How To Cope In Difficult Times
By Omar Suleiman | 2026-01-06T18:46:49.601989+00:00 | Topic: Time
How To Cope In Difficult Times
Omar Suleiman
Introduction: Perspective on Our Current Challenges
I'll just say that I think one of the falsities we sort of sold ourselves at the times that we're living in now are more difficult than the times that were before us and I don't think that's necessarily true. I mean if you look at the time of the Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم - sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) and what he and his companions had to face, I mean we're living in rahmah compared to that. I mean being tortured you know in Mecca and the Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم - sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) openly seeing this torture and he couldn't do anything in the material realm to stop it and that's a very difficult thing and people coming to the message of God (صلى الله عليه وسلم - sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) saying make dua against Quraysh, you know, ask Allah just to destroy them and the Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم - sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) he gave them an answer that I feel is for us, it's like nations before you went through a lot worse than you and they were patient through it and so you know we've had it so easy in America I've had it so and this is a rahmah from Allah (جل جلاله - Jalla Jalaluhu) that now some of the challenges are starting to come in.
I don't know about you Umar but I always felt I was waiting for them to come you know I mean like I'm seeing the Muslim world and what's happening and all these different countries and I'm like when's something going to start here not that I was I wanted it but I knew something was going to happen and then we see the rhetoric and now we're facing it and so because I feel my personal view is that our community has a lot of spiritual potential that we haven't fully tapped into yet I think they're on the way to do so that once we do that then we'll be able to cope with a lot of these issues.
The Hadith About Collective Responsibility
One of the things that that really we need to understand there's there's a very beautiful scary hadith actually I mean Abu Bakr as-Siddiq when he said that the Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم - sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) stood up on the minbar and he said:
"Indeed, Allah will not change the condition of a people until they change what is in themselves."
The concept here is that when evil spreads among people and they don't change it collectively then all of them are eventually touched by that evil so the disconnect that we had in this in the West from what people are going through around the Muslim world I think was a very unhealthy disconnect to sort of just you know add to what what what Murtasim is saying that you know look it's you know we were living very comfortable and this is all there's always been some element of that in our ummah's history you know.
Historical Parallels: The Lesson of Andalus
Andalus was disconnected from the Muslim world when it was going through absolute havoc and chaos and in a way it created an insensitivity and a disassociation just a natural disassociation because no one could relate to the circumstances so for me I mean when you talk about look in the past I say look at the present look at what people are suffering in the present for their deen I mean I I've seen it with my own family members I've seen it in Palestine we know what people go through in Palestine we know that these people have to go to the masajid as rockets are falling upon them we know what they go through in Syria we know what they go through in Egypt we know what they go through in in the Central African Republic we know what they go through in Bangladesh one of the forgotten conflicts yeah we know we know what people go through to hold on to their deen in different parts of the world till today till now.
Learning from the Prophets: The Example of Musa
And so to me I can I can look at that I don't need to look in the past even though it's always helpful you never stop looking in the past the Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم - sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) he used to when when he was being harmed he said:
(Sahih Bukhari 3150, Sahih Muslim 1062)
"May Allah have mercy on my brother Musa. He was struck with more than this and he had patience."
So if the Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم - sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) was in his circumstances still looking back at Musa (عليه السلام - alayhis salam) and gaining inspiration from that that means something so you never stop dwelling on the lesson the lessons of the past or the present or the people around you but the way that I look at it and you know I look at it in a very optimistic sense I really don't think all is lost I don't think all is doom and gloom and look I'm in Texas I've got armed protesters in front of my you know it's it's it's pretty it's pretty rough in Dallas compared to the rest of America and I'm not complaining about it what I'm saying is I still see khair even in that.
The Benefits of Adversity: Unity and Action
And you know I'll tell you what it is more than anything else adversity forces us to unite and to start getting smart about our institutions and our political activism and how we're going to act as a community because when you're too comfortable you're idle and we were way too comfortable and the response was always just go under the radar just weather the storm the election year will pass the election year will pass but what we're seeing is that with each and every single coming election year and with each and every single candidate the rhetoric is only increasing and increasing and increasing and so isolationism is not going to work you can't isolate yourself anymore as a community and have your masajid looking like fortresses you know behind these yeah we were very good doing that.
The Importance of Interfaith Engagement
I'll tell you something interesting you know because I'm going back to Sheikh Mokhtar you know what I've noticed very early on he had a lot of interfaith dialogue and programming I mean we would go to the synagogue we would go to churches and Sheikh Mokhtar would be speaking there when I moved to Baltimore to our main masjid I won't name the masjid the first time that they invited a non-muslim group into the masjid was after 9-11 and I was shocked reaction yeah look have you been living under a rock I mean you're always going to have critics on everything but this is just basics you live in this country these are your neighbors right I work with the Christians Jews Hindus Orthodox Jews I work with everyone and so we establish a relationship with each other they get to know me to get to know my family right and they say hey that Muslim individual worker he's a nice guy right.
Personal Interactions Matter
I actually had my manager came to me and it's very active in his church and he said to me you know he lives sort of in this rural part of Maryland and he said you know I really wished that some of my Christian friends could meet you because the stuff they say about Muslims are crazy and he goes you know what I tell them I tell them that the Muslim guy that I work with is a hundred times better than all of you and I'm just like you have to have human on human interact it's all and see and that's the thing people don't realize is that when we allow ourselves to be dehumanized by not being active in our context that's leading to a morally bankrupt foreign policy it's leading to all types of things because if you're dehumanized at home you'll be dehumanized abroad as well so when you hear about 30 people dying in a drone strike in Yemen it doesn't affect the average American because they've never met a Muslim and so interfaith dialogue is very surface level yeah but it's a nice start somewhere it's got to start right and we got to familiarize our massage but it's like just the human interaction the human element your your message of your community being involved in the greater in the greater society.
The Problem of Isolation vs. Assimilation
How many Muslims do you think actually interact with very few because the idea was so you've got like you've got the assimilationist and you've got the isolationist and then you got the in-between and the assimilationist make the isolationist more paranoid it's like if we if we come out of isolationism then we're gonna become like this and then so let's not even go to the middle because the middle is inevitable we're gonna lose our identity altogether so don't talk to the kuffar stay away from the kuffar don't go to the non-muslim friends did and then you know you can only hold them up in Islamic school for so long what I've noticed when I go to Islamic school fundraisers you know now I tell him I say look I'm not gonna come to your Islamic school fundraiser if your main pitch is gonna be you know at least we're not public school right like at least it's not Donald Trump it's the same thing right we'll just go for it we'll go with Ted Cruz because he's not Donald Trump it's like come to us because this way your kids won't live amongst the non-believers that's that's such a pitiful pathetic defeated insecure call to me and I think the children
will grow up also with this sort of dual identity like who am I like I see it so you know I work in Baltimore and there's woodlawn high schools not far from where I work and I see some of these young Muslim people coming out there at 3 p.m. and you know they're wearing their traditional Muslim dress and young man and I see the situation that they're in and I'm just thinking to myself like what are these young guys going through in woodlawn high you know what sort of identity are they sort of carving for themselves at the high school and there's a lot of them doing it and I know that it's culturally put upon them by their parents you know so this is a challenge yeah.
Reasons for Optimism in America
And so here's the thing though that do it do I see hope do I see optimism I do like a look in the same environment that I don't want to get too politically here but the same environment that's giving birth to a Donald Trump is giving birth to a Bernie Sanders as well that America's in a battle for its character right now it's trying to figure out its direction and they're you know very paranoid white supremacists that grew up here in the 60s and whose formative years were in the 60s and 70s that are seeing America get more and more diverse and this is their this is their last clawing because in 2040 you're just gonna have a bunch of mixed kids walking around so whether it's the Muslims or if it's if it's you know a resurgence and a racism that never died towards the african-american community but just enhanced police brutality and it's it's the last attempt for me it's like that it's it's the dying white supremacist machine clawing one more time but I think it's going down like I think we're I think we'll be fine (إن شاء الله - insha'Allah) on this country.
The Need for Confident Contribution
And I'll tell you the main thing that bothers me with the Muslim community and I want to you know I'm gonna just we need to preach we need to tell our Muslim community that look don't just seek to be accepted you have something to contribute absolutely your deen is not just you don't want people to just come away with saying okay you're not all bad and your religion is not all bad and okay fine you can be a Muslim American yeah we have something to give back like when Malcolm (رحمه الله - rahimahullah) came back from Hajj he didn't just say that it solved racism for him he said Islam has a solution for racism in America that's confidence that's like what I have is not just good for me like by the way this is this religion that I have is still good for you the day I was still has to live on yeah so we have to be confident and secure enough to where we're not just like okay you know hopefully they'll accept us but hopefully you know if we put on our American flags and we stop talking about foreign policy and succumb to our 21st century McCarthyism where if you talk about Palestine or if you talk about BDS you're anti-semitic and if you talk about America's foreign policy then you're un-American no no no we're gonna talk about it right we're gonna be angry about it too and we're gonna teach people how to be angry about it in a productive way which is a natural counter radicalizing counter radicalization method but don't expect us to just be quiet about things we will be an active voice.
Dealing with Armed Protesters: A Community Response
I'll tell you something that happened in our community this last week so we've had our armed protesters in front of our masajid and most of the people from an immigrant mindset and this is not an insult to immigrants or to immigrant Muslims even just naturally when someone has come from another country they're not going to feel that this is you know there's always that level of fear that's there right and it's not just something that's with the Muslim community it's with the immigrant community as a whole it's hide hide hide duck duck duck divert divert divert just get it get away from it let's not let's not talk to anybody let's not pursue anything let's just be quiet and hope they go away so this this armed group has been harassing the Muslim community over and over and over again right and a few of us actually confronted them okay and they they actually sent our home addresses out to the public so I sent them a legal letter threatening a lawsuit I actually had a chance to sit with one of the members of that or over that organization and how that I was able to deprogram him over like five hours right and the main thing that we have to understand is that these hate groups when they see fear they thrive on it.
The Nation of Islam Response: A Different Approach
Now they they made the mistake of messing with the Nation of Islam last week so they said we're gonna come protest in front of the Nation of Islam last week you know what the Nation of Islam did they came out with their guns and they stood in front of their masjid the Black Panthers in the Nation of Islam they stood in front of their masjid and they said we're waiting for you and they never showed up but I'm saying that but the point it's not even it's not even that I'm saying that that's the right course of action I'm saying look at the difference you've got you've got one one group of just just no we don't want to even talk we don't want we're just gonna let it go and yeah we're not gonna we're just gonna keep on being scared and we're gonna keep on playing the victim card and you've got another group that obviously you know literally you know held guns and I'm not suggesting that we do that but what I'm saying is these people are they were afraid of that right they back down after that.
Finding Balance: Justice and Mercy
So there is we always have to find this balance in our religion between justice and mercy and the most balanced definition that I find between (عدل - adl) is that mercy is always the encouraged standard I did justice has to be the standard that's established and you should put people in a situation where they have the choice whether or not to show (رحمة - rahma) or (إحسان - ihsan) or not so you should not tolerate injustice towards your community or to any other community if we are active advocates for other communities that are suffering from injustice then we will find that those communities will also be advocates for us as well.
Solidarity with Other Communities
I just want to interject something on this happened this weekend because we always see things from the Muslim lens you know what is this comments of Donald Trump doing to us I was in the restaurant downstairs with the family a couple families and the woman that was serving us was so kind and gentle
Trusting in Allah: The Source of Inner Strength
But ultimately this this aspect that she's speaking of just being رجال and not being afraid yes we should as a community and I think a key ingredient to it is just having that connection with Allah right you see Sayyidina Lut عليه السلام right he says:
"If only I had against you some power or could take refuge in some strong support."
You know in his home that you know people were coming now to try to do what they wanted to do and he was looking for something to lean on some sort of strength we had a law with him so if you have a law with you in your heart you just have this strength there that you know that ultimately Allah's in charge nothing nothing can happen so they can't hurt you except by nothing will happen to us except what Allah has decreed and if you have that in your heart everything will be okay then take it all on.
Building Alliances Against Bigotry
So one thing as well here look and this is our path forward as a Muslim community overall and I and I see the light I see that more young Muslims are becoming conscious about this is joining the general fight against bigotry in this in this society just sort of becoming part of this alliance our own head for food if you were our own alliance against bigotry joining hands with other groups in this in this in this society like-minded individuals that want to see a tolerant and diverse America which is inevitable anyway in that way and it's not just for PR purposes it's because who it's who we're supposed to be.
Avoiding Stereotypes: The Quranic Teaching
And I tell people this all the time we are guilty we're just as guilty of stereotyping non-muslims as yeah as the Islamophobes are of stereotyping us Allah says:
"They are not all the same."
And when you just say the kuffar want this that the non-believers are doing this to you and this is the inevitable war between Muslims and non-muslims you are stereotyping them and it's not fair and the
Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم teaches us something very very very different with his life style so just like it was non-believers that put him in the boycott it was non-believers that ended the boycott the allies from Banu Hashim and others came forth and said this is not acceptable they're all non-muslims that are have playing this out but guess what no one likes a bully right unless they're bullies themselves and especially not bullying good people you know that so non-muslims rose up in defense of the Muslims and that in the time of the boycott when this was taking place.
The Prophet's Recognition of Good in Others
So you don't stereotype the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم in Badr and Uhud he always recognized he says and in the Battle of Badr he says:
"If there's any good in these people, it's in the one that's riding the Red Camel." (referring to Umayyah ibn Khalaf)
And he said that Ubayy I can tell he didn't want to really be there and he said there are some people some people are there from and better that are fighting against us they're just they were forced into it was peer pressure they just kind of felt like they would be called cowards if they didn't come out but they're really not there to fight so the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said don't don't go after those people he recognized even in those most and on the battlefield even I mean if he's saying:
"O Allah, forgive my people for they do not know." (Sahih Bukhari 3477, Sahih Muslim 1792)
They don't know any better in Uhud they know him صلى الله عليه وسلم they've met him they know they've seen his beautiful face they've seen his beautiful smile and they knock his teeth out and the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم is saying they don't know any better so what about people that have never met him and they've only met our very poor representation of who he was عليه الصلاة والسلام
Having Good Opinion of Others
So our hearts have to be big enough to to there's حسن ظن بالمسلمين that we have حسن ظن we expect well of each other and there is a level of حسن ظن in non-muslims as well seeing good in non-muslims as well. The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said:
"Whoever says the people are hopeless, he is the most hopeless of them all." (Sahih Muslim 2623)
So there's حسن ظن in that non-muslim as well that maybe he just doesn't know any better let me teach him but at this we've got to look for the khair so we've got to establish justice simultaneously not
vengeance so we should not be calling for people's jobs to be lost or calling for people's heads or calling for for people to be harmed no we want to avert harm from ourselves as a community and from other communities we don't want vengeance but we do want to establish justice we're not going to tolerate injustice for ourselves and in the process I'm gonna continue to try to find khair in that person and know that Allah سبحانه وتعالى has put a level of good in everyone and I'm gonna work on that I'm gonna try to magnify that and try to grow that exponentially because I've seen it all of us have seen it with people.
Finding Good in Ourselves First
Starts by finding it in each other too. Yeah. It's a difficulty we have.
Finding good in ourselves you've got to find it in ourselves. Sheikh Mukhtar said something at the last prose that I have carried with me سبحان الله since the last prose it was the last session of the last prose and he gave the example of Ta'if and he said the reason why the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم was able to not feel such a great hatred and vengeance towards those people in front of him was because he wasn't seeing them he was only seeing them as an instrument for Allah سبحانه وتعالى trying to derive something from him so he was seeing Allah with his heart he wasn't seeing those people with his eyes so I don't look at them with hatred because I know that Allah put you in my path for a reason and Allah desires something from me Allah سبحانه وتعالى wants something from me out of this and I'm so engaged in what does Allah want from me:
"What does Allah want from me?"
What does Allah want from me through this that I'm not I'm too busy to engulf myself in hatred for you so that's that's so beautiful that was his last session last year since then it has it has it has that that message really struck a chord with me because in Texas man we've been going through some stuff and we see that and I'm looking at them I'm like you know they're not all bad yeah they just don't know any better.
Personal Story of Transformation
And I took I literally had a chance five hours just talked to this one guy the first three hours were just you know back and forth whatever it is I let him get it all out he believed that all Syrian refugees are terrorists and they're all ISIS affiliated and they're engaging in civilization jihad I took him to meet a Syrian refugee family and he literally he literally he's on camera saying this he said I feel like a butthole hey man you got it it's human interaction right it has to have it has to have to happen he saw he saw I said look there's a little girl we have a little girl in Dallas this is what we all need to be doing.
The Power of Human Interaction
I go around I meet all my neighbors you know I invited some of my friends Muslims from the masjid for dinner and I invited some of my non-muslim neighbors and my Muslim friends as if they didn't know how to interact with them it was awkward it was so awkward I'm like he is human he eats he drinks yes but the conversations you have the coffee one of my friends he called me said well that was awkward I said no you're off suddenly you don't know how to interact with non-muslims it is weird it is really weird when when they come into our element right they come into our masjid it's like oh my god what are we gonna do what do we say you know you know the the Chinese and the Americans how they it was sports diplomacy right they broke their standoff by inviting each other's ping-pong teams okay 70s to play with each other right to play ping-pong with one another and yeah it was a communist regime and it was Nixon over here so it wasn't much better but it broke it broke the standoff because at the end of the day human interaction is so powerful absolutely that there's no way that hate can persist you know or be perpetuated it can't get worse and it can only get better with human interaction.
America's Future: Reasons for Hope
And like I said look America is we're gonna be fine إن شاء الله other groups have been through it it's becoming more diverse and there's this is the last attempt for for the racists the racists in this country to try to salvage you know this a nation that existed before so we're not you know as long as we just stick it through we'll be okay and we need to stop teaching our communities to be scared stop teaching them to be afraid we need to stop selling them fear like you know we're not going anywhere man you know that's we keep saying if Trump becomes president we'll move to Canada or whatever it is or Trudeau is pretty awesome but we're not going to Canada we're gonna we're gonna stay and invite and you know by the way it's also something that we need to pay attention to when Muslims politically organize they can have a voice and we're seeing that in this cycle Michigan Muslim community won Bernie Sanders Michigan and said they handed it to him and look at where look at how his tone was after that when the Muslims organize effectively they can do some stuff they can they can they can have a voice collectively you know we're starting to get there we do and we've got to organize.
Unity Among Muslim Organizations
And wouldn't you agree that there's been more unity amongst Muslim organizations and imams in the last two years than like the last 20 years like okay like guys they're gonna come they're coming after us as a community they don't really care if you're Sufi or Salafi or Ikhwani they just know that you're Muslim or you look Muslim you're Sikh and you look Muslim you've got to figure this out now this is not this is not healthy for you as a community you need to do something absolutely.
The Parable of Unity
My father-in-law gives this example he says when we were in Sunday school the imam whose daughter I married he literally did this activity he bought he gave us a bunch of branches he said everyone break the
branch right and each one of us thought that we were you know we thought it was just a competition of strength so break the branch break the branch then he gathered all those twigs together and he said all right who can break them all the same time and no one could do it and he used that as an example to us of how it's a very but the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم used to love it I'm thought he used to love these examples and parables and right that that to me was visuals like you know that's what it is we're just a bunch of twigs but if we come together even if we're two million three million that that two million three million can make some noise in this country in a positive way and they can do something in this country so we're going that direction we're definitely going that direction we've got to believe in ourselves we've got to believe in the deen we've got a more than more than anything we've got to have that spiritual reservoir that that you know Martha sums talking about that you can kind of lean back on like it's gonna be okay you'll be fine إن شاء الله
The Reality of Bigotry
I mean it's and let's face it the problem of bigotry I mean I think it was Imam Zaid that made it that made a comment one time in passing it as a joke in it and you know he said you know he was wearing like his uh what it would he usually wears right is his chemise and his kufi and whatever it is and and you know he got pulled over at TSA and he was like I'm sorry we keep on making you uncomfortable you know and he said it sarcastically but but the issue but it's really serious that a person who's a bigot they have the disease in their hearts and we can't you know what how much of our identity are we gonna give up we're gonna bleach our skin color as well so that all of us were sorry for making you racist uncomfortable no we're gonna keep making them uncomfortable because that's where America is going but we can show them a sign in our in our character and our actions and our attitudes but you know sisters being told to take off their hijabs I think that's just it's irresponsible it's irresponsible just take off your hijabs now can we actually even say statistically that women who wear hijab are being attacked more than women who don't wear hijab no we can't we need to stop being paranoid so take your your measures so if you will feel more comfortable wearing your hoodie whatever it is in some places that's fine but don't take off your hijab you know and brothers as well wear your kufis.
Visible Muslim Identity
I'm serious we're الحمدلله since Imam Zaid made that call for men to wear kufis in Saudi Arabia I've been wearing my kufi to the airport every single time every time I go in public unless it's a baseball cap because I'm going to the park or something like that I wear my kufi and the reason being is that we need to also kind of be visibly visibly Muslim a little bit you know just kind of show hey we're we're going to we're here right and we're not going anywhere and that confidence should come along with a smile and a hi how are you and holding the door and not being abrasive but I'm here I'm visible I'm not gonna shy away from it but I'm not that bad right and so that's the message that that we need to be giving to our community otherwise it's just detrimental.
Learning from Other Communities
And if you know I I mentioned I did a video when the whole after San Bernardino I've been talking too much off we're just happy to be with you and one of the things that I mentioned it really really affected me there was a Sikh that walked up to me and in the World Religions Council in Salt Lake City and he said to me he said I hope Islamophobia is making you better Muslims because it's making us better Sikhs because they're being attacked for looking Muslim and it's caused them to be more to insist more on their identity and to stick it out right and he's saying I hope you Muslims are also you're standing strong you know and tall and seeking that strength from Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَتَعَالَى - subhanahu wa ta'ala).
The Example of the AME Church
One of my close friends in Dallas is a is a pastor Michael Waters who's easily he's actually the pastor of the the Mother Emanuel Church the AME Church in Dallas man is a gem and we do active we do stuff all the time together and I just look at him and I see the way that he talks and I just see the confidence that they that his community has the vigilance that they had right after the terrorist attack in Charleston (سُبْحَانَ اللهِ - subhanallah) they were like they were like they were like we're going they all flew to Charleston went to church the next week and sat in that church and it was like we're still here and that and he said that that's the best response to terror that's the best response to that fear-mongering is to say we're still here so we're still here (إِنْ شَاءَ اللهُ - insha'Allah) we just need to make sure that our being here is productive like the Prophet's presence as productive in his society keeps our hearts together on the journey and that journey ends and being neighbors with I feel a sense of discomfort if you weren't going to be this is the one time that we get together I wouldn't miss it for the world I wouldn't even a red-eye flight from Seattle.