Fair & Balanced The Muslim Way by

Fair & Balanced: The Muslim Way

Speaker: Sheikh Mohammed Faqih

Opening Greetings and Introduction

السَّلَامُ عَلَيْكُمْ

Okay, are we doing live streaming? Are we doing live streaming? Okay, bismillah alhamdulillahi wasallatu wassalamu ala rasulillahi sallallahu alayhi wasallam.

This is one of these presentations of mine where I would like to get a bit philosophical and engage the audience inshallah ta'ala. Tonight what I wanted to touch upon was fairness, being fair and balanced in the life of the believer. Of course I can, we can sit and I can talk to you about the ayat and the hadith in which the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam teaches us you know moderation, you know to be fair, to be objective, you know the importance of these things.

We can discuss them and we can talk about different applications and all of that. But what I really wanted to do is and this is I believe this is actually is indeed my first session in 2019. I wanted this to be a little more engaging and for us to, I want to test myself and test you, see if we can have a more engaging discussion as opposed to a lecture or a presentation where I come and I just present something to you and you just take it and then at the end you ask me a few questions and I get away with answering them the way I want, right? But I wanted to actually for us to get a little deep into these concepts because when we talk about character or matters or issues that are related to character, one of the objectives is that we're seeking is we're seeking positive change, right? We're seeking to improve ourselves and maybe also impact or influence others to change.

And, yes, it's on? Okay, yeah, it's so, so yeah maybe we should have made, okay, yeah, sorry we were just talking about some technical things. Okay, going back to the to the subject. So we want to, if we want real change then we have to really not only accept something but we we have to buy into it, right? So there has to be a buy-in, it has to make sense, resonate with you, you have to really, you know, believe it, believe it to be true, relate to it, reconcile with it.

Most of these concepts anyways, you know, are things that we know but we just want, we're struggling to come to terms with them, right? Especially this particular subject, right? When it comes to fairness and justice, what is fair, what is just.

The Foundation: Love of Truth

So, so first of all, where does this come from, you know? I am, I'm a big fan of a book authored by a scholar from Sham, modern-day Syria. May Allah have mercy on him.

He left Syria a while back and he ended up in the eastern, western region of the Arabian Peninsula where he, rahmatullah alayhi, passed away, right? But he was a great mind, a great scholar and he wrote this beautiful book about the fundamentals of character in Islam, right? He wrote, it's a two volume book and, and in the book he talks about truth, like he talks about, you know, the, the principles or the foundations, the fundamentals of character. Like in Islam, where does, you know, having to tell the truth, speaking the truth and not lying, where does that come from? Where does it come from, right? So he identifies, he identified about principles from which these, these qualities or characteristics or values stem.

First Principle: Love and Commitment to Truth

And the first one to him is something that he refers to as (حُبُّ الْحَقِّ وَإِيثَارُهُ - hubbul-haqqi wa itharuhu) right? He says to love, to love and commit, can, can we say that? To commit to the truth, to commit to the truth and give preference to the truth.

So basically, and when you, when you read, when you read his explanation of how in Islam or a believer is supposed to uphold the truth, believe in the truth, love the truth, give preference to the truth. Truth has to be a priority, right?

The Example of Umar ibn al-Khattab

One of, one of the, you know, it makes you start analyzing yourself and people around you and how people behave. One of the greatest characters that we have in our history is Umar bin Khattab.

And, and as I was reading and I was analyzing, I realized that Umar, even before he became a Muslim, he had, he was committed to the truth. To what he perceived to be the truth, right? He was, he was fully committed to it. Therefore, when he finally, when it clicked, when he finally found Islam or realized that Islam is the truth, what happened to Umar? He wasn't like, okay, Islam is the truth.

Let me, let me think about it. Let me weigh my options. Let me see how I can transition into it.

Let me see, you know, what is at stake here. No, Umar as a person, his character, the way, you know, he was created, if you will, he was someone who, his commitment to the truth was so strong to what he believed that he was going to do it at any cost, by any means necessary, right? So as soon as he realized it's the truth, his prejudice and whatever was blinding him was removed. What happened to him? He instantaneously embraced Islam.

He actually wanted to do it on the spot, but he was led to the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم. When he went to the Prophet, peace be upon him, you know, he said, he came, and the Prophet said, isn't it about time for you, O son of al-Khattab, to accept Islam? And he said:

No conditions, nothing, no discussion, it's on the spot.

On the spot. The Prophet did not even, like he didn't come to the Prophet and say, Messenger of Allah or Muhammad, I am here trying to examine this.

I really feel inspired and all of that, so can we talk about this? No. As soon as the Prophet got up, when he came, they said that the companions were worried because Umar was known for his animosity. He was very open, and this is something that also distinguished him, you know, before he became Muslim.

He was very open, right? He thought, he believed, he thought that Islam was a false religion, that Muhammad basically, his message divided the community and caused rift between husband and wives, you know, parents and children and all of that, so he wanted to end this. On his way, he was told, he was redirected, he was told to go and check out, you know, the situation with his own sister. So when he went there, he found out that his own sister accepted Islam, not only his sister, but also his cousin, who was also his brother-in-law, his sister's husband, accepted Islam, and he confronted them, and they had a little, you know, that confrontation, and then, you know, he found that piece from the Qur'an that they were reading from, so he took it, and for the first time, he gave himself the chance to examine Islam, not based on his practice or based on what he heard and his preconceived, you know, notion, or for the first time, he's now examining, he's reading directly what God revealed to the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم. This is what Muhammad is bringing.

What is it? He was reading the first eight ayahs of Surah Taha. And by the time he finished that, he's like, it is the truth.

That's all it took, half a page of the Qur'an.

It is the truth. Muhammad is indeed who he claims to be. So he's like, I can't disagree with this.

So he's like, lead me to him. Where is he? So they took him to the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم The Prophet said, isn't it about time for you, Ibn al-Khattab, to accept the truth? He said:

No conditions, nothing, no discussion, it's on the spot.

The Connection Between Truth and Justice

So Umar had this great sense, you know, an attachment, admiration, he valued, he respected, he pursued, he preferred the truth. The truth, you know, when the compelling truth is presented to him, he will take it, even if it's against his own desires or whims or what he's used to. This was Umar.

This was a characteristic of Umar. Now, why am I saying this? Because Umar was one of the people that in our history, that whenever we talk about justice, right, like ruling with justice and being fair and being a just ruler, one of the examples that we give after the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم is who? One of the most profound examples is Umar, right? So where did that come from? Where did his sense of justice and his commitment to justice come from? My argument is it came from that, from him putting value to the truth. Truth is everything, right?

So then Shaykh Abdul Rahman Al-Maidani, rahimahullah, right, he moves forward and then he starts talking about other, you know, he talks about characteristics, speaking or telling the truth, being honest or being truthful in your expressions or in your statements, in your speech, right, in your conversations.

Where did that, where does that come from? Why do we struggle from that? If, so he traces it back to the, that original principle, right? Is the truth something that you admire and something that you truly, you are committed to and that you, you know, you pursue and you're willing to, to hold on to it and uphold it or not? That's a question that we need to ask ourselves.

Understanding Justice

Then after that he goes into justice and from, from justice, you know, from our sense of justice stems everything else. Now, so what is the definition of justice? What, what is your, your definition of justice? Up to what is our understanding or our, our understanding of justice? Okay, fair, to be fair, okay, unbiased.

These are various applications of justice, right? But what does justice mean to you when you hear the word justice? You know, we hear people saying it's a great buzzword nowadays, right? Social justice, justice warriors, you know, social justice warriors, right? What is justice? Right? We go to protests and people say, what do we want? Justice. When do we want it? Now. You know, sometimes it takes a while for justice to be, to be established, right? You can't just have it like that, but you know, but what does, what, what is it that people are seeking when they say, you know, assuming that the law is just unfair, right?

So you're saying a rule of law, but assuming that the, because if sometimes you can seek the rule of law or you want to apply the law, but the law itself may not be fair.

So, so is justice about establishing law or is law about establishing just bringing, restoring justice, right? Because to some people, the application of the law or the constitution is justice, you know, which was meant for, to, to achieve what? In my opinion, right? Law, laws and constitutions and, and, and, and, you know, penal codes and like that is meant to achieve or to restore justice, right? Bring back. So, so what is that justice that we're all seeking? Yes. Rights.

Defining Justice

That is great. So this is what he says, you know, he says, I mean, there are different definitions for justice. So he said, justice is, it's for me.

You should, next time you should bring for everyone. Everyone can get a drop in shallow or a sip. Oh, let's see.

Is this justice or not? I mean, this is, here's what he says in his definition. He says, justice is to give everyone or every individual what they're right or what belongs to them or what is equivalent to it. So, and the key word here is what? Their right or what belongs to them, right? So if someone is asking for something that doesn't belong to them or that is not of their right, is it just to give it to them? Okay.

All right. So this is one, one definition that he gives. Another definition that he gives is, it is, justice is to, to balance the action itself and what the right necessitates.

They must be consistent or they must be aligned. What does he mean by that? I'm just trying to roughly translate what he's saying. So he's saying is that if you have a right, right? The actions to, to my actions towards you or whatever, or whatever you do, whatever I do for you or whatever you do, right? With respect to that right of yours have to be consistent or have to be for the sake of restoring or fulfilling or maintaining that right of yours.

That's justice. Now, sometimes it may not achieve that. It may not, it may not happen.

However, not the attempt, but the actual application, the actual process took place. So though you may not end up having, having the, you know, what you were looking for, like physically you may not be able, but my actions and your actions were all consistent with, with, they were all, they were meant to restore or deliver that right to you. Now, if that right doesn't, doesn't happen for some reason, right? It, it perishes.

You perish before it's, you know, does this mean that, that justice was not, was not established? Yes or no? It wasn't established? No, it was established. Okay. So let's say I acknowledge like this phone is mine, right? I, I forgot it here.

You found it and then you realize it was mine and you were supposed to deliver it to me and you went out of your way to deliver it to me. What you're doing is the pursuit of restoring something, but in the process something happened to you or something happened to it that was out of your control, right? And I, I ended up losing the phone or the phone was destroyed and I didn't get it. Is this what you, you know, have you done your part in trying to, okay, right? So fairness or justice does not mean that I have to actually realize these, the pursued end results, right? Sometimes it doesn't happen.

That's not in our hand. You get, you get my point? So I have to be content that you tried your best. I can't say Abdullah didn't, you know, Abdullah, Abdullah, you know, if he didn't take it, if he left it where it was, right? He would have not, I would have still been able to, to, to, because Abdullah was trying to what? Deliver it to me.

You get my point or no? Are you in agreement? You can disagree with me, right? So did he wrong me? In any way? He didn't. He didn't. Now, sometimes we take to ourselves, but had he not, you know, bothered himself with it and left it there, maybe I would have been able to go and get it myself, right? I can't hold him responsible, right? For, because his intention was to deliver, to restore the right, though it didn't actually happen.

And he did his best to do it. And that's fair. Then it's just, I have no claim against him.

At least morally, you know, I don't know, legally, maybe I have. Whereas, whereas, or, or, right? Maybe legally I have, right? So this is, this is justice.

Justice is Not Always Equality

Now, then he goes into another, and then he goes into another very important concept that I want you all to listen to this.

All of this, by the way, is going to help us at the end understand how justice works in Islam. And it will help us reconcile with some of the issues that we may be struggling with when it comes to rights and duties and obligations. Men's rights, women's rights, parents' rights, children's rights.

You know, sometimes we're, then he said, we also have to keep in mind that justice is not about maintaining like two sides of a scale. It is sometimes, if there are two sides. Sometimes the scale may have multiple sides, not only two sides.

You could have four, right? There are four different, you know, and, and, and you have to balance them. Sometimes balancing doesn't mean that they all have to be even at the same level, right? Sometimes it means, right?

The Banana Bread Analogy

So, you know, an example that I like to give is sometimes you want to make the perfect, the perfect, my favorite, banana, banana bread, right? Or banana loaf bread or whatever, you know, right? You want to make. Now, is it, in order for you to have a perfect banana bread, do you basically bring all the ingredients and you make sure that you put the same amount of everything? Okay.

It's not the same amount of everything. It's the right amount of everything, right? That's what is going to give you the end result, the right amount of everything. Certain things you may put, put, you know, like there's a ratio that you have to maintain.

So the ratio could be one to two, one to three, two to three, two to four, right? Can someone come and say, oh, this is not right. This is not just, it should be one to one, two to two. No, right? Just keep, you see what I'm going with this? Do you see what I'm going with this? You see what I'm going with this? So because sometimes people have the idea that, that justice or fairness or balance means equality.

Not equity, not, not fairness, not balance, no, no, equality. Like it has to be even, it has to be the same, exactly. No, not necessarily.

Different components might require more of something or less of it. Different components may have more access, less access, you know, and so on and so forth.

The Source of Rights

Then the most important question is, okay, so where do these rights come from? Where, you know, how do you determine the right amount of, of flour versus the right number of bananas versus the right, how do you

determine, where does that come from? Expertise, experiment, right? So, so you think, you think someone was trying to make the, like the very first banana bread in the world, in the universe, in history.

Like someone was trying to make it and the first time it didn't come out right. They have to make, they have to, they had to make multiple attempts until they finally found the right, perfect balance or ingredient, ingredients and balance and then they, they wrote the recipe. Yes or no? Yeah, maybe, I don't know.

I don't think it came through divine message. Now, when it comes to, to, to, you know, cooking, yeah, of course you have to experiment, but when it comes to individuals, human beings and societies, how to govern a society or family, you know, where do you think these rights came from? Who determined those rights? Right?

The Creator as the Giver of Rights

Now, divine guidance tells us that the one to whom belongs all rights, the giver of rights, is who? Okay, now before we say that, why? The question is why? Why does it have to be Allah or the Creator?

There's a very important principle that we find in the Qur'an that we may sometimes recite and we don't reflect. Allah in the Qur'an says, it's, it's Allah:

To God belongs the creation, so does the commandment or the command. Right? To him belongs the creation, to him belongs what? The command or the, you know, the order. Another, another translation for the word amr is what? Order.

Like order also means what? Proper order of things, the way things are. Right? So to God belongs, and for, for very logical obvious reasons, if he created, then he knows he, he's the one that made it. And, and did God create things perfectly? I'm saying, like, I'm not saying are things perfect, but did he create things in balance and perfectly? Yes.

Right? When God created the universe, Allah Subhanahu wa ta'ala says:

He established everything. It was well calculated to the, to the, to the smallest of details. Some of you will be, you know, better explaining or understanding this than myself.

Right? And do we have any physicists here? Any physicists, any engineers, any chemists, right? Any biologists, any, they don't like to identify themselves? You know what I'm talking about, right?

So Allah Subhanahu wa ta'ala created things with a perfect balance for them to function and to fulfill their mission. And it's the same case, we're no different than the rest of the, of the cosmos. We're not, we're not any different as human beings.

Yeah, we're, we're the same as well. When Allah created us and made us and, right? And He also says:

Does He, meaning Allah, does He not know what He created, what He produced, what He made? He does. So who's, who is the, I don't want to say who's best.

Who is the only authority, the only one that can determine who has what right? Allah, right? And there is, and when Allah does that, He does it for, it's not random. It's not to please one segment or one group or, you know. It is actually for, there is a wisdom behind it.

Understanding Divine Wisdom

Now some, not, not sometimes, but we can obviously try to seek to understand the wisdom of God, knowing that we won't be able to fully comprehend or capture the wisdom of God because it's beyond us. There's nothing wrong with trying to pursue and be inspired by, by understanding the wisdom of God, right? Though it shouldn't be a condition to accept, you know, His infinite wisdom, subhanahu wa ta'ala. There is nothing wrong with that, right? There is nothing wrong with seeking to know, and there is nothing wrong with, you know, with investigating.

I just want you to, I'm not saying you should just accept it. All I'm saying is, well, you should accept it, but what I'm saying is, is there is nothing wrong, there is no, there is no contradiction between you accepting it, and as a matter of fact, if you accept it, and because you know it's there, you, you, you pursue it, right? If you don't, if you don't believe that it's there, why would you pursue something that, that is not there, right? So there is nothing wrong with, with doing that, but it shouldn't be a condition for you to submit, right?

Just like there are a lot of laws that we don't understand, we don't know, we still accept and submit to, right? Right? I mean, it's, khalas, I mean, everyone is getting their W-2 forms, right? Or your 1099, or whatever you're on, you're getting them. You're going to be filing for taxes, right? You, who, who understands or knows, you know, 10% of the, of the, of the tax code in this country? I'll be lying if I say I understand even 10% of it, right? You just hand it to someone who's going to do it, you're going to sign at the end, you accept, you know, that's it, khalas, right? You don't, because that's, right? And sometimes it doesn't make sense, but you just have to do it, you accept it.

Now, some of us may try, and you, you have absolute right to, to, to pursue, to understand where it came from, why is it this way, why is it that way, should you be supporting AOC or not, or her, you know, should you be supporting that or not, you know? Then you need to educate yourself, you need to be more, you need to know what, who's, who's AOC, is that you're asking? Alexandria Ocasio Cortez. Now, you know who, the congresswoman from New York, from the Bronx, mashallah, right? So, right? But, because I know some people, they're like, yeah, they're cheering, they're like, yeah, we want that, and they're like, they don't understand what it means. Do you know what she's asking for, what, what, what reform is she's trying to introduce, or she's, you know, calling for? They're like, I don't care, but she sounds, you know, okay.

So, anyways, so there's nothing wrong with trying to understand, as a matter of fact, it's something positive that you should, you should seek. However, do you, the question that you have to accept, ask yourself, do you

believe that the, that the one that has the right, not the right, the authority to give rights, and take rights, is the creator, right? That's a question you need to ask, answer it for yourself, right?

Justice in Islam: Meeting Divine Standards

So, now, then justice becomes what? Clear. Justice and balance in Islam means that we restore, or we balance things, to the best of our ability, by the way, because sometimes we won't be able, to the best of our ability, to meet divine standards.

Not earthly standards, not our standards, but divine standards. This is the key, the key concept or question, before we even start talking about what are the rights and obligations, and start, you know, doing a PowerPoint presentation, I wanted to make this point very clear, and I wanted us to kind of come, come to terms with it, right?

Practical Application: Financial Rights in Marriage

So, I'll give you an example, I'll give you an example. By the way, there are a lot of examples, so please don't ask me, why are you using this example? You know, you're not being fair, you're not being balanced, you need to give the counter, I'm just using a random example, so I hope that, one of the concepts that, let's say, that I deal with, that in the old days, maybe 20 years ago, I didn't deal with it, with it as much as I'm dealing with it now.

You know, maybe before that, you know, nobody, like 20 years ago or before that, nobody even questioned this, everybody accepted this. Now, in Islam, when a husband, when a couple get married, right? When a man marries a woman, in Islam, and that's the only, the only set up that we have. When a man marries a woman, the Sharia says that the man is obligated to do, to do what? What is the, you know, what's, what are the obligations? One of the obligations is basically the financial, right? So, I guess you guys took us to the financial, we're just gonna focus on the financial.

Okay, so, so the man has financial obligations. It all falls on who? The man. By virtue of being what? A male.

That's it. You can't call this, oh, this is discriminatory, this is sexist, why? But, you know, the man in the Sharia, divine law says that, it's in the Quran, it's backed by the prophetic tradition, the Quran says that the man has to offer his wife, right? And give her, and deliver, and fulfill a, you know, there's an obligation, something called mahr. It's a marriage, it's not dowry, it's a marriage gift.

Something that has monetary value. It could be, it could be a dollar, it could be a dime, it could be, it could be millions of dollars, right? Whatever the person can afford, whatever is agreed upon, you know, right? But once that amount is promised, it becomes her haqq. Does he have a right to it? Can, after, let's say a man basically gives his wife 50,000, let's say, which I don't think is reasonable, but if he can afford it, and if she's worth it, why not? Right? Let's say he gives her 50,000, he puts it in her bank account, or they open up, you know, does he have a right to it? What if he, if he loses all of his money and he's desperate? The sharia says, absolutely not.

Unless, unless, right? She willingly, she comes and says, you know what, here. That's what divine, divine, divine message says there. Now, what if, what if it's reversed, the other way around? He has 50,000 dollars in his bank account, and she's broke, she has nothing, and she needs some money.

Does he have to give her from that money? He does. Can she take it without his permission, if he says no? She can. Yes, she can, because she has access to it.

The Hadith of Hind bint Utbah

She can, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, when Hind bint Utbah asked him, she said, in, sorry, sorry men, some of you might come and say, oh my God, you're, you know, you have no idea, you know, maybe you should just go and report your credit cards lost. So, so when Hind bint Utbah came to him, and she said, she said to him, Abu, Abu Sufyan is cheap, and he's not giving me enough for me, for the household. So the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said to her, he gave her permission, can I take from him without telling him, without getting his permission, or do I have to give his, do I have to convince him? He said:

He said, take as much as you and your children need, but be reasonable, bil ma'ruf, don't, don't, you know. So he gave her permission to take as much as she needs, to take enough, what is, what is reasonable, what is equitable, you know, not take all of his money or half of his money and go on vacation and start, you know, spending and go and do some, you know, cosmetics, you know, surgeries and stuff like that. Obviously, he said, take it for whatever is necessary, whatever you really need, your basic needs, you know, if you need whatever for that, take.

So the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam gave her permission. Now, if someone was to put this in front of a judge or in front of any, does it, does it, does it look fair? Does it? But is it fair? Yes. Is it just? Yes.

Because why? Because the giver of rights said, right, the wife has a right to this, the husband doesn't have a right without permission. Is this clear? I know some of you are going to like me, some of you are going to hate me. I didn't, wallahi, intend, I did not plan this.

I wasn't planning this. I'm just going to say, you know, that doesn't mean that the woman, like a sister who is, mashaAllah, very wealthy and she hasn't, her husband needs something or that women shouldn't help their husbands. No, of course they should.

The Spiritual Dimension

And it's, it's, she gets blessed for doing that. And that's part of, like, you know, someone might say, is she morally obligated? Well, she, she's emotionally obligated, romantically obligated, you know? If she really loves and cares about her husband, of course she will do these things. These are, you know, nice gestures.

If, if we are obligated or if we are told to do this with total strangers, you know, how about someone who is, whom we have committed ourselves to? Of course she should do it. But the question here is, is she obligated?

Can she be forced? No. She can't.

So, and this is, this is what the giver of rights says. So we can't come to this and say, wait a minute, this is not balanced. This is not.

This is actually balanced. And Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala has his wisdom, his ultimate wisdom. So this is just an example that I wanted to give.

InshaAllah we will continue this discussion in my, in my next session. It will be more detailed. We're going to be talking about different areas, different applications, you know.

We're going to be talking about the applied version of this. It's a very important subject. But if you have any question regarding the principle itself, if you have any philosophical, you know, when we say philosophical, we're talking about, like, you know, if you have any, any, like, any, anything that is troubling you rationally about it, or theologically speaking, or philosophically speaking, please feel free, inshaAllah.

Yes. Feel very free, inshaAllah. Yes.

Questions and Answers

Question 1: Taking What the Law Gives vs What Sharia Allows

Question: Accept or demand? Ask for. Now that's a very good question. Now, okay, suppose that the justice system here grants you something that, that, that, that the Sharia doesn't.

The Sharia does not make it your haqq. Now the law of the land, you know, says that it's your right. You have a right to it.

It's yours. You can take it. You can claim it.

Now divine law says it's not your right. You have no, you have no right to it, and you shouldn't take it even if it's given to you. Which one takes precedence?

Answer: It all depends on the individual's sense of religiosity.

How committed are they? Do they really believe that there is a day where they will have to answer to Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala or not? Right? So, so there is a notion. This is very unfortunate. There is a notion that if the law gives you, if a judge, if you get a ruling, if the court basically rules, you know, to your advantage or gives you something, then it becomes halal.

No, not necessarily. It's not true. As a matter of fact, as a matter of fact, and listen to this carefully.

I may have said this in the past. If this is, if I'm repeating this, please bear with me. If the messenger of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala himself, and the messenger of Allah is, is the Prophet of Allah, he said, if I rule, if I give someone something that doesn't belong to them, right, then I am only cutting a piece of fire and handing it to them.

They can take it or leave it. And there is a context to that statement that the Prophet made. He said, I am a human being.

I judge based on the presented evidence. I don't know the hidden. I don't know the unseen.

I don't know all the circumstances. And some of you may be more capable of presenting or making a case for themselves. Some people are capable of making a case for themselves, right? They will be very convincing.

And I will rule based on that. However, the Prophet is saying that there is a margin, there is a chance for error. If I end up giving someone something that doesn't belong to them, in other words, meaning that God the Almighty did not give it to them as their right, just because they were able to prove it, to make a case for themselves, then they are not allowed to take it.

You are not allowed to take it. This is the messenger of God. So (من باب أولى - min baabi awlaa) anything or anyone else, then, you know.

So, we have to look at it. That's an obvious conflict between what divine message the Sharia says and what the judge says. Now, there is, however, there is a different angle to this.

Now, if the couple got married based on that understanding, like when they got married, they got married and they said, listen, we're going to get married according to California family, what is it called? California family law or code or whatever, right? So, we're getting married according to that. In case of any dispute or separation, we're going to settle it according to that system. And if that's the agreement and that's the understanding, then it becomes binding.

If that is the agreement and the understanding as well. Because sometimes people make certain agreements and they don't clearly understand what they're agreeing to. Now, there are certain agreements that, I mean, the Sharia is kind of flexible, but there are certain agreements that cannot be accepted.

Sharia-wise, they're not, what is a legal term for that? When a condition or a clause is not binding, but it's not legal. If it's, no, no, there's a word for it. Anyways, if it's not a valid condition, like the court will just throw it, will not accept it. Because to begin with, it's not, anyways. So, there are some kind of agreements that may not be binding, even if people agree to it because the Sharia doesn't accommodate it to begin with. But generally speaking, the Hadith says that you have to fulfill the terms of any agreement that you have.

Unless, again, the terms go clearly against what, like if the terms make something halal, haram, or something haram, halal. Let's say one of the terms is that when you die, let's say husband and wife agree that if any one of them dies, the surviving spouse takes everything. Where basically, the other heirs, the parents of the deceased spouse, or his children, or her children from a previous marriage, get nothing.

That is not a clause or a condition that would be accepted in Sharia. You can't. You can't do that.

Even if they agree on it, and if they approve it, and if they sign, even if they knew what they were, that is not something that can be, that would stand under Islamic rule.

Question 2: Using Courts to Seek Justice

Question: Or even from a Muslim. Or even from a Muslim, who wrongs you?

Answer: Of course, there are differences of opinion when it comes to using the court system, to even like going to seek judgment from the courts.

There are differences of opinion. I'm of the opinion that says you can. You can use, of course, it's always better to settle your disputes or your differences out of the court.

I mean, even the justice system here prefers that you don't come, right? But let's say you couldn't do that. You could not reach an agreement. You could not reconcile.

And now to seek justice, in order for you to have access to your right, you have to go and stand before a judge. That judge could be Muslim. It could be Hindu.

It could be Christian. It could be an atheist judge. But the judge is going to rule according to the law of the land.

And that is the only way you can achieve or you can get your right or some of it. Then are you allowed to pursue that? Of course, definitely. I'm of the opinion that you can.

Now, again, you're seeking your right or maybe some of it. However, if the judgment or if the process ends up giving you more than what is owed to you, more than your right, Islam, that's when Islam comes and says, you only take what belongs to you and you leave the rest. So if you know for sure, let's say someone took something that belongs to you and you were able to get a ruling and you were able to get something of a similar value, but it ends up being more than what was taken from you.

Then you owe that person the rest of it, the excess amount. Yes, yes. We forgive apologies.

Question 3: Forgiveness and Those Who Show No Remorse

Question: Yes, yes, yes. And I'm a big advocate of that. Yeah.

And not only that, but also that's also to seek what Allah Subh'anaHu Wa Ta-A'la has for you. Oh, you mean? They're not remorseful. They're not sorry.

They're not.

Answer: That's a very interesting question. Yeah, yeah.

And I truly believe that people somehow are going to somehow pay for their – whether they realize it or not. Whether they realize it or not. So you forgive them, you will be rewarded, you will be blessed.

You will be given contentment, inshallah ta'ala. You will be given better than what you have lost. Allah Subh'anaHu Wa Ta-A'la will compensate you.

But then what happens to them shouldn't be a concern of yours. But if we are wondering, yeah, it could very well be Allah Subh'anaHu Wa Ta-A'la will – and there are some terrifying stories that I can share with you, but I

don't want to.

May Allah forgive us.

But they could very well – Allah could forgive themselves to Allah Subh'anaHu Wa Ta-A'la. Allah could forgive them or punish them. Allah could punish them for their defiance, for their arrogance, for their – actually, if they're lucky enough, they will be humbled in this life.

They will experience something and they will be able – and if they're very, very fortunate, they will be able to connect the dots. They will be able to connect what happened to them to their offense and say, oh, my God, this is for what I have done to so-and-so ten years ago or twenty years ago. If they're fortunate enough.

That's - by the way, that's someone who is very fortunate. Yeah. It's good.

Question 4: The Right to Hold Grudges vs Forgiveness

Question: Yeah, I mean, you absolutely – you have the right to hold on to your grudges. You can hold on to your grudges and enjoy them for – yeah. Well, yeah, but what I'm saying, you have the right.

Answer: But if you – there's a difference between what you're entitled to and what you really want to do, right? If someone says, no, wait a minute, I am entitled to being a big person and having – have a big heart and a pure heart. I'm entitled to have a comfortable life. I'm entitled to going to bed with a pure heart and have to wear SO I'm entitled to all of that.

Why should I hold on to this, to this harmful piece of memory or something? I'm just going to get rid of it and I'm going to let go. I'm not going to pursue anything in this life. So it is, of course, right? I mean, I guess maybe the question that you're asking, is it even sane? Does it even make sense? Of course, it makes perfect sense.

It makes perfect sense for me to let go of something that will just harm me, and it's not going to do anything to the person that actually put me through that, right? It makes perfect sense. Spiritually speaking, intellectually speaking.

You can do either or.

I mean, you can do – There are different levels of forgiveness. By the way, this whole idea of saying forgive and forget, you're not obligated to forget. As a matter of fact, sometimes you don't want to forget.

There's a difference between – You need to learn from past experience. But there's a difference between me forgetting something, like actively trying to forget, and actively trying to remind myself of it. We are – Allah Subh'anaHu Wa Ta-A'la designed us in such a way where we do get over things and we forget and we heal.

There's nothing wrong with having a scar. But don't look at the scar and remind yourself of what happened. Don't relive that moment.

The wound healed. Don't look at the scar anymore. Just pretend like it doesn't exist.

But when you see it, say, Alhamdulillah, I survived that. Alhamdulillah, I healed. You don't have to relive the incident.

So nobody is saying that just get rid of – Maybe some people might tell you that you need to get rid of the scar. Do you have to? No, you don't have to. But you don't need to.

So that's one level of letting – forgiving. Sometimes you can – some people manage to completely forgive, like not only let go, but forgive. In other words, they may see the person that have done that to them and feel indebted to that person.

They're not like, oh, this person is lucky that I let them off the hook. When they see that person, they're like they have no ill feelings. They could experience that.

That's fine. You don't have – these are different levels of it. But nobody is saying that whether you let go or you forgive.

Let go means (تَرْكُ الْعُقُوبَةِ - tarku al-ʿuqubah) as they say. So basic – and that is called Afu, pardoning. Forgiveness means that you completely - you wipe.

You purge the offense. You can do either or, whichever you're capable of. That's fine.

I mean, no – and for both, you will be rewarded. Whether you let go, meaning you pardon the person while you still – the offense is still there. It's on record.

Or you forgive, meaning you take it out of your record. So you can do either or, whichever, whatever you're capable of.

I'm happy with you just letting go, not sweating it, the little things.

Question 5: Handing the Matter to Allah

Question: Yes? Yes. Sorry. By the way, sometimes that is much more – when you tell someone, I have handed this file over to Allah جل جلاله. My issue with you is now in the hands of Allah.

Answer: I'll let Allah جل جلاله deal with it. That is – I'd rather deal with you if I offended you. I'd rather deal with you, do whatever it takes to redeem myself than having to answer to Allah جل جلاله. Nokhalas.

Once you say, (حَسْبِيَ اللهُ وَنِعْمَ الْوَكِيلُ - hasbiya allahu wa ni'ma al-wakeel) you hand it over to Allah جل جلاله that means khalas. You left it up to Allah جل جلاله and that's it. You let go, and now you need to move on with your life.

Question 6: Abortion and the Day of Judgment

Question: Yes, Abdullah? Yes. Last question. Go ahead.

Yes. I know. And that's why, subhanAllah, when Allah جل جلاله spoke about infant size, killing infants, Allah جل جلاله says on the Day of Judgment:

وَإِذَا الْمَوْءُودَةُ سُئِلَتْ * بِأَيِّ ذَنْبٍ قُتِلَتْ

Reference: Quran 81:8-9

When the infant or when the child killed in their infancy is asked, usually, who's questioned? Who's interrogated or questioned? Who do you question? The perpetrator, right? The offender, the criminal, the person that committed, whoever is on trial.

Answer: On the Day of Judgment, (الله جل جلاله - Allah jalla jalaluhu), the victim is going to be brought, and will be cross-examined, or will be questioned, asked, for what crime were you killed? They have not committed any crime. And that will happen in front of the person that did that. So that's why it's a very, very, very critical decision.

If the life of a fetus is established, and there is, of course, a debate, between 80 to 120 days, but there is consensus after 120 days. There is consensus amongst the scholars that after 120 days, abortion is not allowed, except under severe circumstances and all of that. Except unless if, and only if, the pregnancy will, for sure, is a threat to the life of the mother.

Because after 120 days, you have a living being now. You have a human being. Not fully developed, but it's a human being.

It's a life. You can't take it. And if someone does that, if they say, well, it's my body, it's my right, it's not their right anymore.

So, yes, there will be questions. It's serious. Now, of course, the offense before and after birth is greater.

Meaning, after birth is murder. There has to be, there is a punishment for it. Before birth, it's a jinaya.

It's an offense. It's still a, you know. Again, it's not to lessen the gravity of it.

Because they have now haya mustaqilla. Now they have an independent life. They're independent.

They're breathing on their own and all that. If a child is born and they start breathing on their own, then anything done against them is... If it's done while I am their inside, like they're inside their mother, and a mother does it to them or someone else does it to them, they were not, you know, it was not done to them directly. They're still connected to the mother.

So it's like, it's like... By the way, someone might say, wait a minute, so you're saying that if a woman says, well, it's my body, I can do whatever I want with it. It's not true. In Islam, you know, a man or a woman cannot do whatever they want to their body.

Can you say, well, I don't like my pinky anymore. I'm going to chop it. I'm going to cut it out.

You can't do it. In Islam, it's haram. You can't do that.

Islam doesn't allow you to do that. No, not capital murder, like killing a person after they were born. That's capital.

Before 120 days, again, it's debatable, right? But there is a room if there is a need for it. If there is a need for it. But after 120 days, you can't do it for genetic reasons or whatever.

The only case that the scholars give is if maintaining that pregnancy threatens the mother. In other words, if she keeps the child and if she tries to give birth, she's going to die for sure. Then you sacrifice the fetus to preserve the mother.

Then you have two lives, right? You're going to lose one or the other.

Question 7: Making Amends When You Can't Reach the Person

Question: Yes. Part of their redemption is to there is something that they owe the victim or the family of the victim.

Answer: So they will have to. Yeah. They say, okay, scholars say that what if you offend someone, right? And you're sorry for offending them.

But they're nowhere. You can't find them. Maybe they passed away.

They're not around. Or you don't have access to them. You don't, right? Do you remember the person you bullied in fifth grade? Or you have... Alhamdulillah, we don't have any bullies here.

You've never bullied anyone, alhamdulillah. So now you want to redeem yourself. What do you do? Or let's say you have access to them.

But if you tell them, if you go and you tell them, let's say you have a good relationship with your mother-in-law, with your husband, with your sister, with your cousin. You have a good relationship. But you have done something to her or to him behind their back, right? And they suffered from it.

And now you want them to forgive you for what you have done. But they don't know it's you. What do you do? What do you do? If you go to them and you say, forgive me, and they're like, what for? And you tell them, this could completely destroy their relationship.

Maybe something that they got over or something like that. If you reveal what you have done to them, then it could actually destroy their relationship. Break the family, break the marriage.

God knows. So what do you do? Huh? So in that case, to preserve this relationship, you ask Allah for forgiveness and then you try to redeem yourself by doing something for them, praying for them, going out of your way to do something for them to compensate for what you have done. Does that make sense? So you try to redeem yourself in other ways.

And that's why we are always encouraged to ask Allah for forgiveness. And we're encouraged to pray for one another and to pray for those that we have offended. The Prophet himself said, if I have offended any one of you, please come and take your haqq.

And the Prophet said, oh Allah, if I have offended anyone, if I have done anything to anyone, if I have wronged anyone, forgive them and make whatever they have suffered because of me a source of rahmah and forgiveness for them. So the Prophet prayed that Allah blesses them. Of course, the Prophet didn't harm anyone.

But he himself was teaching us and he was being extra careful or he was being very sensitive. So he asked and begged Allah that in case he harmed anyone without knowing, right? Unintentionally, he prayed to Allah to make that a source of blessing and a source of comfort and a cause of what? A cause of mercy for them. To make that, you know, so in other words, to make it turn into something great for them.

And this is from the (خَصُوصِيَّاتِ - khusoosiyat) of the Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم - sallallahu alayhi wasallam)

Closing

(جَزَاكُمُ اللَّهُ خَيْرًا - Jazakum Allahu Khairan). Can we conclude and then we can have our side discussions inshallah so that those who need to leave for any reason they don't feel obligated.

(سُبْحَانَكَ اللَّهُمَّ وَبِحَمْدِكَ نَشْهَدُ أَنْ لَا إِلَهَ إِلَّا أَنْتَ نَسْتَغْفِرُكَ وَنَتُوبُ إِلَيْكَ - Subhanaka Allahumma wa bihamdika ash-hadu an la ilaha illa anta astaghfiruka wa atubu ilayk)

(السَّلَامُ عَلَيْكُمْ وَرَحْمَةُ اللَّهِ وَبَرَكَاتُهُ - Assalamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh)