Fear, Grief, and Insults
By Nouman Ali Khan | 2026-01-08T22:04:45.819433+00:00 | Topic: Trials
Fear, Grief, and Insults
Khutbah by Nouman Ali Khan
Opening Praise and Testimonies
All praise is due to Allah, to whom we praise, seek His help, and ask His forgiveness. We believe in Him and trust in Him. We seek refuge in Him from the evils of our souls and from the evils of our deeds.
Whom Allah guides, none can misguide him, and whom He misguides, none can guide him. We bear witness that there is no god but Allah, alone, with no partner. We bear witness that Muhammad is the servant of Allah and His Messenger.
Allah sent him with guidance and the religion of truth, so that he may make it manifest to the whole religion, and Allah is sufficient as a witness. May Allah send peace and blessings upon him. As for what follows, the hadith is the book of Allah, and the best gift is the gift of Muhammad, may Allah send peace and blessings upon him.
And indeed, the worst of matters are their innovations, and indeed, every innovation is an innovation, and every innovation is a misguidance, and every misguidance is in the Fire. Allah says in his noble book, after he says, I seek refuge in Allah from the accursed Satan:
"And recite to them the story of Ibrahim, when he said to his father and his people, 'What do you worship?'"
The Lord opens my heart and makes it easy for me, and my tongue becomes free from my bondage, so that my speech may be understood. O Allah, make us steadfast at the time of death, with no god but Allah.
O Allah, make us of those who believe, and do righteous deeds, and strive for the truth, and be steadfast with patience. Ameen. O Lord of the worlds.
The Recurring Promise: No Fear and No Grief
I have a lot of thoughts to share with you in today's khutbah, and I hope that you can bear with me, and insha'Allah follow along the thought process, that I think will lead to something beneficial for myself and all of you. The first thing I want to talk to you about is an ayah, unrelated to this khutbah, at least it seems that way in the beginning. It is a phrase that recurs in the Qur'an many times:
"No fear will they have, nor will they grieve."
In the exact words of Surah Al-Baqarah, Allah promised Adam and through him all of us: whoever follows my guidance when they come to this earth, then if they were to follow my guidance, then there's not gonna be any fear on them, nor will there be any grief.
The Relationship Between Emotions and Divine Guidance
So I wanna start this khutbah with these two emotions, fear and grief. And just mention some things about them that are very important for the subject matter at hand. What I wanna tell you is that actually when somebody follows the revelation of Allah, Allah's promises that they will not be overwhelmed with grief, nor with fear.
Both of those things are gonna be removed. But actually the converse is also true. When somebody is overwhelmed with fear, or somebody is overwhelmed with grief, then their view of revelation, their view of the guidance of Allah becomes skewed.
It becomes corrupted. Now what do I mean? When somebody is very scared, fear. When somebody is very, very scared, then they see something, some truth in the word of Allah.
They see something that Allah would want you to declare openly, but you're too afraid of the consequences. And out of fear you hide what you would say and would have bad consequences on you. You might lose your job for speaking the truth.
Somebody in your family might not wanna hear what you have to say, even though it's the truth. And even though it's the just thing to do, the right thing to do, you won't say it because of the fear of consequences. So people abandon guidance sometimes, in personal life, in personal decisions, because of fear.
The Problem of Grief and Anger
On the other hand though, is grief. And grief can transform slowly into anger and rage. You know somebody is sad in the beginning over something happened, and then it makes them angry.
And this is a common transition. Now with sadness and anger together, the thing to understand is, you wanna justify your anger. You wanna speak out against someone.
You wanna retaliate. And now you start using the religion, the Qur'an, the sunnah of the Prophet ﷺ, and you start cherry picking, picking out ayaat, picking out a hadith, that justify your anger. So on the one hand there is someone who holds back, and maybe only picks the ayaat and hadith that can maybe keep them safe, out of fear.
And they don't wanna talk about things that they consider dangerous. And on the other hand somebody says, I don't care, I'm going to justify my rage and my anger, and use the book of Allah for it. And these
are both abuses of the book of Allah.
The book of Allah is guidance for people who can control their anger, they can control their fear, they can control their sadness. These are just the first few introductory comments that I wanted you to think about, before we get into the subject matter today. And this is actually more about fear than it is about sadness today.
The Stories of the Prophets in Surah Ash-Shu'ara
The ayaat I wanna share with you are from surah al-Shu'ara, the 26th surah of the Qur'an. And there are several ayaat in which Allah talks to us about one Prophet, after another, after another, after another, alayhimu s-salatu wa s-salam. The surah begins with the longest discourse on Musa. It follows up by Ibrahim. I recited to you that in the beginning of the khutbah, in the Arabic portion of the khutbah:
Soon after that, the nation of Noah:
"The people of Noah denied the messengers."
And then Ad:
"Ad denied the messengers when their brother Hud said to them..."
Then Thamud and their brother Salih. Then Lut. And then finally Ashab al-Ayka, which is Shu'aib's people. Or the nation that he was supposed to give da'wah to, Shu'aib.
So Prophet after Prophet, after Prophet after Prophet. It starts with Musa, then Ibrahim, then Nuh, then Hud, then Salih, then Lut, then Shu'aib. And what I'll talk to you about first is, I'll skip the first two, which is Musa and Ibrahim. As for the rest of these prophets, you'll find that they said almost identical things.
The Identical Message of the Prophets
They said almost identical things. And especially when they introduced the message to their people, Allah literally repeats the words as they are from one prophet to another. This is remarkable, because these people are sometimes thousands of years apart.
They don't even speak the same language. They came to different cultures. They're not coming to the same nation.
And even though they are thousands of years apart, and cultures and languages and civilizations apart from each other, what they have to say on behalf of Allah is exactly the same. It's exactly the same. And one of the things that they said that is exactly the same is, now please listen to this carefully:
"And I do not ask you for it any payment. My payment is only from the Lord of the worlds."
I am not asking you for any compensation. I have no strings attached. I have no other vested interest in sharing this message with you. My compensation is the responsibility of the master of all peoples.
رَبِّ ٱلْعَـٰلَمِينَ - No one else.
The Courage to Speak Unpopular Truths
Now why are they talking about compensation? Because when you are giving a message, people question the reasons for which you're giving a message. And they say, perhaps this person is giving a message because he wants something in return.
But specifically what I wanna highlight in this khutbah, is what's related to fear. You have sometimes the message of Islam, you wanna talk about something in Islam, but it's not popular. It's not something that people wanna hear.
It might even be politically incorrect. But now that you've come to know that that's the truth, you hide it, or you don't speak out about it because you're afraid that maybe you won't be able to hold on to your job. Maybe your teacher is going to look down on you, and everybody in class will look towards you like, what did you just say? Is that even normal for you to say? What kind of person are you? What kind of extremist are you? You become the odd one out.
And out of fear of that, because there's the compensation. By the way, this is gonna tie in together really amazingly, because all of these prophets, you know what they did? The thing that is different about each of them? They each picked on something that their society was obsessed with. So when you talk about Shu'ayb, he talked about economic practices, that their society had made normal.
When you talk about Lut, he spoke out against the rampant shamelessness and homosexuality in that society. He spoke out against it, even it was the most popular thing of his time. He spoke out against it.
What I'm trying to get at is, these people spoke about things that will necessarily get them in trouble. It will get them in trouble if they open their mouth about it, but they did. And that in and of itself was proof that they're not interested in any sort of compensation.
They're not looking to save their skin. They're not looking to say something that, you know, people will feel good about it, but it won't touch any nerves. It won't bother, I don't wanna bother, I don't wanna
ruffle any feathers, you know.
That is actually what وَمَا أَسْأَلُكُمْ عَلَيْهِ مِنْ أَجْرٍ means. What it means is that, they're not afraid of the consequences of what they have to say.
The Problem of Speaking from Anger
But let me take you back again. I started with fear and grief. Today, there are people who say, I'm gonna speak the Haqq. I don't care.
we don't fear. For the sake of Allah, we don't fear the consequences of anyone who will put a finger on us. We will speak the truth as it is.
The only problem is, the guy doesn't understand the truth. He's speaking out of rage. That's actually not the truth.
He thinks he's being brave, by talking about what he thinks is Islam. But it's actually only his anger talking. It's not the book of Allah talking.
It's not the sunnah of the Prophet ﷺ talking. It is contaminated by somebody's anger and somebody's frustration. That is not the bravery we're talking about here.
On the other hand, you have someone who understands the truth but says, this is way too hard of a topic. We can't touch it right now. We should just keep our mouth shut.
Both of these are problems. And today, for the most part, you find both of these extremes. Somebody says, I'm gonna speak the haqq and what comes out of their mouth is far from the haqq.
It's mostly just their own frustrations imposed on to the sacred word of Allah. They can't look at it outside of their own grief. And if you dig a little bit deeper, all of their frustrations just start pouring out.
And you say, wait, I thought you studied the book of Allah. All it seems that you have a really good observation of is your own grievances. That's all there is underneath.
The Need for Emotional Control
So now we have to learn to put our fear and our grief aside. And then study Allah's word. And study what it is that we have to speak out about.
And learn to, and appreciate that when we do speak the truth, that it is going to be painful for much of the society to hear. It is not an easy thing to do. It is something necessarily that got the nicest.
These prophets, peace be upon them, are the nicest people. They are the kindest, softest people. They are the closest to Allah.
Their hearts are the softest in the remembrance of Allah. When someone's heart is soft with the remembrance of Allah, then their adab and their character, it permeates to their surroundings. These people's character is impeccable.
If you and I had the blessing of being in their company, you wouldn't want to leave their company. Our hearts would melt in their company. And yet, they have to speak up on things that will make people hate them.
Both of these things coexist. They're incredibly kind, soft-hearted people. And yet at the same time, they have to speak up for the truth.
That's what they have to do. But actually this was just the first half of my khutbah. By not even the subject of my khutbah.
The Exception: Musa and Ibrahim
The subject of my khutbah were the two prophets that I skipped. Now if you remember, the two prophets that I skipped are in the beginning of this surah. Those are the two prophets, Musa and Ibrahim. Of all the prophets that Allah talked about in this surah, two of these prophets, Allah did not mention:
"I'm not asking you for compensation."
Every prophet said it. My compensation is only with Allah. Every prophet said it. Except two of them. Musa didn't say it. And Ibrahim didn't say it.
The question arises, why not? Everything else is so identical. So consistent. You know, you have for Ibrahim:
"And recite to them the story of Ibrahim when he said to his father and his people, 'What do you worship?'"
And he criticized what they worship. But he never once said, I'm not asking you for any compensation. Now the question is, why not?
The Lesson from Musa: Acknowledging Good Even in Enemies
You know, in order to appreciate this incredible bit of nuance, so that this lesson sticks in my mind and yours. Sometimes we have to pay attention in the Qur'an to what Allah does say. Or what the prophets do say. And sometimes we have to pay attention to what they purposely did not say. They chose not to say some things here. That Allah deliberately highlighted about every other prophet.
Now those two once again are Musa and Ibrahim. Musa was raised in the palace. The palace of Fir'aun. And even after he had run away, because he was accused of murder. And he had run away. And then revelation came to him. And he finally came back. And he's squaring off against Fir'aun.
One of the most violent criminals in human history. One of the most arrogant human beings in human history. Actually the human embodiment of evil in the Qur'an is Fir'aun.
There is no greater villain in the Qur'an than Fir'aun. And he has to engage in debate with him. In this surah, this surah is actually the most aggressive debate between Musa and Fir'aun.
In the entire Qur'an, the debate is mentioned in multiple places. Nowhere is it more aggressive than Surah Ash-Shu'ara. This is the height of it.
And in the height of it, what Allah is teaching us is, Musa will not say, I'm not asking you for any money. You know why? I'm not asking you for compensation. Because he did.
Because he was raised there. He was funded. His upbringing was funded by Fir'aun. He was raised up as a prince. He lived under his housing. He ate the food that was paid for by Fir'aun.
As a matter of fact, when the debate happened, one of the first things Fir'aun threw in his face was:
"Did we not raise you among us as a child, and you remained among us for years of your life?"
Didn't we raise you as a newborn? You were a baby and we picked you up. You were nothing. We were the ones who raised you. Didn't you spend many years of your life living among us? We didn't ask you for rent. We didn't ask you to pay. He's not gonna bring it up because he knows.
That is a favor in fact Fir'aun did. And as a matter of fact, the Quran makes it a point to acknowledge that favor:
"And is this a favor of which you remind me?"
He says, that in fact is a favor that you did do on me. That you have a favor on me and I can't ignore it. And this great luxury actually. (تِلْكَ نِعْمَةٌ) That's just you know, (ذُلِكَ مَتَاعٌ نِعْمَةٌ) A luxury that you gave me. Convenience that you offered me. You gave me a good life. That is a favor I owe you.
That is in fact something you did for me. What are we learning? That even if you're debating the most harsh enemy, even if you're standing up against what you would consider the embodiment of evil, even they have done something good and you have to acknowledge it. You can't ignore it.
You can't dismiss it. Nobody is completely evil or completely good. As bad as Firaun is, there is something he did good. And it has to be acknowledged. And you can't dismiss it.
Applying This Principle in Our Lives
So the first thing, within the case of Ibrahim or in the case of Musa rather, is the acknowledgement of the good even in the one you're opposing.
This is extremely difficult. Especially when you're angry. Especially when you think you're speaking on behalf of Islam or truth or justice.
The one you're opposing, you see nothing in front of you except an enemy. You wanna crush them in any way you can. And actually giving them even some bit of appreciation might feel like, oh my God, I'm giving them ammunition.
They might be empowered. They might win this argument because I gave in a little bit. No.
When it comes to a good that comes to you, even if it comes from the enemy of Islam, you acknowledge it. Now think about this as a principle in life. I should and you should.
There are people we have disagreements with all the time. Family has disagreements. Husband and wife have disagreements. Parents and children have disagreements. Family has disagreements. Friends have disagreements.
And when we have these disagreements, all we remember are the bad of the people we're disagreeing with. The only stories, you remember what you said this? Remember when you said this? Remember when you did this? Remember when you did that? And you make a list of all the bad. If Musa can even see good in Fir'aun.
That's Fir'aun. This is your family. This is your brother. This is your wife. This is your child. You can see good in them.
And it's not a defeat if you acknowledge it. It's not humiliating for you to acknowledge it. It's evil of you to dismiss it. To not appreciate it. Even when you're engaged in argument. That's the principle we're being taught here.
I have to speak the truth. Yes, you do. But you can't speak that truth at the expense of the good. This is not something that you dismiss. You're not allowed to.
The Lesson from Ibrahim: Avoiding Hurtful Words
And then let's turn to the story of Ibrahim. Because that's the next case, right? It's Ibrahim. And he's not gonna bring up, I'm not asking you for money.
Because who was he talking to? He was not just talking to his nation. He was also talking to his father. And his father builds idols. His father is the source of shirk in that society. His father is the first one to kick him out. His father has done all of these things.
And yet, he's not going to be obnoxious. And turn to his dad and say, I'm not asking you for money, you know. Even though Ibrahim at that point may be independent. He's ready to leave the house. He's not gonna turn around and say, I don't need your money anymore. Because he's not gonna dismiss everything his father has done for him up until now.
You can't do that. You can't let your anger and even your stance for the sake of Allah. You cannot let that get you to the point where you say something that will hurt the feelings of the other.
Because you should speak the truth, but you shouldn't be looking to hurt. Because sometimes we say things in argument, the only point of it is to hurt someone. It's the only reason you're saying it.
There's actually no other reason. Like, you hurt me, now I'm gonna find some way of hurting you. And this is, in the first case, it was the acknowledgement of good.
In the second case, which may even be harder for us. Acknowledging good might, okay, I'll acknowledge some of your good, but then I'm gonna slap you around after that. Then I'm gonna throw some words at you that will take all of that acknowledgement away.
By the way, you're a good person, but you're also a shaytan. You're also a shaytan. That's what we do.
We'll acknowledge the good and then start to beat down. What are we learning from Ibrahim? Don't hold your tongue back. Don't say something you know will hurt. Don't be dismissive. Don't be dismissive of the good someone has done to you. Hold back from it.
The Golden Principles of Discourse
These are such golden principles of discourse. In the most intense, in the most aggressive situations in the Quran, this entire surah is debates. All of it.
One prophet debating his people, another debating his people, another debating his people, and whatever conflicts we have in our personal lives, there's no comparison between the prophets and their people, and the conflicts those were. There's no comparison. And if they can stick to these principles in that conflict, in that conflict, then there's no excuse for you and me.
Yes, we fail. Yes, I make mistakes, I get angry and I say things I regret later. But you know what? This is what this book is for.
This book is to bring us back to this guidance. These principles. These people live by principles. They had a code in how they engaged. And that's not just something for nations that came a long time ago, and
now they're gone. It's just fun history lessons.
These are things we have to live by today. These are things you have to live by, I have to live by.
Dealing with Provocations
There are going to be people that you talk to, that you engage in conversation with, and they will say things that hurt you. They'll say things that make you really upset. It boils your blood, boy, oh. And then you have things, you immediately come back with a response.
Oh yeah, you hurt me? Let me show you what hurt is (رَبِّ قَوْلِ أَشَدُّ مِنْ صَوْلٍ) The Arab says. He says, maybe sometimes words can give you a beat down more than an actual beat down.
Words can hurt more than a beating. So you think of a response. You think of how you're going to retaliate. You're going to hurt right back. But at that point just remember Ibrahim. At that point just remember that, you know, Fir'aun tried to press every button he could. He tried to provoke Musa. In every way he could.
Every way he could. But Musa kept his cool. Did not engage. Did not allow that to become a conversation. He did not say, what do you mean I'm not grateful? What do you mean I'm denying? I'm not saying you did anything wrong, but I mean you are a pretty bad guy. He didn't do that.
He didn't do that. He called him insane. He called him a liar. He called him a magician. He called him all kinds of names. But he kept his cool.
What are we learning? People that when you talk to someone and it's a conflict, when you're engaged in a conversation and somebody's angry, then they're going to say things. They're going to say things that are not true. They're going to say things that are not accurate.
They're going to say things in the heat of the moment. Just to get you fired up. Because they're hurt. So they want to make sure you're hurt. And you have to display your calm. You have to hold yourself back.
The Purpose of the Quran in Our Lives
Wallahi, it is those times. It is those times when the word of Allah comes to life in our life. You know, it's fine to have the argument with your wife, your husband.
It's fine to have the argument with your kids, yell and scream, and then come early to Jumu'ah and recite surah al-Shu'ara on your own. With proper tajweed. That's not what this book came for.
We made this relationship with this Qur'an artificial. This book came to guide you and me. This book came to give you wisdom. Give me wisdom. So I can live properly. So I can fix my relationships.
So I can conduct myself in a way that is pleasing to Allah. That can save me from trouble. Allah did not give us these guidelines because they're expected of angels.
This is possible for human beings. It's doable. Yes, we will fall. We will make mistakes. I will and you will. There's no doubt about it.
Allah did not give this book to angels. He gave it to human beings. He knows (اللهُ يَعْلَمُ مَنْ خَلَقَ - Allah knows who He created). He knows what He made. We will fall.
But you know what? This book is there to pick us up again. This book is there to fix us again. To revive us again. To restore joy in us again. That's what it's there for.
"That is a lightening from your Lord."
And even when the ahkam come, Allah says, this is there to lighten your burden. You will think when the hukam, the governance, the law from Allah comes, it should be a burden on you. And Allah describes as,
تَخْفِيفٌ مِّن رَّبِّكُمْ Lightening for you. Just take your load off.
The purpose of Allah's instruction is to take your load off. The further we get from this wisdom, this guidance in our lives, the heavier our own life becomes. The more miserable we become.
This is why when people come close to the book of Allah, Allah says:
"So in that let them rejoice; it is better than what they accumulate."
Because of that, they should be overjoyed. Because of the book of Allah, they should be overjoyed. It is better than anything else that they're gathering.
Learning from the Prophets' Family Struggles
Yes, you and I will engage in some pretty intense conversations to say the least. There are going to be arguments in our families. There are going to be arguments among friends. There are going to be arguments in business. Comes with life. Part of the territory.
I mean, the Qur'an talks about some of the greatest people that ever lived, doesn't it? It talks about prophets. And how many prophets have family problems? Well, Yaqub had no family problems. Yusuf had no family problems.
Nuh had no family problems. Rasulullah didn't have uncle problems. He didn't have. There was never any problem between him and the mother of the believers. They have problems? No, subhanallah. Allah is
telling us these narratives because Allah did not tell us about perfect lives where everything was glossy and good like a brochure.
Everybody's smiling and happy and there are no issues. No, no, no. Allah told us the stories of these prophets because they dealt with some of the toughest issues.
Because if they can handle it, they will become a role model for you how to handle it. For me how to handle it. That's why these stories are there. That's why these prophets are talked about. So may Allah make you and me better in the ethics, the morals, the principles with which we engage even when we disagree.
Closing Du'a
May Allah bring unity and harmony in our families. May Allah remove the ill feelings between spouses.
May Allah remove the ill feelings between parents and children and siblings. May Allah help us acknowledge the wrong in what we say and ask forgiveness for it. And may Allah give us and our families the ability to forgive one another.
All praise is due to Allah, and sufficient is He. And peace and blessings be upon His chosen servants, especially upon the best of them and the seal of the Prophets, Muhammad the Trustworthy, and upon his family and all his companions.
Allah says: "May He benefit me and you with the verses and wise remembrance, for me and for you in the wise Quran."