The Powerful Prayer of a Mother

The Powerful Prayer of a Mother

Sh. Omar Suleiman | Khutbah

Introduction

Dear brothers and sisters, the last few days in Dallas have been very interesting, and this last week has been an interesting week within Dallas with many discussions that involve some serious theological components as well as political components. This idea of forgiveness versus justice, this idea of accountability and the beautiful gesture of the brother of Botham Jean who was murdered when he showed forgiveness for the murder of his brother and what that means in terms of justice and accountability and humanizing, I think more so, the family of a person who was wrongfully gunned down while he was sitting in his own home, sitting on his couch eating ice cream when an officer walked in and shot him dead twice, sparking the first conviction of a Dallas police officer since the 1970s.

The Pain of a Mother

SubhanAllah, there was the mother of Botham Jean, a mother that captures the sentiments of what you would expect in terms of pain from a mom who not only raised her child to be safe but to be successful and prosperous. If you've gotten a glimpse into the dynamics of that family, you will know that that is a family that was extremely protective of their children. SubhanAllah, I just spent my last moments with her I just came from that where the family is going back to St. Lucia.

She told me something I didn't know because we talked about the police shootings that happened in July 2016. She said that her son had actually moved here just two weeks before July 7th 2016, and she remembered him standing on the balcony of his condo taking videos of all the police driving around downtown and sending those videos and those pictures back home and how scared she was for him from those moments. She was afraid and she thought at that moment "I should pull him back because it's not a safe place for him to be." SubhanAllah, what ended up happening to him two years later was that he would be murdered for no crime of his own.

You see a mother that will express in a very raw fashion her pain at the injustice that she suffered. Not only that, but throughout this entire year was putting forth mothers of police brutality victims that had not had the chance to speak in front of a camera like she did, saying "you should talk to this mother and you should talk to this mother and you should talk to this mother."

The Dua of the Oppressed

A mother who found out about her son being murdered while she was sitting in the lobby of the Dallas Police Department - they did not even have the decency to notify her that her son was killed. She found out through her phone watching a press conference with the police chief that her son was killed. She ushered forth mother after mother after mother and said "listen to them because you haven't listened to them for all of these years and you should listen to them."

These statements that she threw - the last statement I heard from her today, if any of you saw the press conference where signs were held "remember so-and-so," the victims of police brutality, and she said "let me hold the sign for my son because I want to hold my son." When she said just a few days ago on what would have been his 28th birthday, "to lose a child is to feel the pain of labor in your womb again" - she expresses it very in a very raw manner and very articulately and in a way that a lot of mothers that had lost their children could relate.

You watch that person and you watch the pain and you watch the inability to move on and you think about what type of mercy that Allah has put in the heart of a mother for her child, what type of mercy and love and perspective that Allah has put in the heart of a mother for her child, so much so that she connects that experience to the moment she gave birth to him and the power of a woman calling out.

Yes, I know someone might say "well she's not a mu'mina." The Prophet (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) said:

"The supplication of the oppressed person - there is no veil between that supplication and Allah, even if the person that is making the dua is not a believer, as long as they call upon Allah and they say 'Oh Allah' calling out in pain and oppression, there is no hijab, no veil, whether that person is Muslim or not."

(Tirmidhi 2180)

The Prophet's Mercy for All Creation

There's another element to this. Someone might be saying "Sheikh, we've already dealt with Kashmir and there's too much going on right now for me to really care about this situation seriously enough. There are moms that look more like my mom or look more like my wife or that sound more like something that reasonably could happen to me and I should be focused on that because I don't have the capacity for that."

I remind you that the Prophet (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) in the midst of a ghazwa, in the midst of a battle, on an expedition, saw a red bird that was flying over. The Sahaba looked up at that red bird in distress and the Prophet (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) said:

"Who has distressed this one with her child?" (Abu Dawud 2675)

He didn't say "the bird is mad." If you took the sentence of the Prophet (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam), you could think he was talking about a human being and the Sahaba might have thought maybe he's talking about a human being when he says it in that fashion. He was talking about a bird in the midst of a major expedition, but the Prophet (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) notices a bird complaining about her child.

One of the Sahaba had taken the egg or taken the child from the nest and the Prophet (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) said "give her back her child, give her back her child." Even the Prophet (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) saw that an animal, a bird, in the midst of that was caught because there's something about a mother with her child, even when it's not even human, that connection of rahma.

The Mercy of Allah Through Mothers

That one part of Allah's mercy that covers the entire existence as it is here that we experience now - the 1% that we hope, bi idhnillah, out of the 99% which we will experience in the Akhira. Allah would cover us in that exclusive mercy that is far more encompassing that's encompassed, that small portion here that's encompassed - how much of it is encompassed from a mother to her child, a parent to their child, and particularly specifically a mother to her child? Muslim or not Muslim, human or not human, there's that connection that Allah puts there that's extremely special.

The Prophet (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) taught us to honor that connection. Allah teaches us to honor that connection in so many different ways in the Quran. Then you see the supplication of the oppressed and you see those images broadcast constantly that numb us, but you'll see the dua of a woman, a mother in Palestine, or the dua of a mother in Kashmir, or the dua of a mother from the Uyghurs oppressed, talking about her child, and you think how near is that supplication to Allah and you don't want to be on the other side of that dua.

Fear the Dua of the Oppressed

You know you hear the dua where the Prophet - the saying of the Prophet (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam):

"Fear the supplication of the oppressed." (Bukhari 2448)

You might think that the Prophet (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) was talking to Abu Jahl. The Prophet (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) was talking to Mu'adh ibn Jabal (radiallahu anhu) as he was sending him off to Yemen - a great companion, a great one of the fuqaha, one of the jurists of the companions, of the greatest of the companions - and saying "be careful, don't transgress" because a lot of times we think of dhulm and we think grand. Your mind immediately goes to Egypt or Syria or wherever, not the potential that I might provoke the dua of someone against me.

That person's dua is connected to Allah unknowingly. I may transgress on somebody else's rights, backbite somebody which is a transgression, which is a form of dhulm, and they call out to Allah against me. May Allah protect us from ever provoking that type of a dua against us, ever provoking that type of a cry against us.

The Accepted Prayers

But I want to stick to the dua of the parent. The Prophet (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) says in a hadith in Tirmidhi, he mentions three types of duas that are accepted:

1. دعوة المظلوم - Da'wat al-mazlum - the call of the oppressed

2. دعوة المسافر - Da'wat al-musafir - the supplication of the traveler

3. دعوة الوالد على ولده - Da'wat al-walid ala waladihi - the supplication of the parent for their child (Tirmidhi 1905)

The Prophet (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) said in another narration which is also authentic:

"The supplication of two parents for their child." (Ibn Majah 3862)

Though it says "ala waladihi" - the prayer of a parent against the child - it also encompasses the prayer of a parent for the child, as the scholars of hadith have mentioned. Oftentimes you can read the opposite meaning - not of the meaning but the implied - from a hadith. So if the Prophet (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) mentions an accepted prayer against, then that means the opposite of which is for. So just as you should fear the dua of the oppressed against you, it could be that the dua of the oppressed for you is your saving, is your saving dua on Yawm al-Qiyamah when you support someone who is mazlum, when you support someone who is oppressed and they make dua for you.

Warning Against Praying Against Your Children

The Prophet (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) mentioned:

"Don't pray against yourselves or your children or your wealth because it could be accepted. You might say it in anger." (Abu Dawud 1532)

Especially the more severe implication of this, which is to actually take an oath or a covenant, to take a yameen, an oath that implies cursing your own children because it could be accepted and you might say it in anger, you might say it in a moment. But be careful - don't make dua against your children, don't let that become a form of your discipline because Allah listens to the dua of the parent when the parent makes dua in regards to the child.

Be careful, don't let that become a part of your anger. Instead, make dua that Allah guides them in your anger, don't make dua that Allah punishes them even when you're upset because it has potency.

The Story of Jurayj

We have the story of Jurayj that the Prophet (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) mentioned to us. I'll summarize because of time: there was a righteous man, an abid, a person who worshipped Allah non-stop, but he did not listen to his mother when his mother called out to him one day to take care of a very small task. She prayed against him that Allah would not let him die until he met a zani, until he met an adulteress.

Later on, some time passed and a woman came claiming that Jurayj was the father of her child. Jurayj was put through a massive trial. The end of it was his innocence because he was innocent, but Allah answered the dua of the mother against him and clarified his innocence. (Bukhari 3436)

There is something to the dua of a parent against a child, and may Allah protect us from ever being on that side of a dua where we anger or displease our parents justly, or our parents are justified or justly angry with us, or we do something unnecessary to trigger their anger. May Allah never allow us to be amongst those who have that dua made against us from our parents. Allahumma ameen.

The Blessed Dua for You

So the opposite implied - what does it mean to actually get the dua of your mother when your mom or your parents will actually say "Oh Allah" and they'll have something that is favorable to you implied in that dua?

In this khutbah, I'm going to use a hadith from Sahih al-Bukhari. The entire collection of Sahih al-Bukhari and that legacy and what it means to the ummah would not be possible without the dua of a mom - a very simple one. It's not simple in the nature of the request, but it was natural in how it flowed from her heart to her tongue.

The Mother of Imam al-Bukhari

Her Child's Dua

Her child was blind and she made dua to Allah that Allah cure the blindness of her son. Allah sent her the good news that her son had been cured through Ibrahim (alayhis salam) - seeing Ibrahim (alayhis salam) in a dream giving her that bushra, giving her that glad tidings. She wakes up and she goes and she sees her son, and her son could see.

Everything that we have from Imam al-Bukhari - every single time a hadith is narrated from him, every single time one of his works that is not typically ascribed to him is of benefit to the ummah - it goes back to that dua of a mom. It goes back to that supplication of a mom for her child. She didn't know that she was making history when she was making dua. She was just making dua for Allah to cure her son. She wasn't thinking, she did not say "Oh Allah cure him so that he can compile the greatest book written in the history of mankind." She didn't do that. She just said "Oh Allah cure him."

She made dua out of love for her child that Allah cure him, and Allah answered her, and we all have her to thank for that. Beyond that absolute gratitude going to Allah, the vehicle of that cure was the dua of the mother of Imam al-Bukhari.

The Greatest Act of Obedience

There's a narration where Ibn Abbas - a man came to him and confessed of a major sin and he responded to him and said "Is your mother alive?" He said no. So he just said "Then go seek forgiveness from Allah." "Why did you ask if his mother was alive?" That's what the students asked him. "Why did you ask him if his mother was alive?" He said "Because I don't know of a greater act of obedience to Allah than (بر الوالدة - birr al-walida) - honoring the mother. I can't think of anything else that could possibly expiate a sin that heinous, that major, like honoring his mother. It is the greatest way to honor Allah."

Even if your mother is directly telling you to disobey Him, in the situation of Sa'd ibn Abi Waqqas (radiallahu ta'ala anhu) whose mother took an oath that she would not eat or drink and she would not wash her hair or go inside her home until he left Islam. Can you imagine that type of torture to Sa'd? That his mom says to him "I will not eat, drink, comb my hair, remove lice from my hair, or get out of the sun until you renounce Islam."

Allah sends down a verse ordering him, despite her ordering him to curse Allah, Allah orders that he honor her:

"And We have enjoined upon man, to his parents, good treatment. His mother carried him with hardship and gave birth to him with hardship, and his gestation and weaning [period] is thirty months."

Look, she carried you - We have ordered, specifying the mother, that she carried you in pain, she gave birth to you in pain, she fed you in pain, she nurtured you in pain. She went through all of that for you. She deserves that honor even in that situation. She deserves that honor.

The Story of Uwais al-Qarni

There's this incident that's very prominent because it's the Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم) mentioning someone who he did not meet but that the companions would meet. The Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم) said "If you meet this man, then solicit dua from him, then ask him to make dua for you."

Who was this man? It was a man by the name of Uwais from Yemen, may Allah be pleased with him, who never got to meet the Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم). What held him back from coming to the Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم) was his mother.

Why was he so special? Why would the Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم) not only make dua for him and mention him, but have that inspired to him even though he never came to the Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم)? Because what held him back from actually physically joining the Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم) was his honoring and service to his mother.

The Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم) told the companions "If you meet this man, if you see him, then you will recognize him" while also making mention of his virtues. When the Hujjaj would come from Yemen, Umar would go to these people and ask them "Is Uwais amongst you? Is Uwais amongst you? Is Uwais amongst you?" until finally they point to this man Uwais.

Umar goes to him and says "Are you Uwais ibn Amir?" He says yes. He starts to inquire further about his tribe, about where he's from, and he said "Did you have leprosy and you recovered from it except for spots that's the size of a dirham?" - meaning Allah cured you from leprosy but you have a spot which is to remind you of that blessing of a cure. "Yes."

So every time he asks him, "Yes, yes, yes." And he says "I heard Rasulullah (صلى الله عليه وسلم) say that there will come to you Uwais ibn Amir from the reinforcements of Yemen. He had leprosy from which he recovered but a spot the size of a dirham. He has a mother and he honors her, and I swear by Allah that if he were to swear upon Allah, if he was to take an oath upon Allah, Allah would honor that oath just because of that - that one thing that he does." (Muslim 2542)

He was not cognizant of his place in history, just like the mother of al-Bukhari did not know the implications of what she was doing when she was praying for her son. He did not know the implications of what he was doing when he was serving his mother. He thought he was just a guy in Yemen that was serving his mom and that was doing basic khidmah.

The Story of Abu Huraira's Mother

As a result of that, Umar (radiallahu ta'ala anhu) asks him to pray for him, and Umar (radiallahu ta'ala anhu) said "Where are you?" He said "Kufa, Iraq." He said "Can I make you a governor of Kufa? Can I appoint you to an office or something?" All of this honor - why? Because Allah honored him through that.

There's another young man from Yemen who accepted Islam along with Tufail ibn Amr ad-Dawsi, may Allah be pleased with them. A young man who came back to the Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم) from Daws, from the tribe of Daws, and accepted Islam. As he brought his mother with him to Medina, can you imagine the pain of Abu Huraira when he's coming to meet the Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم) - his mom is cursing the Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم). His mom would dishonor the Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم) and refuse to believe.

Abu Huraira (radiallahu anhu) came to the Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم) in pain and he said "She says these things about you and it's hurting me. I don't know what to do." The Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم) did not say "Well here's a sword, go take care of that." The Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم) did not say "You know, dishonor her, disobey her, say something to her." The Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم) saw the pain of Abu Huraira in wanting that hidayah for his mom so bad and responded to the request to make dua for his mother.

Allahumma ahdi umm Abi Hurairah

"O Allah, guide the mother of Abu Huraira." (Muslim 2491)

Abu Huraira (radiallahu anhu) goes home and he can hear the water running - she was taking a shower. When she finished taking a shower, she was doing ghusl. She told Abu Huraira (radiallahu anhu) she accepted Islam right there. Abu Huraira (radiallahu anhu) was so full of joy.

This man who was from Ahl as-Suffah, from the people of the masjid - may Allah grant hidayah to all of our parents, those of us in this majlis and beyond who want so badly hidayah for their parents, may Allah accept that dua from you. He saw that moment he got to receive that.

The Daily Dua Exchange

So he got her a place, a garden, a home. Every day after salah he'd go to the masjid of the Prophet and then he'd go visit his mother. Every single time he'd finish with his mother, he would say to her when he would greet her "Peace be upon you, my mother." She would say "And upon you, my son." Then he would say:

Rahimaha Allah kama rabbatni saghiran

"May Allah have mercy on her as she raised me when I was a child."

She would respond:

Wa akramahu Allah kama barrni kabiran

"And may Allah honor him and have mercy on him as he has honored me and obeyed me in my old age."

You can imagine that was the dua of Abu Huraira that he would hear five times a day from his mother: "Oh Allah, have mercy on him because of the way that he treats me in my old age."

I guarantee you, Abu Huraira (radiallahu anhu), not knowing his place in history at the time - every one of our hadith collections does not equal in the sight of what it was like to hear that from his mom every day: "Oh my Lord, have mercy on him the way that he honored me in my old age."

The Limitless Power of a Mother's Dua

Dear brothers and sisters, that single dua is so precious. There is no limit to that dua, no limit to that supplication of a parent. There is a narration - it has no sanad, it has no chain, so I'll put that out there - but it has a beautiful lesson that Musa (alayhis salam) asked Allah who is his companion in Paradise. He was told about this particular man and he goes to see this man. He's anonymous, at least as far as Musa (alayhis salam) was concerned to the public.

He goes and he spent some time with this man. He asked his permission and all he would see is that every day this man would save the best food, the best water that he would collect, he would do what he could, and then he would enter upon his mother and he would serve her every single day.

Musa (alayhis salam) asked him what was happening in that process and he said "Every single time I serve her, then she makes this dua" - and he does not know that it's Musa (alayhis salam) in front of him - "that she makes this dua: 'Oh Allah, make this son of mine the companion of Musa (alayhis salam), the companion of Moses in Jannah.'"

SubhanAllah, the dua of a mother could even get you the companionship of a prophet. That lesson is valid. The dua of a mother could get you the mention of a prophet, as in the story of Uwais, and more than all of that, it could bring barakah in your life and acceptance in the hereafter in ways that nothing else can.

Practical Lessons

So what does this mean for us?

1. Natural Service Induces Barakah

That barakah is induced, that blessing is induced through natural service. You don't call your mom or dad now and say "make dua for me." Take it as a lesson for you to do things that will naturally induce a good dua.

2. Honor Deceased Parents

If your parents are not alive, then just as when they are alive you are to honor them with that goodness, then honor them with good deeds in their name. That's a continuous charity. Those good words, those good duas, those good mentions, and those deeds will reach them. On the Day of Judgment, they will be holding those good deeds that you did on their behalf and testifying in front of Allah for you. So that door is not shut.

3. The Mother-in-Law

The last thing I want to speak to because it frequently comes up in the community: the mother-in-law. None of these khutbahs are excuses for oppression - all of them speak to a norm. A lot of times when the mother-in-law is mentioned, it's like "Oh no, well that's not my mom."

If the dua of a mother can bring that much barakah in a person's life, you better want your spouse to get that dua from their mother - husband and wife. Part of your making your spouse a more complete Muslim and getting that barakah in life that has effects for you and potential rida, that potential pleasure in the hereafter, is when they get those duas from their parents.

Don't see your mother-in-law as an opponent in that sense of khidmah, because it may be the khidmah that your husband or wife gives to their mother that brings that barakah in your married life and in your life in general and your acceptance in the hereafter. Don't see them as opponents - help your spouse honor their parents.

Conclusion

May Allah allow us to honor our parents and may Allah allow us to be a force in honoring mothers in society and fathers in society. May Allah allow that to be on our scale of good deeds and may Allah accept the prayers of our parents for us and may Allah accept our dua for them. Allahumma Ameen.