like.

You would think. If you got into Harvard. You're good.

If you got into MIT. You're good. Right.

Straight. Northeastern. You're good.

Making sense of life. And loneliness. We see here.

Yusuf. He goes through two. Loneliness.

And he goes through difficult challenges. That would sway anybody. But Allah keeps saying.

Through this hardship. Through these difficulties. I need you to pay attention.

This is really cool. I appreciate you. Staying.

Attentive this long. Through these difficulties. And.

Through these hardships. We teach you things. We teach you things.

Iman Bila: Faith is With You

Now. That's why. In Arabic.

We talk about faith. We say. (آمَنْتُ بِاللهِ - Aman)

Bi. That. The word.

Bi. In Arabic. Is article preposition. It implies.

Haraka. It applies movement. So.

Like. If I walked in the room. With.

Khaled. Right. Imam.

Khaled. I would say. I came with him.

Right. When you say. Bismillah.

Usually say. Bismillah. When we're doing something.

Like. I lay down. Bismillah.

I get up. Bismillah. I walk.

Bismillah. I eat. Bismillah.

Bismillah. Is brought into the context. Of action.

So. We say. I have faith.

Bi. Implying. That.

My faith. Is with me. And it.

Moves with me. You lose this in English. English.

Is black and white. Right. Arabic.

Is like HD. Right. You get these little subtleties.

Like what. It's like. Chicken tikka masala.

At the crib. And chicken tikka masala. Outside.

It's good. It's a little greasy. But at home.

Chicken cry. Is to cry for. You know what I mean.

It's a Pakistani dish. If you haven't had it. Wow.

Right. Don't tell your trainer. Though.

But. Iman bila. The word.

Bi. Means with. So.

My life. My hardships. My difficulties.

The successes. Everything I've achieved. The hardship.

The lowest of the lows. The greatest of the greats. Bila.

Is with Allah. Like. Faith.

Is my boy. Faith. Got my back.

That's the feeling of it. So. Even the prophet says.

And. It means. Through all seasons.

So. The use of school. Through it.

Hardship. Difficulty. He gets purchased.

Something happens to him. It's hard to fathom. Why is that happening? It's okay.

To ask. Sometimes. Why things happen.

People say. My God. I shouldn't ask.

Why things happen. But you are. Anyways.

Your heart is asking. Why don't you ask. Right.

But. The answer. Or the.

The solution. Is something that. Sometimes.

Is hard. To stomach. Hard.

To take. But he keeps his identity. He's sold.

We know that he's sold to someone. And then eventually. I'm going to have to summarize.

Because of time. He falls into the hands of. Someone named.

Aziz. And some scholars say. His name wasn't Aziz.

He was just referred to as Aziz. In Quran. Like someone who's strong and mighty.

And we know finally. Hey. Things working out for you.

Now. Like in this nice plush house. You got kind of an easy job.

Everything's working out for you. Everything's cool.

The Test of Seduction

And then we know. He runs into some challenges. And that is that. The man's wife.

Was interested in him. She wanted to seduce him. And what we understand.

Also from the Quran. Is that. Yusuf himself.

Would have slipped. Unless Allah strengthened him. Unless Allah strengthened him.

But that's an incredible challenge. Right. And here's something you can see.

From the story. So far. He faces.

Material challenges. And he faces. Metaphysical challenges.

He faces physical challenges. He faces. The enmity of.

His brothers. The salacious behavior. Of this woman.

And then his own soul. Now is challenging him. And Allah says.

If he had not seen. The proof. Of God.

He would have slipped. So you can appreciate. Now as a young person.

Where he's coming from. Material challenges. And spiritual challenges.

But he keeps it. Struggles. He tries hard.

He grinds his teeth. Spirits. He grinds it out.

So it's part of life. Right. Lost.

Success. I remember. Man.

Basically. Not to scare you. But from.

Twenty three. To twenty seven. You're probably going to be.

Perennially a broke. Simply because of student loans. And the fact that.

In college. We bought. All kind of crazy.

Cool stuff. Right. This is being in college.

And it still happens. Even at thirty. Forty.

I remember. But then like. Thirty.

Thirty one. Thirty two. You start.

You start balling. Man. You start collecting.

Them dead presidents. You know what I mean. It's like.

You got a little Smithsonian. In your bank account. And you're like.

And it's that. Like time of life. Where you like.

Look at your bank account. Like six times a day. And you're like.

Masha. Wow. I got five thousand dollars.

In my checking account. Like. So awesome.

There's no minus sign there. So happy. Right.

Five thousand dollars. And you're like. But then as you.

You know. You start to clock it. You know.

You start to. Make some dough. And.

I remember the first time. This happened to me. I made a good amount of money.

And then I got a. Message from the IRS. And. All that money.

Was gone. Within a month. And I said to myself.

Man. A lot can give and take. Times just.

Come at you. And it reminds you. That you are not in control.

And one of the lessons. We take from the story. Is that.

Everything that's happening to him. Is to remind us. That God.

Is stable. But this world. Whether it's poverty.

Whether it's success. Whether it's. You know.

The things that we might desire. Whether it's. The acclamation of wealth.

Is fragile.

Yusuf Chooses Prison Over Sin

So he gets. In this incredible position. We know that he. Refrains from. Being seduced by this woman.

And then we know. That a group of women. Plot against her.

And him. And he has to make a choice. And he has to make a choice.

And. You know. The choice of Yusuf.

Is absolutely remarkable. Because. Choices are going to always come up.

Every single day. We make choices. Every single day.

We make choices. But he makes a big choice. And that choice.

Really. Is a powerful metaphor. For our whole life.

Just like Ismail. The slaughter of Ismail. Is a metaphor.

Every one of us. Has an Ismail. We have to slaughter.

Metaphorically. And everyone. Has a choice.

That Yusuf made. Almost every day. Metaphorically.

To make. But what does he do? He says.

"Oh Allah. Prison is more beloved to me."

And we know that the Prophet said. The prison.

That this dunya. Is a prison for a believer. And a jannah for a disbeliever.

He chooses that. He makes that choice. And he finds himself.

Low again. And here's something interesting. About the story.

That many people. May miss. In his.

Greatest. Moments. Of.

Emotional. Isolation. And he.

And being physically. Deprived. The richness.

Of his soul. Is developed. And the capacity.

Of his heart. Is expanded. And that's why.

Sometimes. You know. We go through.

Really difficult. Times. Man.

Hard moments. You know. The Boston bombing.

For me. No. I should write a book.

About that. I mean. Imagine that.

Right. I don't care. What people say.

About me. Like. If I can't be honest.

About my life. With you. How you going to be honest.

About your life. With me. If we don't trust.

Each other. To be honest. Let's just be honest.

Let's just be real. Ain't got no money. I got kids.

As I know. About those songs. I swear to God.

But imagine. I'm going through. The Boston bombing.

Islamophobes. Are attacking me. Like a wounded.

Cow. And the Amazon. Bleeding out.

By piranhas. Like everything. About me.

They're like. He has blonde hair. Because he's trying.

To trick us. I look. Blonde blonde hair.

Man. What the heck. Man.

Those. Those blue eyes. Are like.

Contact lenses. Like. Man.

They're insane. Right. I have press.

In front of my house. Press. In front of my house.

I leave my house. Imam. Imam.

Imam. Imam. Did you know.

The Sarnia brothers. I don't know. Who are they.

I don't know. I didn't know at that time. Even who was who.

Right. You try to go to the mosque. You can't function.

And then you have. Personal challenges. But.

Subhan Allah. When I look back. In that moment.

My salah. Was so meaningful to me. And my dua.

Had such meaning. Because. I'm like.

Help me. This is no. Freaking joke.

Man. That's when you're making. When you're saying that.

In dua. You know. It's like real.

You know. Usually. It's like.

But. When you're like. Please.

Whatever. I gotta do. I'm about to crack.

This stuff. Is no joke. I can't handle it.

I know. I'm not supposed to. Talk to you like this.

But. I'm in pain. Help me.

Right. That's really. Where we find.

We reflect. In our lives. And back.

Into our lives. Tremendous. Capacity.

To do things. Later on. So.

I remember. After the. Boston bombing.

I was invited. To an institution. To do.

Some consulting. I walked. Into this boardroom.

Boardroom. And well. Like.

These brothers. Were going. At it.

They were like. Physically fighting. Right.

And my whole thing. In talking. To them was.

How can we. Create a more. Dynamic boards.

Right. So. I walk in.

And mashallah. I killed. I dropped.

The mic. You know. What I mean.

And afterwards. They're like. Thank you brother.

They even. Give me. An extra check.

I was like. Dang. Dude.

Keep fighting. Like. Yeah.

Problems. Right. You know.

What I think. There's another problem. Here we.

Let me aggravate. This for you. But then.

I realized. Like. Comparative.

To what. I went through. In the past.

Now. Things were easy for me. So.

It goes back. To. Kind of.

That. That model. Being trained.

Prison and the Greatest Muslims

So. You should. Find.

Himself. In prison. You know.

Some of the greatest. Muslims. Came out.

Of prison. Right. And in the 90s.

In the early. 2000s. Our MSA.

Is nationally. Had actually. Organized.

Services. For Muslims. That were incarcerated.

And of course. I want you. Mom.

Jamil. Is incarcerated. And.

Malcolm X. Becomes. Malcolm X. In prison. Right.

And. Sayyidina Yusuf. Used to.

Find. Himself. In prison.

And you know. Prison. Could have been.

An excuse. To go crazy. But.

What do they say. About him. In the prison? They say

- interpret this dream. Right? He becomes the moral compass and the leader.

He could have lost it. We don't need to deconstruct it that way. He goes into prison, you know what? That's it, man. I'm going to run to show up in this joint narco. I'm going to narco this prison.

But instead, he uses it to encourage himself to be better. The more difficulties we face, that means the greater capacity we have to hold it down.

Tests Purify Us

The prophet was asked by people, who are those most beloved to God? He said, those tested the most. Another narration said

(إِنَّ الْعَبْدَ الصَّالِحَ - inna al-ʿabda al-ṣāliḥa) - the righteous servant will be burned clean of bad qualities like with tests, like gold and silver are burned, meaning they're purified by it. They come out pure, sallallahu alaihi wa sallam.

And we have to hurry because of time, but we know that the story continues, continues, continues, until ultimately, he finds some success. And at the end of the story, he greets success. And this is the last quality, really, that we should have. As we fall into success, we should become more grateful.

Being Honest and Grateful

You know, I said some things about my life tonight. You might have been like, I can't believe he said that. Why

not? Have we created a community to the point that we're so stigmatized we can't be honest with each other? Like, you are beautiful people.

I got a good view here, man. I get the Norton, you know what I'm saying? All that Norton in your hearts, right? But how can you be honest if your imams, or teachers, or servants can't be honest with you?

But as we become more successful, I remember my teacher from West Africa. You know, his main teacher was his sister. His sister was a great scholar.

She memorized the Quran in 14 different ways. And she was an Arabist. She was something else, man. She was a poet. And I remember he told me, he said, look, if you achieve notoriety, don't forget to keep it real.

And I was like, what do you mean? Like, of course, like, look at all these rappers around me, man. They're real. I was a kid, you know what I'm saying? I didn't know.

I was like, they're real. They keep it real. They're honest.

He was like, no, no, no, no. Don't allow your success to cause you to forget people. You know what I mean? You have to stay down.

Yusuf's Humility in Success

So we see Sayyidina Yusuf, how does he embrace promotion? One of the dangers of the academy, I worked at Harvard for a while. It's not in that long, weird, freaky bio that our brother read earlier that I didn't even say that. I was like, you know, and he says about himself, right.

And I worked there at Harvard. I can go that way. In Boston, there was a time I started to feel kind of like full of myself, man.

Because the academy can give you a real false sense of value. You know, you get kind of big. We should be happy.

We should be proud. We should be grateful. We should feel like, as a Muslim, yeah, I can drop the mic if needed by the help of Allah.

I can kill this and murder this paper, metaphorically, by the grace of Allah. I can succeed as a professional, yes, and own it and get it, but not forget where it came from. That's what happens to him, you know.

When I memorized this surah, I was scared to read it because I always cry at the end. In Arabic, it's so beautiful.

You know, his brothers are vulnerable, man. They did all this crap to him. Excuse my language.

Like, look what they did to him. Like, if someone did that to me and I was Yusuf, I'd have been like, yeah, yeah, what's up now? Dig a hole, deep one, and get the pit bulls and the rami. Right? I could have just done some

wicked stuff to them.

But in the way they speak to him in Arabic

(إِنَّكَ لَأَنتَ يُوسُفُ - innaka la-anta yūsuf) means like, they're extremely weak. They're almost shocked. They're overwhelmed by it.

And he says, yep, and this is my akhi. And then he says

- Allah has blessed me. Like, I don't know if it was me, I'd have been like, y'all remember what y'all did? Well, your boy, your boy killed it.

And guess what? Hull. But Yusuf is like, yes, it's me by Allah's grace.

Prophets and Professional Success

And we see this in the Quran, how the prophets accept professional success is unparalleled. Prophet Isa is born a scholar. He's born like master rabbi from the 36 chambers. You know what I'm saying? Like, he's holding it down.

He's no joke. And he comes out talking. I mean, you want to talk about having swag? You come out as a baby, knowing all the rabbinic law? Like, what? Really? Eh, you can talk? What's the first thing he says

.

I'm a slave of Allah. That's the first thing he says. Look at Prophet Muhammad on the night of Isra wa Mi'raj, alayhi salam.

He goes to the highest levels of heaven. When he gets there, he's with Jibreel, and he says, Jibreel, you go ahead. Jibreel's like, what, what, huh? He's like, no, you got to go.

He's like, no, no, go ahead, go ahead, go ahead. He doesn't get it twisted. Fame doesn't twist him.

He doesn't forget. He doesn't forget where he was.

The Story of Greasy G

I made this mistake. When I converted, I had a friend, his name was Greasy G. He was a blood, 456 Pomona, Peru. And we were really good friends, man.

Like, good friends in high school. And after I became Muslim, because Greasy G, you can tell by his name, is a little wild. He's a little greasy. And I'm talking about, like, WD-40 style.

Like, really greasy. And I was like, I'm Muslim, and you're Greasy G. I can't hang out with you anymore. And I cut him.

Had nothing to do with him, just cut him off. Really out of a sense of arrogance. You know what I mean? Not out of a sense of concern for myself.

I used that as an excuse. There was an interview, he's in prison now. There was an interview done with him by a guy from Berkeley who was doing this paper on me.

Probably wrote that bio. And no disrespect to Berkeley people. And in the paper, he found this guy.

Like, I lost track of this brother. And he went to see him in a state prison in Oklahoma. And he asked him, like, do you know what happened to Will? And he was like, no, man, what happened? Is he alive? Like, I remember he became Muslim, like, then he just disappeared.

And we were in high school, and you know, he was doing well, but I heard, you know, something about him wearing red, white dresses. Like, he's like, no, he's like, he's, you know, he's kind of, like, done something, you know, with his life. So then he told him who I was, right? In the most simple, humble terms, mashallah.

And he showed him my Facebook page and stuff. And then he said, he started crying, and he said, why did he leave me? You know, why did he leave, why didn't he take me, why didn't he take me with him? And then the reporter was telling me this, and he was like, yo, you need to call him, dude. Like, you know, reporters are not supposed to lose, or they're a guy who's doing his research.

You're not supposed to lose that human, you're supposed to stay a jerk, basically. And he was like, you need to call him, man, because this is not cool. I'm like, just do your paper, dude, right? But I got it twisted, and I forgot someone who is important, right?

Not because of financial success, not because of professional success, but because of religion. What would be my excuse?

Stay Humble in Success

So I'm saying to you, the last story of Yusuf is extremely powerful, that in the face of success, and we now have a chance to talk about, we'll touch on it in a second, he stays humble, he doesn't forget people, man. He doesn't forget the people who even did evil to him, and he practices grace to them.

And that takes us into the idea of how we balance, because piety doesn't mean not to have swagger. I don't have a problem with that. I don't like that. I remember I became Muslim, and I went into the mosque, and this brother was like, this brother's really quiet.

If that's how he is, that's a human nature, that's your swagger. Swagger doesn't mean you have to be verbose, you know, like J.R. Smith. You guys love him.

He's so cavalier now. Sorry, right? Or say Mark Sanchez. But, although the Jets got a nice defense, right? But Tom Brady, you know what I'm saying? But swagger is different.

Like, some people are swagger-esque through their silence, and through their solace, through their piety, through their ability to be very focused and calm. And some people are very emotional, right? And that's how

they have swagger.

Yusuf Steps Up as a Leader

But we see Sayyidina Yusuf, in the middle of the chapter, he actually steps up and leads. He doesn't use piety as an excuse not to be successful. Piety's not an alibi not to be successful. He says

.

He says, I am someone who can do this job properly. So our scholars actually say something very interesting. When you read in the books of fiqh, the Maliki method in particular, we say that if somebody has the ability to be a mufti, I studied this in Dar al-Iftar, and when they're asked to do that job, and they say no, they're a sinner.

They say that some Maliki say that if you can recite the Quran properly, and you are standing to pray, and people ask you to lead the prayer, and you say no, and someone leads the prayer who cannot recite the Quran properly, your prayer is invalid. Because you should have acted on what you have as a professional quality.

So the idea of balancing responsibility with sometimes the arrogance and the sense of self-worth and hubris and narcissism of the age, Islam kind of finds this balance where, yeah, I can do this, alhamdulillah. I can do this because I've been qualified. I've done what I need to do. That's very different than me trying to be very verbose and own things.

And that's why the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam in the hereafter when people come to all of the prophets and ask them to intercede, they will say no, no, no, no, no. But when they come to the Prophet, he'll say وَأَنَا لَهَا - I'm for it.

Summary of Themes

So we didn't, honestly, like it's an hour. We can't go through this whole chapter together, right? Maybe inshallah, I'm a neighbor. You're not far from me. It's a train ride away.

You can all come down to Penn Station. I'm just joking. I can come here if Imam Khalid will hook me up with some of those miles that he has packed away, all those frequent flyer miles that he got, and do the chapter page by page, verse by verse.

But at least that way, we're able to take some of the major themes. Number one, we said an intimate relationship with the Quran. The Prophet said

(إِنَّ اللَّهَ أَهْلِينَ - inna Allaha ahlīn) - Allah has chosen friends.

The chosen friends of Allah are the people of the Quran. Second thing we said are the rights of the Quran. We mission to act on it, to have fear and hope with it, to give regard to its stories and parables.

And then lastly, to believe in its allegorical verses. And then we started a chapter. We said there's some themes that we wanna take.

The first theme was balancing the metaphysical with the physical. He has a dream, he has a support group. He has this powerful metaphysical experience.

He has kind of an epiphany, but he still goes back to his father. The second thing we said is to be careful of Shaytan. We mentioned the seven goals of Shaytan.

To make us disbelievers, to make us fall into major sins, minor sins, disliked, innovation, major sins, minor sins, the disliked, the permissible, and then just to straight up take us out. And that's why, by the way, in the masjid, what is the front of the mosque called? Mihrab, what does mihrab mean? From the word harb, the place of war, because that's where you wage war on Shaytan, right?

The third thing that we talked about is how difficulties in life come and go. We should have a strategy, but we should not allow the difficulties to move our hearts, it's hard. I don't do it, I'm not claiming I have that, right? I'm up here to teach us to learn twice, you know what I'm saying? So don't think I'm saying this and I'm like, oh, I bet Suhaib to be killing, no, no, no, no. Like everybody else, right? If I lose my daughter in aqiyah, I'm going to lose my mind, right? I'm gonna have that moment of, right? Every day I have one, right?

So I'm saying we strive to, as best we can, balance the seasons of life with keeping our identity as being spiritually focused and spiritually in tune with our Lord. And we gave the beautiful statement of Imam Ali, karamallahu wajhah.

And then the last thing that we touched on were how you find in the chapter someone who is not only tested with the externals through his family, and we talked about how family is anything but perfect, remember? So we should lower expectations, like it's voom to marry someone and expect them to be what you want. It's a form of emotional abuse, man, right?

Love and Marriage

But we love, it's like that John Legend song, man, I love all of you, like I embrace it all, right? Because that's really, when people ask me, can you help me find someone I can marry who I can love? No, I can help you find someone you can hate. And it's like, what do you mean? We could all love each other right now.

I know I could go into a nightclub down the street and love 99% of the occupants in 35 seconds. Seriously, right? But I can't hate them all. What I mean by that is if I can fight with you and keep it domestic, that means I love you.

That means I really care about you. And that's why when couples come to me, like, we're ready to be married. How long have you met? Well, one of us swiped right.

I mean, no, one of us, we met. I was like, swiped right? I was, how about you mean? People on the right side? Yeah, I'll be watching y'all. All y'all laughing are incriminating yourself.

You're gonna need a lawyer from NYU before this night's over. But they're like, yeah, I swiped right, she swiped right, I'll mend her. And like, we wanna get married.

Really, how long have you known each other? About two and a half weeks. Cool, yeah, we met at Starbucks once and we watched Three Idiots. Should've been Two Idiots, so you watched Three Idiots.

And then I say, okay, and you know what? We never fight. People that are older are like, yeah. I say, you know what? When you fight, come back.

Like, when you can have a fight and then you're able to manage your emotions and manage that, then come back. You might be ready for marriage. Because you have to marry the person you don't like in the sense of, you don't like at times, but you manage to keep that commitment to that person without losing it, without going beyond normality.

Internal and External Tests

So we say, Sayyidina Yusuf is tested internally, externally. And the last one is with his soul, right? And he's able to hold it down. And then again, he goes through difficulties.

Imam Shafi said, no one can become a scholar unless they were debased. I used to wonder, I read that in Azhar. I was in Azhar Masjid, I read that, I was like, I'm not trying to be debased, dude.

But then I understood what he meant is that you can appreciate others through your own becoming. Because Islam is a process, it's not an event. And then the last thing we talked about is how to deal with really professional success.

Right, and oftentimes, the academy, I've been there. Even when I came back from Egypt, you know, one time I was giving a lecture in California. I thought I had the red hat and everything on.

I was holding it down. And this kid that I used to teach before I left Egypt, this is my boy, right? He used to teach this young man. He came to me, he was like, Imam, I gotta talk to you.

It's code red. I was like, really, what happened? You swipe right? He was like, no, you make no freaking sense now. What happened to you? You used to be normal.

And now, you're like the people that we wanted you to replace. And I was like, exactly, I was like, we need to go outside for a minute, have a conversation. And then I became like Shaykh.

I was like, he doesn't have traditional scholarship, and he doesn't have adab with the ulema, and praising myself and not even realizing I'm so drunk in my own hubris, right? So then I go to his youth director, I'm like, you have this kid فاقد الأدب عديم المخ - right? You know, Egyptians, it's like, when we go hard, we go hard, man. Egyptians have more bars than Hershey's. Like, they could just eviscerate you.

He's like, you're fooling yourself, bro. Why do you dress like this? I was like, I don't know, because he's like, yeah, I know why.

Because you think clothes make you. He's like, clothes don't make you.

The Importance of a Support Group

Right, it's good, you need people around you. That support group we said earlier, the support group is not people who just tell you you're doing great. Like I said, the person that you should marry is a person that you can hate. The person that you should be friends with is a person that can say things you don't like to hear sometimes. Because that's what it means to be Sidq, means to be a Sidiq.

I'm truthful to you in every situation. That's why Yusuf is called what? Yusuf what? A Sidiq. Because in every context, he's truthful to God, right? He doesn't use the context as an excuse to slip, right? Just like us, we work out hard.

We use it as an excuse to eat pizza. You know, well, I worked out real hard last night. Like, I can eat what I want.

Same thing, well, you know, I was obeying a law for like a day. So tonight, I'm making rain, right? Like, how does that work? Doesn't work that way, right?

So then I complained to him about the kid, and he said, actually, man, the kid is trying to tell you something because he trusts you. You should listen to him, right? So sometimes we get lost in our own professional success.

Even religion, religion takes a lot of people out of who they should be, right? And that's why oftentimes when you find like the Muslim who quote unquote is not the most practicing, you find like spiritual energy from them that you don't find in the practicing community. You find sincerity in them that you don't find in the practicing community because the practice became a fashion, not an intimacy.

So the last thing we learn about him is how he embraces success. And he does so with humility.

Q&A Session

So we'll stop here, inshallah. We'll take about 25 seconds for questions. I wanna go to the parade, man. No, I'm just joking. I'm trying to get some candy, dude.

And whatever questions or comments or reflections, I will encourage you to share also some of your thoughts. Please feel free to do so. Yes, ma'am.

Yes, ma'am. Kamsaham. Kamsaham.

Did I ever call a friend in prison? I sent him a letter. I thought I should write him. I thought writing would be more appropriate.

So we slowly reestablished a relationship. May Allah guide him, inshallah. Yes, sir.

Are you just dipping out? No, I'm kidding. He's like, he's like, I got you. Yeah, I'm gonna come here as soon as possible.

All right. I'm just joking. I'm gonna go get some caramel candy, you know what I'm saying? No, I might drive back to D.C., so debating.

But take your time, don't worry. Yes, ma'am. I'm so sorry, I can't hear you.

Yeah, the name of this translation is The Study of Quran. A new translation and commentary. It is on Amazon.

You can pre-order it. It's really, mashallah. You know, I read Quran in Arabic.

I haven't read the Quran in English for a long time, but this is one of the first ones I picked up in English and I was like, the only thing I don't like is some of the thee and thou. Like, I wish they would change that. I have a problem with that language because of my children.

But overall, mashallah, it's very nice. Free of any ideological issues. Like, sometimes you read English translation, you can tell that person's school of thinking.

I shouldn't be able to feel that when I'm reading the book of God, right? It should be ecumenical as possible. So this one, it comes across as just really the meaning is what was intended. Yes, ma'am.

Hey, how you doing? It's been some years. At the Ella Collins Institute, first year, right? See, I'll be remembering people. Mashallah.

Actually, I'm not sure if it's her, but I'll try. It's you, right?

Dealing with Toxic Relationships

That's a great question. And that's a very powerful question. I've had this happen to me. She's saying, when do you realize that maybe someone who you trust and you've allowed into that circle, right? That circle needs to be very controlled, by the way. You know what I mean by that circle? People who can really, like the guy who grabbed me and said, like, you lost your mind, right? I keep that circle very tight.

In fact, that circle for me are people that I converted with, because they don't care about Suhaib Webb. They remember me for who I really am, right? Because who I was is who I am. I can't run from myself.

But I've been in a situation, when I started learning Arabic, there was a person who I let into that inner circle. And I started to speak Arabic in Oklahoma. I learned Arabic in Oklahoma.

You know, converse in the 90s, we just learned Arabic. It's the 90s, like, Khabaz learned Arabic. There were, I was telling him, there were conferences like Arabic للناطقين بالعربية فقط - Li natiqina bilarabiyyati faqat.

Like, it was written, like, Arabic speakers only. And you wanna go to the conference, so you learn Arabic, right? It's kind of a strange treadmill moment. So as I started to speak Arabic, of course, in the beginning, you know, I was like اسمي جيت واكد سهيب - ismi jittu wakad suhaibun, right?

You know, I speak Arabic, right? Because you learn, I was an adult, trying to learn a language that the society doesn't speak. And I was watching a lot of iftihusimsim, you know, like cartoons and stuff. And there was this brother, he would come to me, he's like أعتقد أنك لا تستطيع أن تتحدث لغتنا أبدا - ataqid anaka latastatiyan tatahdat loqatana abadan. Like, he would come to me, he was Arab, and he would say, you know, I don't think you'll ever be able to speak Arabic.

And I was like, yeah, exactly. It wasn't, it was, so I was like, in the beginning, and now I was memorizing Quran, right? And he's like وكذلك يعني الله سبحانه وتعالى ما يأمرك أن تحفظ كتابه - wakatharika yaani Allah ma yamuruka kan tahfath kitabahu. Like, Allah didn't order you to memorize his book.

And I was like, I'm a white dude from Oklahoma. Like, if I learn Arabic and memorize Quran, like, I might be able to help my friend Greasy G. You know, like, why would you tell me? And that's what happened when I was very young, I was 20, 21 years old. And he, like, hurt me when I realized, this dude's jealous, he's like a hater.

Right, so I cut him out. So, we have a very simple principle in Islam. Advice should be able to bring about something good.

Like, if it might, even if it means leaving something, it's gonna bring you closer to Allah. But advice that becomes abusive or authoritarian, and that's why one of the conditions of a community that I work in is, like, no emotional abuse will be tolerated. In the name of religion, there's no emotional abuse.

You know what I'm saying? If a Shiite brother wants to pray that way, you have a right to go up to him and, like, just eviscerate that person. You don't have to agree with that, but you don't have to eviscerate that person.

The Sister Without Hijab Story

Sister, we had a sister walk into a mosque in Boston one time without, you've been to that mosque, without hijab on, and I was walking out of my office, and this dude is throwing a hijab on her head, like, from 10 feet away. And it's Celanda Tom Brady. And it's Celanda Tom Brady. Unlike Mark Sanchez, you can hit the target in New England.

He hit her, and she started crying. So then I was like, enough. I became Oklahoma white guy, enough is enough, right? And I went up there, and I was like, just please come with me, and she grabbed my hand.

And people in the mosque were like, ooh, she grabbed his hand? I was like, man, the girl is crying. Like, it's not like, you know what I mean? She's crying. Like, she's emotionally hurt, you know? So I went to the office.

I thought she was a convert. I convert profiled her. And then she was like شلونًا كامسحلا بخار ساك طيب - shlona kamsahla bakhar, sak tayyab.

She was a Khaliji. She was from Saudiya. And she was like, yeah إمامنا - imamana.

She was like, this is the first day I've come to a mosque since I came to America. My grandfather died two hours ago. So I was in class.

I got a text. My grandfather died. The first place I knew to go was to Allah.

She was like, I just can't. I didn't even know. She's like, I'm so out there.

I didn't even know it was Juma, man. She's like, I know I'm not good. She starts to cry.

I know I'm not good. Like أنا مش صالحة وو وو مش أعرف كلام ده - anamush saliha, waw, waw, waw, mush arafay kalamda. And then she's like, but I know I can go to Allah.

And I'm like, man, this woman is like, so much more pious than I am. Like, I don't have those kind of emotional currents and I'm here to give the khutbah. Like, I'm like, you know, would you mind like, yo, put a kufi on.

It's like, you know, I ain't gonna tell nobody. Point is that kind of advice. You know, when I went to talk to the person, like, why did you throw, why did you horseshoe the hijab? You know what I'm saying? He's like, well, I wanted to help her.

I wanted to bring her closer to Allah. I'm like, so as a man throwing clothing on a woman in 2013 in Liverpool Bastion, New England, you didn't think about what that means to that woman? And he was like, yeah, I mean, she's gonna be drawn nearer to Allah. I was like, God, I don't care, man.

When to Cut Off Toxic People

So when people start to hurt us, we should pull away from them. No matter how close they are, like his brothers. What did his father say to him? Stay away from them.

Don't tell them the good news. And it hurts, man. It's harsh, man, it's tough.

My own brother, my own brother, disinvited me to his wedding. I flew to Oklahoma last year to surprise him for his wedding because I'm trying to do the Muslim thing where you fix it. You bring like some nice watches and stuff.

You hook up the girl, you know what I'm saying? Crystal, the whole nine, whatever, Oklahoma, porcelain and stuff like that, Tupperware. And I get there and my mother starts crying and she's like, I'm sorry to tell you, but

your brother disinvited you because of your fame as a Muslim preacher. So you ain't alone in this.

And then if I talk to him, he's like, well, you know, maybe you should quit your job. I'm like, why don't you get your job, bro? Like what the heck, quit my job, right? So that's the situation where I told my mom, I was like, look, I love my brother. If he needs help financially, I got his back, but I ain't got nothing to do with him no more.

Right, because you got to learn. Oh, you want to ask my mother to tell me this information? My mother's 70 years old, man. So, and I know about what you're, cut that off.

Give it time. You got to go back and visit every once in a while, but nobody should be destroying your life saying they love you. No husband, no wife, no brother, no father, no mother, man.

Destroying People in the Name of Religion

And I have a problem with this. We destroy people in our community sometimes. In the name of religion, the most gracious, the most merciful, we destroy people.

Like really? The most righteous Muslim I ever met, you know where I met him? In a hookah bar. Wallahi, my friend called me. I have a story, just don't worry.

Everybody's like, ooh. See, why y'all gotta judge me? Why you judging me? No, seriously. Outside of the Starbucks and the Fahir, I have a friend who I became Muslim with who is not Mr. Pious.

Mr. Pious happens to be Mr. Hookah. When I need to see him, right, because we do a lot of business ventures together, I have to unfortunately find him in hookah lounges like Cleopatra, Omokuthum. You know, I know all these places.

I met a Muslim convert who doesn't speak Arabic, but can say every flavor of tobacco in Arabic. Right. So I went, I met him, we're talking, right? And then there was a guy who was in there smoking and he said to me, are you who I think you are? I said, hey, look, look, the only thing I got here is water, man.

I'm good. But then he started telling me about his life and his struggles, and I was brought to tears in the hookah lounge, man. Because he was just like, he wasn't infected with that sickness we have of needing to destroy people.

He was still sincere. You know what I mean? So we should pray for you. One of the things we do in D.C., we have community prayer where we, instead of someone standing in front of us and praying for us who doesn't know us, we ask people like, what do you need us to pray for? And people raise their hand like, we had a brother who's like, my son got shot last night.

And people in the audience who are Muslims are like, we didn't even know. Like, how can I be your brother? I don't even know your son got shot. His sister raised her hand.

You know, the gentrification, I don't know about Harlem, but D.C., basically they just pour Clorox on D.C. It's no longer Chocolate City. They call it Latte City. Like, seriously.

And it happened so fast, the projects in front of my house are now gone that those guys I used to know across the projects from me, their family comes to visit them and they ask me like, Big Will, call me Big Will, don't call me your mom. They're like, where are they? I'm like, you didn't hear they closed their projects? They're like, we didn't even know. Like, this is how fast they close their projects.

So it's creating a tremendous stress on communities. And the sister raised her hand and she was like, I can't pay my rent tomorrow, man. And people were like, but we were just with you yesterday and like, we went to this conference and like, you don't really know people till you hear like what you should pray for them about.

It's like for you, man, may Allah give you strength. Because I know that situation, man. There's times I prayed for you when I was in Umrah, after we talked in the masjid, right? I'm telling you that so that you know, like, you're not alone, man.

Sometimes it's hard, right? So may Allah strengthen you, inshallah. Any other questions before I get emotional? Yes, ma'am.

Enter Through Different Doors

That's a good question. So she's saying, and so to Yusuf, there's a part where Yaqub said ادْخُلُوا مِنْ أَبْوَابٍ مُّتَفَرِّقَةٍ (Quran 12:67) - udkhulu abwa mutafarriqah. Right, Sayyidina Ya'qub says to his sons, after they've gone to see Yusuf, then Yusuf tricks them and they go back to their father, they're bringing back their brother, they lose their brother, they go back again. Then he's like, when you go back again ادْخُلُوا مِنْ أَبْوَابٍ مُّتَفَرِّقَةٍ - udkhulu abwa mutafarriqah.

Not because of hasad, not because of envy and jealousy, but because of strategy, right? Enter different doors so people won't notice you. If you go together as a group, you'll be noticed, but you need to break it in there, like you need to handle this without a lot of people noticing what's happening. Not because of ayn and hasad, he was worried people would arrest him or take them.

So he doesn't want to lose any more kids. You understand what I'm trying to say? So one of our teachers, we asked him about the political system in America. He was like, you know, there needs to be Muslim Republicans.

I was like, what? Whatever, bump that dog. He's like ادْخُلُوا مِنْ أَبْوَابٍ مُّتَفَرِّقَةٍ - udkhulu abwa mutafarriqah, go through different doors. And then he said, you learn from the story of Yusuf that an empty chair can't speak for you.

So it's more about participating. So we should think about in America, if we're gonna enter through the doors of the society in different ways, we've already entered, right? I mean, you're in New York City. Are you aware of like hip hop's marriage with Islam in this city? And how we fail to really respect that.

Hip Hop and Islam in New York

The woman who puts on the most, I would say, organic, gluten-free, real hip hop shows in New York City is, you know, Fabio's wife. You know, Mr. Fabulous is a Puerto Rican convert from the Bronx who was part of the Rock Steady Crew in the 80s. His wife, Christy, was featured in the New York Times.

You know, she brings together like DJ Red Alert and KRS, Public Enemy, all these incredible, old, massive giants, Grandmaster Kaz and all the Q-tip. That's a Muslim woman that organized it, in hijab. She's gone through a different door, right? There's no reason why Muslims in New York ain't turning New York out, right? Just because of the amount of talent you have and the differences that you bring to the table.

In Boston, a beautiful, incredibly regal black woman walked in my office. She's like, Imam, I need you to endorse me for mayor. I said, what? My father's a PhD in American history, so I'm using, guess what, dad? You know what I'm saying? He was pumped, right?

And I was like, well, can I ask you why? She said, and she had these two guys with her in these really weird suits. But the point I'm trying to say, I was scared. I was worried. She said to me, I need to talk to you.

I want you to endorse me. And I said, why? She said, Imam, are you aware of the diversity of your community? I was like, yeah, I mean, she's, are you aware of how many ethnicities you have in your mosque? I was like, no. She's like, I have these two people.

They did a study of your community. And we have discovered that you have 91 ethnicities in your mosque. Do you know what that means? I said, yeah, headache.

I mean, iftar is a monster. These people want achar, these people want pot roast and mashed potatoes. And these people want trainers.

They want sweet potatoes. It's a mess. She said to me, Imam, that means power.

Diversity is Power

So diversity of going through different doors, that's why we should not try to standardize religion in our community. We should embrace the saint and the sinner. Understand that people have different roles to play.

Whether it's our brother Ismail, the calligrapher, going to take pictures of Big Sean, hey, that's his role, man. That's what he does. If it's one of our sisters holding it down in one of the finance district areas, holding it down.

One of our sisters fighting gentrification in Harlem, hey, hold it down. It's one of our brothers who's a sheikh and imam, hold it down. One of our sisters who's a sheikh and imam, hold it down.

If it's Imam Khadid selling meat to people, hold it down. Want my discount, want my brisket tonight, brah. But I'm saying that's ادْخُلُوا مِنْ أَبْوَابٍ مُّتَفَرِّقَةٍ - udkhulu abwaab mutafarriqa.

What our community has tried to do is standardize, in the face of modernity, standardize how religion is practiced and create this kind of monolithic, you know. And that's not realistic. ادْخُلُوا مِنْ أَبْوَابٍ مُّتَفَرِّقَةٍ - Udkhulu abwaab mutafarriqa.

Any other questions? Yes, ma'am.

Post-Traumatic Stress and Finding Community

Yeah, I mean, that happened to me after the Boston bombing, right? There are things that people said I said I didn't even say. And then people ran with it like, imagine as a convert, man, someone calls you like a non- Muslim, man. Like all you struggle for as a convert, to hear that, you know what I mean? To be abused. And I came out of the Boston bombing almost like, yo, I don't trust the community no more, man. You know what I mean? If I wasn't an imam, I told sisters and brothers today, like, if I was an imam, I wouldn't go to the masjid, right? At that time, I go for Allah, alhamdulillah, but I'm saying the social piece.

And it took me, you know, some time. Actually, I had to pull out of institutions and just be independent. Now, to really recover, man, from some of the experiences that I've had in institutions and with organizations, and that's not to say all institutions or organizations are bad, right? They're not.

Imam Siraj, great community, Khaled here. He has some great communities in California. Boston's a great community, DC.

TNIC is a cool masjid. But when we are, one of the worst things we can do is really question a person's faith. That's why in all the books of creed, we are not allowed to question a person's faith.

You know, the prophet never said anyone is a kafir amongst the sahabi, and he never said that anyone is a person of taqwa. He left it to Allah. But the assumption is everybody's good, right? The assumption is people are good.

Everybody got issues, right? Some of us, Allah hid our issues. Others, our issues may be more apparent. You know what I'm saying?

So I would encourage for a person that's gone through, they call it now post-traumatic stress religion syndrome or something like that, is that they should find a community that embraces them, accepts them, and helps them heal, man. Because what broke us is what heals us. In Oklahoma, my grandma used to say the best remedy for the snake bite is the snake venom. So sometimes it's finding that community that can model the opposite of what we experienced.

Nobody Can Define Your Worth

The second thing is, listen, nobody has the right to tell you how valuable you are. Never give anybody that control over your life. I don't care who it is.

Because that's just too much authority to give to people. People love to live vicariously through others. Sense of power, right? So I validate myself through the community, naturally, because I'm part and parcel of the community that I'm responsible, that I live with, and they live with me.

But at the same time, like, I have to be, Allah says, (وَلَا تَزِرُ وَازِرَةٌ وِزْرَ أُخْرَى - wala taziru waziratun wazirukh) (Quran 6:164). I'm responsible for myself. So I would encourage, and then I would say, contact someone like a chaplain, like Imam Khalid, someone that has more of a pastoral background, than, say, a clerical background, right? May Allah help you, inshallah.

Any other questions? If not, barakallahu feekum wa jazakum allahu khayran. It's always great to be in New York City. As-salamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.

Thank you. Thank you.