What Are Your Priorities In Life - Bilal Assad

What Are Your Priorities in Life?

A Khutbah by Bilal Assad

Opening

(بِسْمِ اللَّهِ الرَّحْمَٰنِ الرَّحِيمِ - bismillahir-rahmanir-rahim)

Introduction

Brothers and sisters in Islam, what a great pleasure and honor and happiness it is for me to see you again. It is a delight for me, and may Allah accept our work and yours. Honestly, I am benefiting from you more than what you are benefiting from me. This experience for me will benefit me a lot going back to the people in Australia.

So please don't forget me and us and my colleagues and the Muslims in Australia and around the world, of course, from your du'a. Always make du'a for our success, and make your intentions good.

The Topic: What Are Your Priorities in Life?

Brothers and sisters in Islam, today's topic—our brothers have chosen the following title: What are your priorities in life? This question is extremely crucial. What are your priorities in life, or what is your priority in life?

Brothers and sisters in Islam, I would like this evening for you and I to think about this question deeply. Think about it properly. I'll tell you why.

Rasul ﷺ said:

(Sunan al-Tirmidhi)

"Hold yourself to accountability. Judge yourself before you are ultimately judged."

Before you are held accountable on the ultimate day. Rasul—the one who never speaks out of his own desire except that it's an inspiration sent down to him from above—said, "Judge yourself before you are judged." By

who? Before you are judged by the ultimate judge, Allah, on the day when He will make us stand whether we like it or not. The day when Ibrahim, peace be upon him, will fall to his knees on the ground and he will say:

"Oh Allah, give us peace. Give us peace."

On that day, when every messenger and prophet will run away from the responsibility of having to answer for us and will say, "I only have myself to worry about on that day."

The Importance of Self-Accountability

You will be judged. You will be questioned. You and I will be questioned about every single letter we utter. Yes, I know it is a burdening task. Yes, I know it creates a burden upon us right now. But a person who judges themselves is in a better position than anyone who neglects themselves.

Did you not hear the word of Allah in the Quran?

"They forgot Allah, so Allah made them forget themselves."

Allah says they forgot Allah by being distracted by other things other than Allah until what? Allah made them forget who they even are. Made them forget their own identity. Made them forget who you are and what is your purpose. Where are you heading?

This is something natural. This is something normal to occur. This is the effect. The cause is that we chose to forget Allah. Those who are those people who forgot, so the result of that naturally equals a person forgetting who they even are.

When you forget who you are, your heart becomes hardened. Your heart becomes darkened. And when our hearts become darkened, we become unhappy. When we become unhappy, we want to be happy. So when we meet people, what do we do? We act. We put on a show. We become into a state of riyaa', a form of hypocrisy, because a person wants to find happiness and they can't. So they look for other things to bring them happiness.

And the first thing they look for is worldly things that can bring them this happiness and dissatisfaction. Otherwise, they feel that they have no value whatsoever. And this cannot be achieved except with hypocrisy, and there is no truth to it.

Signs of Forgetting Yourself

These types of people lead on. What else? They start to lose their sight, their hearing. They start to lose themselves by going on to intoxications. A lot of them who we hear about, such as celebrities and the likes of them whom we see on television—we think that they are living the life. But what happens to them? Suddenly we hear about them committing suicide. We hear about them dying of drugs, of alcohol. We find them partying all night until they die. They party to death, these types of people.

We think they are living the life, and then we start to imitate them, thinking that this is where happiness comes from. But what actually happened here to these people, Muslim or non-Muslim? They have forgotten themselves.

My brothers and sisters in Islam, if I want to know whether Allah is my priority or not, then the first sign that appears on me is a sign which I only know by myself. No one can know it except me and Allah. Not my father, not my mother, not my brother or sister, not my friends, not my wife, not my children—only myself.

It is when I no longer know who I am. Have you ever felt like that? I hope you haven't, but there are many—there are a majority of people who forget who they are.

Examples of Not Knowing Who You Are

I'll give you an example. A person says, "I am a Christian," "I am a Jew," "I am a Hindu"—whatever they say they are. If you ask them the question, "Why are you of that particular religion?" The common response is this: "Oh, because my parents are. I was brought up that way."

Do you think this person knows who they really are? If I say to you, "I am a Muslim because my parents are Muslim," do I know who I am? Do I know why I'm a Muslim? Do I know what I'm meant to be doing? If I knew what I'm meant to be doing, do I believe in what I am doing? Or am I doing it to please my parents? Or am I doing it to please my culture, or my people that are looking at me, or the members in the masjid who see me going there? Am I doing it to just put on a show to my family?

The first sign of this hypocrisy is that when I'm alone, I have a different identity. When I am alone, I watch things which I don't watch in the day. When I am alone, I listen to things people don't know that I listen to. When I am alone, I am happy that no one is watching me because the first thing I want to do is to resort to the things which Allah hates. This is one of the other signs of a person who does not know who they are, or they think they are something but they are not─putting on the show.

So when you ask a person, "Why are you a Muslim?" I wonder how many people can give a proper answer. "Why have you grown your beard?" "Why do you wear hijab?" "Why do you pray?" I wonder what kind of answers we get.

On the outside, we can all find what we call politically correct answers—answers that are the proper answers that should be said. But who am I really? Do I fit the description which I am putting? When Allah says they forgot Allah, Allah made them forget themselves. I no longer know who I am. On the outside, I look like something, but on the inside, I'm completely something else.

The Sweetness of Iman

Listen to what the Prophet ﷺ said. Here is just an example of how a person knows who they are. He says:

"Whoever, for example, abandons looking at something which is forbidden, Allah will compensate that with a sweetness of the feeling of iman which they find inside of their heart."

The point of that hadith which I wanted to allude to is not the fact that a person stopped looking at haram—this is only one thing. What I'm trying to say is when a person stops any act which Allah hates, it means that that person is only wanting the pleasure of Allah in how they use their eyes, for example, or how they use their body, how they use their time. And as a result, the genuine sign of you being genuine in that—meaning that Allah is your objective by abstaining from this, by controlling yourself—the sign of this genuine love for Allah, making Him your priority, is that you will find a feeling of sweetness inside of your heart.

This sweetness—wallahi, if you give this person everything in the world, if you give them everything that any human desire would want, it will not make a difference in their sweetness that they feel inside their hearts.

When Was the Last Time You Felt the Sweetness of Iman?

Are you like me? When was the last time you felt the sweetness of iman? Was it last night? Is it now? Or was it a year ago? Ten years ago? When you were a child? When was the last time I felt this deep sweetness of iman where in the night I felt like waking up when everybody else was asleep, and I just felt this drive to make me stand alone in the dark with a tiny candle or a tiny light? I don't want anyone to see me. I don't care if anyone sees me or knows what I am doing. I just have this sweetness, this love to get up and pray to Allah, to speak to Him because I love Him. I feel the sweetness that doesn't leave my heart. It makes me give up my sleep because the sweetness of what I am doing is more beloved to me than my sleep.

When was the last time you or I felt this particular sweetness? Then not only that—as I was praying in the night, I don't know why, but I felt that my heart began to pound in such a way I've never felt before. It's not the pounding of a person with a heart attack. It's not the pounding of a person who has been exercising for so long. It's not the pounding of a person with a sickness. But the pounding of something called a sweetness that has

affected my eyes to water, and now I'm crying and I don't know why. The only thing I can say is there is a sweetness inside me that makes my tears flow out of consciousness and love and communication with Allah.

When was the last time you felt like that? I'll tell you when. It was the time when you felt that Allah is truly your only objective in your whole entire life.

Example of Disbelievers Turning to Allah

I'll give you an example of people who are far away from Allah when they feel this sweetness. Do you want to know where? I am going to talk about a kafir, a disbeliever, a fighter of Allah, a random disbeliever who knows the truth of Allah and rejects Him directly. I'm going to tell you at a time when he or she can find the sweetness and closeness to Allah when no other priority exists but the priority of Allah.

I'll tell you. It is mentioned in the Quran. Allah says—in one way, one way of the ways Allah speaks, because there are many verses about this—Allah speaks about disbelievers in the middle of the ocean on a ship.

Suddenly the waves begin to hit this arc, and suddenly the ship begins to sink. And the person who is on there is a disbeliever. How do I know, by the way? The verses end in the end.

Allah says in the Quran:

"And when the waves begin to rise above them, and they have no hope except Allah, and there is no way to escape it, and they know that they are going to die, they are going to sink, they are going to drown, and nothing can help them—Allah says suddenly they turn to Allah and they call upon Him with sincerity, fully from their heart. 'Oh Allah, if You were to save us, we will be among the believers. We will be among those who will please You. We will be among those who will be the first to do good work.' "

Allah says in the Quran:

"But when Allah saves them to land, to security, to safety, where they feel that they are now safe, some of them begin to betray their promise. They begin to mix their intentions. They begin to try to forget what they promised before when they were about to die."

Reference: Quran 29:65

"And nobody denies our signs except a person who is khattar—a betrayer, one who gives promise and deliberately betrays it. Kafur means the one who neglects or denies or hides the signs of Allah in the truth."

The Importance of Intention

In Islam, the intention is of utmost importance. It is the foundation upon which all actions are judged. The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ emphasized this in a well-known hadith, highlighting that actions are evaluated based on the intentions behind them. This principle underscores the significance of sincerity and purpose in every deed.

The Hadith on Intention

(Sahih al-Bukhari)

"Verily, actions are but by intentions and every man shall have only that which he intended."

This hadith, narrated by Umar ibn al-Khattab, emphasizes that the value of an action is determined by the intention behind it. If the intention is pure and aligned with the teachings of Islam, the action is considered righteous, regardless of its outward appearance. Conversely, if the intention is flawed, the action loses its value.

The Significance of Sincerity

Sincerity is crucial in all aspects of life, especially in religious practices. It means performing actions solely for the sake of Allah, without seeking recognition or worldly gain. When a person acts with sincerity, their actions are more likely to be accepted and rewarded by Allah.

The hadith also highlights that a person will only receive what they intended. This means that if someone intends to perform a good deed, they will be rewarded accordingly, even if they are unable to complete it. Conversely, if someone intends to do something wrong, they will be held accountable for their intention, even if they do not carry it out.

Examples of Good Intentions

The hadith provides examples of good intentions, such as migrating for the sake of Allah or seeking knowledge. These actions are considered righteous because they are motivated by a desire to please Allah and to improve oneself. The Prophet ﷺ also emphasized the importance of having good intentions in all aspects of life, including daily activities.

The Importance of Correct Action

While intention is paramount, it is also essential to ensure that actions are performed correctly. This means following the teachings of Islam and adhering to the guidelines provided in the Quran and the Sunnah. Without correct action, even the best intentions may not be fully realized.

The combination of proper intention and correct action is the key to success in this life and the hereafter. By striving to have pure intentions and performing actions in accordance with the teachings of Islam, Muslims can earn the pleasure of Allah and achieve true success.

The Importance of Time

Time is a precious commodity in Islam, and Muslims are encouraged to make the most of it. The Quran and Sunnah emphasize the importance of utilizing time wisely and avoiding activities that are unproductive or harmful. This section explores the significance of time and how Muslims should approach it.

The Value of Time

Time is a gift from Allah, and it is a limited resource. Every moment is an opportunity to perform good deeds, seek knowledge, and draw closer to Allah. Muslims are encouraged to be mindful of their time and to avoid wasting it on trivial pursuits. The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said, "Take advantage of five things before five things: your youth before your old age, your health before your illness, your wealth before your poverty, your free time before your being busy, and your life before your death." (Reported by al-Hakim)

Avoiding Wasteful Activities

Islam discourages Muslims from engaging in activities that are unproductive or harmful. This includes wasting time on idle talk, excessive entertainment, and other pursuits that do not benefit them or others. Muslims should strive to fill their time with activities that are beneficial, such as prayer, reading the Quran, seeking knowledge, and helping others.

Making the Most of Every Moment

Muslims are encouraged to make the most of every moment by engaging in activities that are pleasing to Allah. This includes performing acts of worship, seeking knowledge, helping others, and striving to improve oneself. By utilizing time wisely, Muslims can increase their chances of success in this life and the hereafter.

Planning and Organization

Planning and organization are essential for making the most of time. Muslims should set goals, prioritize their activities, and create schedules to ensure that they are utilizing their time effectively. By being organized, Muslims can avoid wasting time and focus on the things that are most important.

The Importance of Reflection

Reflection is an important aspect of time management. Muslims should take time to reflect on their actions, evaluate their progress, and make adjustments as needed. By reflecting on their lives, Muslims can identify areas where they can improve and make better use of their time.

The Reality of This World

Islam teaches that this world is a temporary abode, and the hereafter is the eternal realm. Understanding the true nature of this world is crucial for Muslims to live a balanced life and prepare for the afterlife. This section explores the reality of this world and its relationship to the hereafter.

The Temporary Nature of This World

The Quran emphasizes that this world is temporary and fleeting. It is a place of trials and tribulations, and its pleasures are ultimately unsatisfying. Muslims are encouraged to focus on the hereafter and to strive for the eternal rewards that await them. The Quran states:

"And the worldly life is not but the enjoyment of delusion."

This verse highlights the deceptive nature of this world, emphasizing that its pleasures are temporary and ultimately lead to disappointment. Muslims should not be overly attached to this world but should instead focus on preparing for the hereafter.

The Importance of the Hereafter

The hereafter is the eternal realm where people will be judged for their actions in this world. It is a place of either eternal bliss or eternal punishment. Muslims are encouraged to prioritize the hereafter and to strive to earn the pleasure of Allah. This includes performing good deeds, avoiding sins, and seeking knowledge.

Living with the Hereafter in Mind

Living with the hereafter in mind means making decisions and taking actions that are in accordance with the teachings of Islam. It means being mindful of Allah in all aspects of life and striving to earn His pleasure. This includes performing acts of worship, seeking knowledge, helping others, and avoiding sins.

The Day of Judgment

The Day of Judgment is the day when all people will be resurrected and judged for their actions. It is a day of great significance, and Muslims are encouraged to prepare for it by performing good deeds and seeking forgiveness from Allah. The Quran describes the Day of Judgment in detail, emphasizing the importance of accountability and the consequences of one's actions.

The Reality of This World on the Day of Judgment

On the Day of Judgment, the true nature of this world will be revealed. People will realize that the pleasures and possessions of this world were temporary and insignificant compared to the eternal rewards of the hereafter. The Quran states that people will ask,

"Who has brought us back to life after our slumber?"

This question reflects the shock and realization that the worldly life was merely a dream, and the true reality is the hereafter.

The Day of Judgment: A Day of Reflection

The Day of Judgment is a day of profound reflection, where individuals will be confronted with the consequences of their actions in this world. This section explores the nature of this reflection and the emotions that will be experienced on that day.

The Questioning of Time

On the Day of Judgment, people will be questioned about their lives and how they spent their time. The Quran describes this questioning, highlighting the importance of utilizing time wisely. People will be asked how long they stayed on earth.

"How long did you stay on earth in number of years?"

The people will respond, feeling that their time on earth was short.

"They will say, 'We stayed a day or part of a day.'"

This response reflects the fleeting nature of this world and the brevity of life in comparison to the eternal hereafter.

The Perspective of the 'Addeen

The 'addeen, those who are skilled in calculating, will provide a more accurate assessment of the time spent on earth. They will emphasize that the time spent in this world was not even a full day. This highlights the insignificance of worldly life in the grand scheme of eternity.

"You did not stay except for a day."

The Regret of the Day of Judgment

The Day of Judgment will be a time of regret for those who did not live their lives in accordance with the teachings of Islam. They will regret the time they wasted, the opportunities they missed, and the sins they committed. This regret will be a source of great sorrow and anguish.

The regret will stem from realizing the true value of time and the importance of preparing for the hereafter. People will lament the fact that they were preoccupied with worldly matters and neglected their spiritual obligations. They will wish they had spent their time more wisely and had focused on earning the pleasure of Allah.

The regret will be particularly poignant for those who were wealthy but did not use their wealth to help others or to support the cause of Islam. They will realize that their wealth was a test from Allah, and they failed to use it in a way that would benefit them in the hereafter.

The Day of Judgment serves as a reminder of the importance of living a righteous life and preparing for the hereafter. It is a call to action for Muslims to make the most of their time, to seek knowledge, to perform good deeds, and to avoid sins. By doing so, they can hope to avoid the regret of the Day of Judgment and earn the eternal rewards of Jannah.

Similarly is the case of our deen. If your priority is Allah, then one of the means that helps you is to work for the sake of Allah in an entertaining form. Nothing wrong with that.

Making Things Easy

Our Rasul ﷺ once sat trying to teach a man about how many rak'ahs are in each prayer and how many prayers there are. So Rasul ﷺ would repeat, "Fajr is two prayers, Dhuhr is four rak'ahs, 'Asr is four, Maghrib is three, 'Isha is four." And he tried to explain the sunnahs that are wajib for them. And the man could not memorize them. He had a bad memory.

So a companion entered and he found that Rasul ﷺ was struggling, really, in trying to get this man to memorize the amount of rak'ahs and so on. So the man said, "Dear Rasul ﷺ, allow me, can I try?"

So he sat with him and he made what the Rasul ﷺ said in the form of a poem. It rhymed. And the man memorized it. Teaching the deen in an entertaining fashion. You are enjoying it, you're having a laugh, at the same time you're making Allah your priority. Why are you doing it? You're doing it to make the deen easier for the people, to bring the deen to the people.

Some people they say, "Why should I drive to the masjid? Walk to the masjid. It's Dhuhr. It's forty degrees. Still walk?"

"Yes, because for every step that you take, there are ten hasanat and a say'ah taken off, or ten hasanat and ten off. So you should walk."

"Even if it means I'm going to probably not make it there because of the heat?"

"Yes."

No, brother, no. Your priority is Allah. If it means that, go in your car and go there. Make deen easy for you to practice. Don't make it hard upon you to practice. Less is more sometimes, so long as your intentions are good.

Good Work with Wrong Intentions

So if your priority is Allah and His Messenger, then you will be a person who enjoys worship, not one who makes it hard. At the same time, my brothers and sisters in Islam, some people do good work with the wrong intention, and some people do bad work for the wrong intention.

For example, there are people who like to look a particular form. They want to look like some celebrity. They want to imitate some kind of act which Allah and His Messenger don't like. Why? Because their intention is in order to look cool. Their intention is in order to receive praise from their friends and their colleagues. Their

particular form, their identity is one at home, and then when they see their friends and they see their colleagues, their identity suddenly changes. Why? Why? Because their intention is in order to please people.

These two people—those who are working for the acts that Allah loves, and those who are doing acts which Allah hates—what is the common thing between them that makes them both fail? What is the common thing that makes them both fail and their actions not serve them? I'll tell you what it is. It is the wrong intentions.

The person who does the wrong act suffers in two ways: the wrong intention and the wrong act. The person who does the good suffers also in two ways: they strive and struggle to do the good act, and it is not accepted because their intention is wrong. So two things.

Transforming Your Intentions

Brothers and sisters in Islam, making Allah our priority means that whatever you do in life, do it in a halal way. If it's entertaining, alhamdulillah, do it. If it is not an entertaining thing, then still strive for the sake of Allah if Allah loves them and avoid the haram as much as you can. That will mean that everything you do in your life can be transformed into an action by which you have prioritized Allah.

How? Let me give you a few examples. We all know that if you open up the Quran and read, you are doing an act on the outside at least that prioritizes Allah's pleasure. Isn't that correct? You fast Ramadan. On the outside, you look like a person who is doing an act that prioritizes the pleasure of Allah. If you have the proper intention, alhamdulillah, you are prioritizing Allah.

Everybody understands that if you go to Hajj or you pray or you grow your beard or you wear your hijab or you donate or whatever you do, it is an act which Allah has been prioritized with. You leave your work to pray your salat. You take half of your lunch break in order to do your Jumu'ah. So you sacrifice things for the sake of Allah. Excellent, excellent. But this is the obvious way of making Allah your priority.

Simple Actions That Prioritize Allah

I will give you some other ways that are not so obvious, to make every single person here in this room and everyone around the world—whether you are knowledgeable or not knowledgeable, whether you are capable of donating like a wealthy person or incapable of doing that, whether you are able to go to the masjid or not able to go to the masjid, whether you have these luxuries or not—there are a thousand other ways where you prioritize Allah in the normal actions that you practice in your day.

How? Did you not hear the hadith of the Prophet ﷺ where he said, "When you enter the toilet, enter it with your which foot?" Left foot.

Is there anyone here who is not able to do that? Unless you don't have a left foot or you are paralyzed. May Allah cure those who are in that situation and reward them for their patience. You enter with your left foot.

The Sunnah of the Prophet ﷺ is that you don't talk inside of the toilet. Why? Out of respect for the angels who write. They don't like entering places which human beings find undesirable.

So then after that, you exit the toilet with your right foot. Is anyone here unable who has two legs to walk out with their right foot? Everybody is able to do that. And then you say something very simple. You either say:

"I seek Your forgiveness."

Maybe inside the toilet, maybe a person recited the Quran in their mind, or maybe they said words of dhikr in their mind, or maybe accidentally they would have said their normal dhikr words silently upon their tongue or something like that. So they say, "Forgive me if I have made any mistake."

Or you can say:

"Praise be to Allah who has taken away this harm away from me and saved me from any sickness."

(Sunan Ibn Majah 300)

By doing these four simple acts—yes, four simple acts—you have suddenly transformed a very natural part of a human need, whether you are Muslim or not, into an act of worship. You have turned it into an act of worship that is like, similar to praying to Allah, reading the Quran, fasting, donating, just by merely with the intention of adhering to the sunnah of the Prophet ﷺ. You have prioritized Allah.

Continue with your work. Continue with what you are doing. But in your intentions, who is your priority? Allah.

The Story of the Brother Who Questioned Ghufraanak

One brother sat with me one time. He thought that he was very educated, masha'Allah. He's got a doctorate and said to me—which is nothing wrong; Muslims should be educated in all areas, except the haram areas, unless you are going to learn the haram area in order to what? To know ways of how to stop it. A person learns about how people practice sorcery in order to what? To save themselves from these types of people, or in order to stop these sorcerers, for example, if they have that power to do so.

But when a person—this person sat with me and said, "What is this idea of saying ghufraanak when you exit the toilet? What have I done wrong? I've only went and done something which every human has a need to do. And

I've exited the toilet and I have to ask Allah to forgive me? Where's the sense in that?"

I say to him, "Akhi al-kareem, have you not considered at least that you are practicing a sunnah which the Prophet ﷺ used to do, intending for the rewards at least? I mean, is everything that we do just purely, if I don't get a gain from it directly, then I shouldn't do it? Why don't you think of it this way: that if you do something which Allah and His Messenger love, you are automatically getting rewarded only for the mere fact that Allah and His Messenger love it."

The Example of the Convert Sister

So when you prioritize Allah and His Messenger, I'll give you an example. I asked, back in Australia, I asked a sister who had converted to Islam—may Allah accept it from her, and all of those who have changed their life and transformed it for the sake of Allah. This sister put on the hijab, proper hijab, not trousers and a little headscarf or something like that. This is a trend back in the West now. They wear pants and a scarf.

But the hijab is not a scarf. A scarf is just something—even men wear it. You've seen the Khaleejis in the Qataris, they wear it. This is called the khimar in the Arabic language. In the Quran, khimar, khimar. Men wear it too.

The only difference is that Allah says:

"Tell the women, let the women, however, use their khimar to draw it over the jaib."

Jaib is the opening of any shirt or thing that you wear above. So however big the opening is, they have to draw it over and also the chest area and the back. So hijab.

I asked her, "May I ask you a question? Why did you wear the hijab?" These converts who come into Islam, why did they wear the hijab? I mean, we've always given da'wah for the sake of Allah and tried to explain the reason and the wisdom behind hijab, and often we fail. It's not easy to explain the hijab to non-Muslims. Not easy at all. Very, very difficult.

So why did they put on the hijab? They became Muslim because of the truth of Islam. They found Allah. Believed in Allah. Believed in the Hereafter. Believed in the Quran. And look, suddenly she found the verse in the Quran which tells her to wear the hijab. She says, "Allah said this?"

"Yes, Allah said this."

"That's all I need to know."

The faith that increased, the priority of Allah means that whatever Allah recommends or commands, and whatever He prohibits or dislikes, a person automatically either does it or doesn't do it just for the mere fact that Allah is their objective.

Final Questions for Self-Reflection

Brothers and sisters in Islam, what is your priority in life? Are you doing it for worldly gain? Or are you doing it to gain the pleasure of Allah in the Hereafter?

Sit down tonight, alone, with no distractions, and ask yourself:

• Today, I attended this lecture. Why did I attend it? What am I now going to do about it?
• Today, I gave in sadaqah. Why did I do it? What do I want to gain out of it?
• Today, I joined as a part of this good work with a group of brothers or sisters. Why did I do it, and what do I want to gain out of it?

Ask yourself all these questions and come to a sincere and honest conclusion with yourself. Have I truly intended well? If I intended well, let me test myself. Did I show the signs? Meaning, if I helped out in this particular good work, was I among the first to be there? Was I among the first to exert my energy for it? Or was I there only to be seen? Was I there only so that my name can be mentioned later on? Was I there so that people can come up to me and say, "Salamu 'alaykum, masha'Allah"? Did I do it for that reason?

My brothers and sisters in Islam, when I practice a particular action, did I do it because of tradition first, or because of Islam first?

The Issue of Culture and Tradition

I know customs and traditions are important in Islam. Very important. In fact, in our Sharia, there are five principles in coming to a conclusive ruling in fiqh, and one of these principles is al-'urfu muhakkam—that customs and traditions can be used in a court of law. Customs can be used in making rulings in Sharia, but not before a clear ruling from Allah or His Messenger is there.

So when there are clear rulings from Allah and His Messenger, and there is tradition and custom, which one do I put before the other?

I'll give you a few examples. As a marriage celebrant—I'm a marriage celebrant in Australia—I found out many different cultures in how they perform their marriages. And subhanAllah, some of them were pleasing, but others of them, wallahi, caused us so much heartache, which caused a lot of youth to not want to get married and resort to haram means or to difficult means, which caused the parents to fall into predicaments.

Example: Mahr and Marriage Customs

Tradition and culture, for example, in my culture, the Arab culture—so that I don't attack anyone here, I have a different culture—in my culture, the Arab culture, the Lebanese culture, when you want to get married, you have to talk about the mahr. This is Islamic, the mahr, the dowry, loosely translated.

And it is a custom and tradition in certain parts of Lebanon that it has to be more than $100,000. Mahr of $100,000 to $150,000. And you know what they say to you? They say to you, "Don't worry, don't worry, it's just ink on paper."

You know what "ink on paper" means? Meaning, "We don't really mean it."

And then you reply, and you know that on the Day of Judgment, Allah will ask you about this mahr. Because Allah says:

"[Give your wives the sadaq—the sadaq is the mahr which you promised them—nihla, from you know, out of satisfaction, out of clear heartedness.]"

And don't take any of it. You come and tell them this, they say, "No, no, no, it's just ink on paper."

And then, God forbid, when a divorce happens or a separation happens, what happens? The parents come in and they say, "We want every cent."

What happens to this person? Culture takes over and this person no longer wants to get married. How can they get married and afford to get married? So what do they resort to? Their daughters, their sons are eloping, running off.

Why make the mahr so big? Because of culture and the stresses of tradition. "What will people think? My daughter went cheap."

So now you're selling your daughter?

One brother said to me, he went to Lebanon to get married. I can speak about my own kind a little bit. Went to get married. Brother said to him, "$50,000," knowing that he's from Australia.

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He said, "You're selling me a cattle? A cow or something? What's this? Is this a trade of livestock? Your daughter is worth more than that. But do you have to put a price to her?"

This tradition.

Another thing: when you get engaged, you have to chuck this huge party. Engagement. Before marriage. The nikah hasn't even been done.

So then they say, "Okay, now I want to officially engage you to my daughter. We have to invite the relatives and we have to invite this person and that person and that person. So how much money are you going to spend on this celebration? You have to hire this whole out and you have to buy this thing, and she has to wear a semi-wedding dress."

The brother is not even halfway. He's not even married. It's just a question: "Can I marry your daughter in the future and see how things go?" And automatically he's already paid the amount of what it'll cost to actually get married.

So the brother ends up poor and then says, "SubhanAllah, we can't get married right now. Why? I've spent all my money on your engagement. We have to now postpone it until about a year. I have to work harder and I have to now work double jobs. I'm sorry I can't talk to you. I can't get to know you anymore because this was the intention. Because now I have to go to work, night shift and day shift."

Then the parent says, "Ya akhi, it's been one year. Tradition says that you're not allowed to be with her alone. Let's do the katb-i-ktab, the nikah contract."

So they come to do the katb-i-ktab. "Ah! But when you do the katb-i-ktab, you are not allowed to go out alone. You're not allowed to hold each other's hands. What will people think? Look, ya akhi, you've married her."

"No, no, no, no. We're only doing this to help you because people will start talking—coming in and out, in and out all the time. This is 'ayb."

So now look how difficult marriage has become. And then they want to cut off the marriage. "Bring the mahr."

"Ya akhi, I thought it was ink on paper."

"Every cent. She's my daughter. You think she'll go cheap like that? Just come and go?"

So what happens? They don't want to get married anymore. We have now in the West this idea of de facto relationships and partnership, no longer husband and wife, even in our own Muslim communities. Why?

Because they prioritize tradition and culture and customs more than Islam itself.

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Simplicity in Engagement

One brother, I said to him, "When you do an engagement, it's just a promise to marry. You come in secret and you ask the brother, father, 'Can I get to know your daughter?' He says, 'Wallahi, you look like a nice person, genuine person. Bring your father here.' They talk a little bit and they say, 'Okay, you've got a few weeks; they can come and get to know us and we get to know you. No one else can ask for her. That's it.' That's all it is. The next day a person can pick up the phone and say, 'Ya akhi, look, we thought of not going ahead.' 'Okay, easy.' No strings attached. Everybody goes their own way. Simple, simple, simple."

One brother, he got engaged and a promise was made for marriage. Alhamdulillah. One day it didn't work out and he just walked away. Alhamdulillah. Simple.

The Story of Al-Fatiha at Engagement

So I said to this brother, "Look, now that you're engaged, they invited me to this engagement and we had this little celebration." And they said, "Okay, now we have to recite al-Fatiha to officially conclude that this engagement is official."

I said, "Akhi, let's make a du'a."

He says, "No, you have to recite al-Fatiha."

Now, there's nothing wrong with al-Fatiha. So I explained to them, "Look, al-Fatiha is a good idea and everything like that, and it doesn't have to be, have to be, have to be."

He says, "No, it has to be by tradition and culture."

And I wish that he would have said, "Let's please Allah by reciting al-Fatiha." This brother doesn't even pray. He says to me, "You have to say al-Fatiha."

After explaining, alhamdulillah, they were convinced. They brought out the sweet. It's also part of tradition. And the brother said, "Yeah, shuhada, what's this? You brought out the sweet before reciting al-Fatiha? This is abominable!" And made a huge thing.

So the brother was my cousin who was getting engaged. He got upset with me. The next day he said, "Ya akhi, I invited you and look what you did to me."

"So what did I do?"

He said, "Look, ya akhi, tell them to recite al-Fatiha, please. Now they're thinking of whether I should take their daughter or not because they think we're extreme."

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So I had to go up to him and say, "Ya akhi, wallah, I'm not extreme. I'm the last person to be extreme about things. I'm just saying that, make things simple, easy. Falas, recite al-Fatiha. Go ahead. But what I was trying to point out was when culture and tradition become so serious that simplicity of the deen turns into this complication."

I've just given one simple example of culture and customs and traditions where the deen made it so easy. And when we prioritize things which Allah did not make upon us, we become like the people before us as the Christians and Jews did. They made rabbis and priesthood where a sect of them are not allowed to get married—priests who cannot get married. We see the result today of what is happening to them. How can an imam give counseling to a married couple when he cannot get married? How?

So when we prioritize certain things before Allah and His Messenger, our hearts become hardened. Our relationships become severed. Our happiness goes away. Our lives become complicated. And all of our actions which we did are like dust in the wind. I wish that we could have even earned something pleasurable out of it.

Closing Du'a

My brothers and sisters in Islam, I hope from Allah that I have benefited from this before you. And then I ask Allah that if you have benefited anything tonight, to genuinely with a sincere intention pass it on to your families and to your friends and to other people.

Today, I went to QTV, Qatar TV station. Wallahi, it was the best experience for me. I spoke on the camera directed at non-Muslims. I thought I was talking to Muslims. And I thought, subhanAllah, what's the purpose of—you know, I'm here and you've got, masha'Allah, lots of mashayikh and scholars and ulema and da'is. This is the land of the Arabic language.

And today, I realized that there are so many non-Muslims here, and so many Muslims who know English only, who don't know much about the deen. And I realized, is this so? Could it be that there is a great need for da'wah here in Qatar like there is a need in Australia?

I realized this today, brothers and sisters in Islam. And I have to say, please, my brothers and sisters in Islam, from my brother, from my heart to your heart, intending well, continue this work and improve it. Keep going more.

But this cannot be done unless, first of all, your intentions are in the right place. When you do this, do it for Allah, really, really. When you recite Al-Fatiha every single rak'ah, in every single salat that you pray, you are making a contract with Allah again and again:

"You, Allah, alone do we worship, and You, Allah, alone do we seek the help from."

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Reference: Quran 1:5

Do you really mean it? I'm asking you. Do you really mean it? Do you really mean that only Allah you are worshiping? You know what that means? Say, He is Allah, the One and Only that should be my objective. That's what it means. It's Allah that you should be making your objective, one.

Is it truly Allah that you are worshiping? Is it truly Allah that you are doing this work for? Is it truly the hereafter that you want to really see your work?

I, masha'Allah, I've seen many brothers and sisters here who are the backbone of this great work, the backbone. They don't want to be mentioned. They don't want to be known. They don't want their work to be, you know, on placards. Their names be engraved on placards. They don't care if they're in or out so long as they're doing something. May Allah reward you.

Increase in that effort, my brothers and sisters in Islam, and make that your priority. Wherever you work, whatever you do, enjoy your wealth, enjoy your work, enjoy your car, enjoy your family, but transform the intention. That is all that is between you and Jannah—a line, a thin line which exists inside here. Transform the intention and make it sincere. Then the shaitan will have no room to enter and whisper.

Because he said:

"By Your might and power, O Lord, I shall lead them all astray. Except one type of people."

And I end it with this type of people. What did he say? Except your servants, not all of them, among them, from among the Muslims, who are truly sincere in their actions, seeking Your pleasure.

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Closing Prayers

I ask Allah to bless you. I ask Allah to gather us among those who are sincere, whose actions will not be dust in the wind. Even if our actions are a little bit, to accept our actions as if they are like a mountain.

I ask Allah to accept our work. I ask Allah to make my brothers and sisters here in Qatar from among the most successful, and to make your work among the most successful.

I ask Allah to bring happiness into your hearts and satisfaction to your families. To make life easy for you and simple.

And I ask Allah to forgive my sins and yours. To give us mercy. To unite our hearts.

I ask Allah to accept my work. And I ask Allah to benefit us with the beautiful knowledge that He has given us.

I ask Allah that we meet again. If not in this world, in Jannah, in the hereafter.

I ask Allah to respond in favor of my du'as and prayers.

"I say this and I ask Allah to forgive me and you. So forgive Him, O the Victor of those who forgive."

وَصَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَى نَبِيِّنَا مُحَمَّدٍ وَعَلَى آلِهِ وَصَحْبِهِ وَسَلَّمَ

"And may Allah send blessings upon our Prophet Muhammad and upon his family and companions."

وَالسَّلَامُ عَلَيْكُمْ وَرَحْمَةُ اللَّهِ وَبَرَكَاتُهُ

End of Khutbah