Quranic Healing For The Heart

Quranic Healing For The Heart

Ustadh Nouman Ali Khan | Friday 27th January 2017

Opening Duas

My Lord, expand for me my breast [with assurance] And ease for me my task And untie the knot from my tongue That they may understand my speech.

Our Lord, avert from us the punishment of Hell. Indeed, its punishment is ever adhering; Indeed, it is evil as a settlement and residence.

And those who spend [part of] the night to their Lord prostrating and standing.

Introduction

I've been coming here without telling anyone often. I conducted some social experiments here as well. I was here a few months ago to attend Jumu'ah. I was in the audience, kept a hoodie on so nobody would know who I was, and kept my head down to see if I would get caught. I actually survived the entire experience. The hospitality has been extended to me, and the overwhelming number of you that have come tonight is an indication of the love Allah has put between us. May Allah accept that love itself as an act of ibadah and only increase that between the Muslims.

The Passage from Surah Al-Furqan

What I wanted to share with you this evening is a passage of the Quran at the end of Surah Al-Furqan. This is the 25th surah of the Quran, a passage very near and dear to my heart. It's something I've talked about many times before, but every few years, I feel the need to go back and refresh my relationship with these ayahs.

Allah in this passage gives believers a special title: (وَعِبَادُ الرَّحْمٰنِ - wa'ibadur-rahman) - The slaves of the incredibly merciful. Believers can be called the slaves of Allah, simply the believers (الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا - alladhina amanu), or Muslims. We have many titles, but of all those titles, this special, unique title that Allah has chosen is wa'ibadur-rahman.

The Grammatical Significance

From a grammatical point of view, wa'ibadur-rahman is what they call in Arabic an-idhaafa - two words that are bonded with each other, grammatically fused. Nothing comes between the mudaf and its mudafilay; they're inseparable. Using this structure itself indicates a very close relationship between certain people and Allah.

The names of Allah each have certain connotations and bring about certain emotions. He could have said ibadullah (the slaves of Allah), but He chose in His wisdom to say ibadur-rahman. The relationship being described between us and Allah in this ayah is one of love, care and mercy.

Two Ways of Understanding

There are two distinct ways of looking at what's been said. One way is viewing this as a list of qualities where until you have all of them, you have failed. Another way, which is extremely plausible in the Arabic, is that each one describes a separate group of people. Each group has something in common - they're all believers - but we're not all the same.

The Groups of Ibadur-Rahman

First Group: The Humble

The slaves of the especially merciful are those who walk on the earth with humility. This doesn't mean walking with drooping shoulders. Humility means you don't treat people like they're less than you. You don't talk down to people. Whether you're at home, work, school, dealing with employees or employers, children or elders, parents or others, Muslims or non-Muslims - when you deal with people, there's a certain humility in how you deal with them. You don't make anybody feel worthless with your words, the way you look at them, or the way you carry yourself.

The Quran highlights different symptoms of arrogance. When there's disease inside, there are symptoms on the outside. The Quran describes how people stare at someone: يَكَادُ الَّذِينَ كَفَرُوا لَيُزْلِقُونَكَ بِأَبْصَارِهِمْ - "Those who disbelieve would almost make you slip with their eyes" (Quran 68:51). Their arrogance is just on their face, in their eyes.

Dealing with the Ignorant

When obnoxious people, when people that don't possess control talk to them, they say "Peace." Allah uses إذا (when), not إن (if) - letting us know there will be people who address us who won't be nice. You cannot avoid this unpleasant experience.

جاهل doesn't just mean ignorant. When Musa was asked about the cow and got upset, he immediately turned to Allah saying: أَعُوذُ بِاللَّهِ أَنْ أَكُونَ مِنَ الْجَاهِلِينَ - "I seek Allah's refuge from becoming among the jahilin" (Quran 2:67). He wasn't talking about ignorance but about losing control over emotions and temper.

قَالُوا سَلَامًا means several things:

• Their immediate response is peace
• They say farewell and leave in a dignified fashion
• They don't want conflict and insist on peaceful conversation
• When they respond, they are completely at peace and calm

Second Group: Night Worshippers

Those who spend their night before their master in sajda and standing. They pray in the middle of the night where nobody sees them. When you're humble before Allah at night, there's no chance of anybody else seeing you pray. There's nobody to impress except Allah. Your pride is gone.

Allah is teaching us something profound: if you want to strip yourself of pride, the first step is to see if you can get rid of your pride before people, then come before Allah. There are people who are great in worship yet really mean to people. It doesn't work that way.

Third Group: Those Who Fear Hell

Those who say: "Our Master, turn away from us the punishment of Jahannam. Indeed, its punishment is a huge penalty. Indeed, it is an evil place to stay temporarily and permanently."

These people make one dua: "Ya Allah, I don't want to go to hell." They recognize Jahannam as a horrible place and don't want to be there temporarily or permanently. Some Muslims developed the same disease as Banu Israel, thinking Allah will only punish for a few days. These people tell Allah they don't want Jahannam at all.

Breaking the Cycle of Sin

This group can stop the cycle where Shaytan promises you're missing out when you follow the halal path. الشَّيْطَانُ يَعِدُكُمُ الْفَقْرَ - "Shaytan promises you bankruptcy" (Quran 2:268). He constantly markets alternative products and ways of fulfilling yourself.

زَيَّنَ لَهُمُ الشَّيْطَانُ أَعْمَالَهُمْ - "Shaytan beautified their deeds to them" (Quran 16:63). You start justifying sins to yourself and listening to people who tell you it's not that bad. These special people can break this cycle and turn to Allah, recognizing they're done with the guilt cycle.

وَلَيْسَتِ التَّوْبَةُ لِلَّذِينَ يَعْمَلُونَ السَّيِّئَاتِ - "Repentance doesn't work for those who keep doing sins" (Quran 4:18). These people say "Ya Allah, I don't want to go to Jahannam" and genuinely stop.

Fourth Group: Balanced Spenders

Those who when they spend don't blow all their cash and aren't cheap either. They don't spend too much and don't spend too little - they have a balanced budget.

وَالَّذِينَ فِي أَمْوَالِهِمْ حَقٌّ مَّعْلُومٌ - "In their money there are rights that are known" (Quran 70:24). Your parents, children, siblings, spouse deserve financial support. When you become addicted to useless things and money keeps going to unnecessary purchases, or when you hold back from those who deserve, that's problematic.

Fifth Group: Those Who Avoid Major Sins

Those who don't call upon any other god besides Allah, don't kill anyone, and don't commit adultery. Three things together. This might seem basic, but for some people - think about Meccan society where shirk, murder, and zina were common for thousands of years - simply walking away from this criminal life to come to Allah is huge.

The Mercy of Repentance

Punishment will be doubled for such a person and they'll remain humiliated - except someone who repented, came to iman, and acted righteously.

"Those people - Allah will replace their sins with good deeds. And Allah has always been forgiving, merciful."

Even the worst of the worst - someone who committed shirk, murder, and adultery - if they repent sincerely, Allah will convert their mountains of sin into mountains of good deeds.

Regular Sinners

For regular sinners who didn't commit major crimes but missed fajr, did backbiting, or lost temper - Allah acknowledges their taubah too.

Sixth Group: Those Who Don't Witness Falsehood

Those who don't witness falsehood - they don't stand by when something wrong is happening, and they don't give false witness. When pressured to side with people who are wrong, they won't compromise their principles.

When they pass by gatherings where people talk nonsense, backbite, or waste time, they get out in a dignified fashion without making others feel bad.

Seventh Group: Those Who Heed Reminders

When they are reminded of their Rabb's ayaat, they don't fall upon them deaf and blind. They don't ignore reminders or take them lightly. When something hits their conscience, they don't pretend it wasn't about them. They let reminders impact and change them.

Eighth Group: Those Concerned About Family

Those who pray: "Our Master, grant us from our spouses and children the coolness of our eyes and make us leaders for the muttaqin."

قُرَّةَ أَعْيْنِ means two things:

1. "Ya Allah, everything else gives me stress, but when I come to my spouse and children, let me find my calm"
2. "Make me so in love with my family that I can't stop looking at them, make me content with what I have"

This requires work - fixing relationships with children and spouse doesn't happen overnight.

The Reward

Those people will be given high lofty palaces because of the patience they demonstrated. They'll be met with greetings and peace, remaining therein forever. What an amazing place to be temporarily and forever.

The Final Warning

"Say: What weight do you have before my Master if not for your calling upon Him? You have denied, so it will become permanent."

This ayah has several implications:

• What value do you have before Allah if not for the responsibility to call upon Him?
• The only reason disbelievers survive is because there are believers who still make istighfar
• Allah has no desire to punish - the crimes are so huge they need punishment
• Right now punishment is temporary and can be erased, but soon it will become permanent

Allah doesn't want to punish but offers: "Just come back to Me."

Q&A Session: Approaching Marriage in Islam

The Halal Way of Approaching Marriage

The Sahaba were simple people from a rebellious society who learned Islam gradually. They interacted with each other respectfully and dignifiedly. When someone liked someone else, they would say: "I like you, want to get married?" and if she agreed, they'd talk to her father.

For Parents

• Don't be more conservative than the Sahaba or more liberal than liberals
• When someone respectfully approaches your daughter, don't panic - investigate respectfully
• Create open communication with your daughters about marriage interests
• Don't force marriages - emotionally forced marriages are haram
• A girl must genuinely consent without family pressure
• Even on the nikah day, if she says no, respect that decision

Cultural Issues to Avoid

• Order of marriage: No requirement for older daughters to marry first
• Dowry (jahez): Islam commands the man to give mahr, not receive gifts
• Mahr obligations: Don't agree to mahr you can't afford or don't intend to pay
• Inter-cultural marriages: Acceptable between Muslims of different backgrounds
• Convert marriages: Don't question someone's shahada - that's between them and Allah

Making Marriage Easy

• Early marriage: Don't delay marriage unnecessarily for 28-30 year olds
• Financial responsibility: Men should earn decent livings and be dignified
• Balanced approach: Marriage is both spiritual and worldly - financial considerations are valid
• Parental guidance: Give sincere