Suspicions About Islam

13 Suspicions About Islam

Introduction: The Danger of Compromising Islam

I'm going to talk a little bit about what I mean when I say that there's a lot of be very careful not to compromise your Islam. Because some people who have nuclear bombs, who build aeroplanes, who seem to have lots of money and who seem to have lots of technology and they seem to have done amazing things. So we become so awestruck that we think because they achieve this, everything they say must be right.

And then we do everything to explain our religion on their terms. But the reason why these ideas have come up is because we now feel we have to adjust our religion to make it fit these ideas that are coming out from the West. We find Muslims bending over backwards to change our religion to make it fit these ideas.

But these ideas are corrupt and they will prove to be corrupt and Islam will prove to be correct. And we Muslims will have to stand and we'll say, oh dear, Islam was right all along. Do we need that to happen? Don't we believe in Allah? Don't we believe Allah knows everything? Don't we believe that Allah is the most wise? Do we believe that we have to justify our religion in the terms of what they say? No.

Islam is the Truth

Islam is the haq. It's the truth. And time will prove that Islam is the truth. But in that time, brothers and sisters, don't leave your religion. Don't abandon Islam. Don't adjust the truth to make it fit with the falsehood.

No. Be patient. Don't be amazed by these people and the way they are and the things that you see. Be amazed with Allah. Be amazed with the Sunnah of the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم. This is a much better thing, brothers and sisters, to be amazed with.

Addressing Controversial Issues in Islam

There are a few things now before we just finish the talk that we could say are a little bit controversial. Yes, Islam gives women without doubt and recognizes their humanity. Islam gives women and men their rights by defining for them the natural position and the natural situation which the men should adopt and the women should adopt.

And this is liberating them so that they can fulfill their true nature, just like letting that dolphin out into the ocean, just like paying the worker their wages. Islam is liberating us from the false ideas and the oppressive ideologies and returning us to our natural condition which Allah created us. But some people have some questions about some certain things in Islam.

One of those is the hijab. One of those is the issue of polygamy. One of those is why two women witnesses to one male witness. One of those things is how come the man can divorce the woman and the woman can't

divorce the man, except she has to go to court. And how come Islam allows a man to beat his wife?

Now it is worth answering those questions. It is worth answering those questions.

The Issue of Disciplining the Wife

Understanding Authority and Responsibility

Let us start with the last one. First of all, let us examine the verses. Let us examine the verses that talk about this. The Qur'an does not say, and the man can beat his wife, just like that. The Qur'an is clearly telling, first of all, that Allah has given the man a responsibility, a responsibility to ensure that his family, his wife, his children are following the straight path, the straight path that leads to Allah, the straight path that leads to paradise and goes away from the hellfire. This is the responsibility the man has been given.

Now all of us recognize, for example, any government has the responsibility to care for its citizens. Is that true or not? Yes? And does not every government have the responsibility to prevent criminal action? Yes or no? Is it the responsibility of government to arrest the thieves and the murderers and the rapists and to do something with them to prevent that happening and to prevent that evil spreading in society? Is that not the duty of government? Yes or no?

And don't we all recognize that governments are allowed to use some type of force in order to arrest such people and to prevent them from their harm? Yes or no? Is there one place on the face of this earth, except maybe some little island somewhere, there is only ten people and they are all related maybe, where you don't have a police force who has to arrest people, who prevents riots, who prevents evil. Is this true or not? You have every country, every place in the world, this exists.

Yes or no? Yes. So we recognize that those in authority have the right to use force if they have to, to prevent some evil taking place. What is the problem therefore that Islam has given the head of the household some allowance to use a type of force in order to prevent his family from falling into evil? And that force has conditions on it and it has prerequisites to it.

The Three-Step Process

The first thing the Quran mentions is if you perceive some evil or if you see some evil, this means some evil, some Islamic evil, something that is haram, something that is disobedience to Allah سبحانه وتعالى. And Allah also mentions in these same ayat that the believing women, they are obedient to their husbands and they guard in their husband's absence their chastity. So if someone sees that his wife is going astray or his family is going astray, then Allah has given a system of correction to prevent this crime that will lead to something much worse than prison, lead to the hellfire.

First Allah said to the man to admonish the wife. First you tell her, like you would tell anyone, giving them dawah, with maw'idah, giving them dawah, with a nice exhortation. And explain to them in the nicest way, with

wisdom. Oh my wife, don't you see that Allah said this? And don't you see that the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said that? And aren't you afraid of Allah's punishment? And don't you want Allah's reward? And this is the wisdom and the benefit and the reasons behind this that you should do this and this and this. So this is the first stage of advising his wife, of exhorting her, of teaching her, of reminding her. If, if this does not work, if this does not work, then he can take another step.

And another step is that he turns his back on her in the bedroom. He turns his back on her. Because it is something the wife loves from the husband. That he is affectionate towards her, even in the physical sense. It's something that the woman loves from her husband. Actually, if the husband is already like a cold fish to his wife, and only, you know, hardly ever hugs her or kisses her, and you know, they don't even like, even hardly look at each other except, you know, once a month or something like that, then I don't suppose that him turning his back on her is going to have much effect, you know.

But this is not how the relationship between the husband and the wife should be in Islam. We are garments one for the other. The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم used to play with his wives. He used to joke with them. They used to race with each other. They used to take showers. They used to take ghusl together, and him and Aisha would fight to take the water from the bucket. This is Islam. This is how the affection should be between the husband and the wife. The best of you are those who are best to their wives. So if your relationship is like that, then you turn your back on your wife, your wife is going to feel sad, and she, inshaAllah, she's going to relent to that. Even if this after some time does not work, then the husband is allowed to prevent her from evil, to apply some type of physical force.

The Nature of Permissible Discipline

This is a type of very light beating. This is a type of very light beating. In fact, as some scholars mentioned, it is just to hit with the miswak. But Allah al-alam, what we know from the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم is this type of beating is not allowed to leave any type of mark. It is not allowed to break the skin. It is not allowed to break a bone or even leave a mark on the skin.

A beating that is that severe is forbidden, and this is a type of assault. It's haram and a crime in Islam to treat your wife like that. But a type of physical reprimand in order to bring her to goodness is allowed.

This is not an excuse for a man to beat his wife. It's not allowed, just for any reason, because you're angry, you're upset, because, oh, the dinner's not ready. What is this? This is not the way. This is not Islam at all. In fact the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم hated that people should beat their wives. He did not like that people should beat their wives.

In fact, he said, the best of you are not those who beat their wives. And in fact, he used to prohibit it until Umar actually came and complained that we cannot keep the women under control, that we have to allow some type of physical thing for us. And the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم allowed it, but he said, but the best of you are not those people who do it.

You shouldn't ever have to, ever have to even raise your hand at your wife. But in an extreme situation, Allah has given the man a degree of authority in order to prevent them, to save them from the hellfire, then this small type of allowance has been given. This is to do with the fact that Allah has given the man that responsibility and that authority. And Allah will question him about it. Okay.

Women as Witnesses

The second thing is about the witnessing. Two women witnessing to one man. This is due again to the nature of the woman and the nature of man in society. In general in Islam, the woman is the one who cares for the children, who cares for the family, and she has that task and that responsibility. Whereas the man in general is the one who is earning the livelihood, earning the money, and that is his responsibility. Therefore, in these issues of financial transactions, we need two women witnesses, one to remind the other. But this is only in this area.

There are other areas where women are more expert. For example, in the issue of childbirth or in many other issues, we could say that the women are expert and we don't need two women witnesses for one man. In fact, the witness of a woman will be more valuable than the witness of a man in those instances. But it is only in this specific, some few specific cases that Allah سبحانه وتعالى made that the case.

The Issue of Polygamy

Polygamy is for the Benefit of Women

Now the issue of polygamy. Actually, this is going to be, maybe sound strange to people, but polygamy is not for the men. It's not for the men. Anyone who was in polygamy, any man who's in polygamy will know that the polygamy is not for the man. I know, I was there once, okay. And believe me, it's very, very, very hard. Really, polygamy, you know, the men, they dream, of course. They say, oh, four wives, you know. Oh, fantastic. Yes, yes. That's your dream only.

Actually, the reality is that polygamy is something that is for benefit for the women. But very few women realize that and very few women take advantage of it. It's very sad, actually. On the behalf of the women, it is sad. Because really, the benefit of polygamy for the women is for those women who are divorced and those women who are widowed and those women who do not have a husband to care for them. The benefit of polygamy and the wisdom behind it is to allow those women to enter into a proper, fulfilling relationship and not to fall into something haram.

I'm not saying this is the condition. It's allowed in Islam for a man to marry four virgins. But this is not the benefit. This is not the wisdom. And all of the marriages of the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم except the marriage to Aisha and Zaynab, and both of these were ordered by Allah through revelation. Both of those marriages were ordered by Allah through revelation.

But if you look at all the rest of the marriages of the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلمevery one of them had a social or political benefit. Either the benefit was in building the relationship with some tribe or he was helping one of the wives of his companions who had died and he did it out of care for them and so on and so forth. All of them had a benefit.

The Social Benefits of Polygamy

And in fact, this is something that in society generally is beneficial for the women. And it's advantageous for the women. And if the woman could only get over her jealousy and understand that benefit and love for her sister what she loved for herself, and none of you truly believes until you love for your brother and your sister what you love for yourself. If they realize that, they would understand the benefits of having another sister or another two sisters that could help you with your house, with your children, with their education. And really there are societies, Muslim societies, who understand that benefit and really get so much from this thing. So actually polygamy, alhamdulillah, it may be harmful for the first wife because she has to share her husband, but since when in Islam were we only concerned about ourselves? This is not our religion to be so selfish and to be only concerned about yourself.

Addressing Male Desires in a Halal Way

So Islam is something you see even in the issue of polygamy. It's something that is helping the women as well of course as helping the men because another thing I mentioned is the men have a certain weakness. And that weakness that they have without a doubt is in controlling their sexual desires. So Allah has given all the halal way for the man to fulfill that. The halal way. This means we've got no excuse for girlfriends, to visit prostitutes, and to have all these haram things, which you find the people, they talk about one man, one wife in America.

You know what Bill Clinton was doing. Monica Lewinsky. And then there was the now dead president of France, Mitterrand. In his funeral, suddenly there appeared a woman and three children, was his mistress for 20 years. 20 years this man had a mistress and three children by them. This is the hypocrisy. And you find many of the men in the West, yes they have one wife but they also visit prostitutes and things like this. It's very common. This is the hypocrisy. But Islam is the just way that's giving everybody their true rights.

The Hijab: True Liberation

Understanding Individual Freedom and Social Responsibility

Now one thing we want to talk about finally, hijab. Actually hijab is one of the very many beautiful things from Islam. And it is not something to oppress the woman. But I have to say something very important brothers and sisters. And this goes back to the whole idea of freedom and subjugation.

Every society recognizes that the human being, each individual human being, you, me, individually, all of us, men, women, children, old people, young people, we have certain rights as individuals. Yes? But we also live

The Wisdom Behind the Hijab

And this is one of the benefits of the hijab. The hijab is not to oppress the woman. Actually, Allah (سبحانه وتعالى - subhanahu wa ta'ala) mentioned the wisdom behind the hijab. Not everything Allah mentioned the wisdom behind why we should do it, but Allah mentioned the wisdom behind the hijab. And Allah said to the believing women to put this garment over themselves, the khimar over themselves to dress in this way. And Allah gave two reasons for that.

The first reason is that so the people may know and recognize them to be believing Muslim women. And the second reason is that they may go unmolested. So the first reason is it is a type of uniform. It is a type of means of recognition because the way you dress, the way you dress makes a statement about yourself. It's a fact. And you know what is a fact in courts all over the world, in America, in Britain, even I read about here in India.

Many women who have gone to court and who have been raped, either the rapist had a very small sentence or no sentence at all. And due to what reason? Because the woman was dressed in a very provocative manner. She was dressed in a very, very provocative manner and behaving in a very provocative manner.

The Natural Attraction Between Men and Women

And this is something actually that happens to the man. When the man sees a woman dressed in a certain way, behaving in a certain way, something happens to him. So if you dress in a certain way, in a very alluring way, then you're going to get a certain reaction from the man. It's called the birds and it's called the flowers and the bees, yes? You have the flower, pretty flower, light colorful petals and the flower lets out a nice scent. So the

bee is flying along and the bee picks up the scent of the flower. Oh, it smells nice. And he sees the pretty colors of the flower. And so the bee goes to take the nectar from the flower. That's what happens, yes? It's nature.

So when the woman's hair's all here and her lipstick and she's looking all beautiful and this and that, the man, like the busy bee, he says, right? And he can't help going towards the beautiful flower. He can't help that. It's the nature. But the problem is, is that, well, the problem is it causes lots of problems. Lots of problems because that girl is someone's daughter or someone's wife or someone's aunt or someone's even someone's mother. And the evil consequences of this are so many.

Hijab as Social Responsibility

So what does Islam do? The woman takes responsibility. She takes social responsibility. She cuts the doors to this evil by covering her beauty. Her beauty is for her husband. She covers her beauty. And also when people see her, they say, no, this is not a woman who is interested in hanky-panky. This is not a woman who's saying, come over here, talk to me, don't I look beautiful? Maybe we can go out tonight. No, because she's dressed.

She's covered herself in loose clothes. She's covered her hair. She's covered her face, her hands maybe even. And it makes a very clear statement. I am not interested in these things. I am a Muslim woman. I am a believer. I am for my husband and my obedience is to Allah.

A British Reporter's Experience with Hijab

I tell you something amazing. In England, there was this whole issue of hijab. And so one female reporter, one female reporter for the independent newspaper, it's a big broadsheet newspaper in England. She dressed one day in niqab, you know, with the hijab and the niqab and all of that. Just to see what it was like. And she was absolutely amazed. She said, I was given so much respect. So I've traveled on the tube now for 15 years, for the first time a man got off his seat and asked me to sit down. People, yes, people were holding doors open for me. She said, I sat in the office and no one disturbed me. And I really enjoyed it.

I really enjoyed the fact that I didn't have to care underneath what underneath what I was wearing. I could wear whatever I like. I didn't have to put on my makeup and make sure I was looking so beautiful. So everyone's going to look at me. I could just be myself. This is what she wrote. And she was, I was amazed. She said, I probably couldn't do it every day, but I have to say all in all, it was apart from being a bit hot, it was a positive experience. This is what she got from that.

Hijab Liberates Women

So the hijab really has many, many benefits. In fact, we could give a lecture just on the benefits of the hijab to society and to the individual women. But one of the reasons Allah gives is so that she will, the people will know she's a believing woman. And actually the second thing is the same. She will be unmolested because she is not showing and displaying herself as a sexual object. When the Muslim woman covers her, the parts of her that are attractive, then she forces the man to treat her as much as he is able. Because even the truth is whenever a man

sees a woman, even a hijab, the woman does something to the man. But as much as she is able, she is covering those things. And she is forcing the man to treat her not as an object of sex, but as a human being.

You see, brothers and sisters, when you see these women all dressed beautifully with everything and their hair everywhere and everything, and she says, but I don't know why the man, he doesn't respect me for my mind. Because sister, you know, lady, we're too busy looking at everything else to think about your mind. That's why we can't think about your mind. But when you cover up, the woman forces us to treat her as a human being and to see what she has to say, not what she has to look like. Subhanallah. So does this liberate the woman? Yes. This is true liberation. This is making the woman really what she is. A human being, a mother, a good wife, honest, chaste person, not just some object for the gratification of the male sex. No.

Conclusion: Islam Gives True Humanity

Islam gives women their true humanity. Islam gives women their true nature. And as we found yesterday, and we find again today, that Islam truly is the way of life to bring true peace and true happiness to the individual and to the society.

Question and Answer Session

Now we go to the question and answer session. We have mics placed here on my right and left and one in the women's section. If there are any non-Muslims who are interested in asking questions, they needn't have to limit to the topic. They can ask from anywhere. Any doubts can be cleared. And we have a first question which was placed by a brother, by Narayanan. What is the position of women as per the Quran? Are they given equal right compared to men? Will you recommend equal right in the modern world? The question, we asked him to come here, so now I request brother Green to give an answer to this.

Question 1: Women's Rights in Islam

My whole lecture was answering this question in fact. But anyway, as I made it clear, maybe I didn't make it clear enough. In general, Islam gives men and women equal rights. Whatever Allah has ordered to the men, Allah has ordered to the women. In general, whatever rights Allah has given to the men, Allah has given to the women. In general. So generally, the rights of the men and the women are the same. What Allah has ordered for the men, Allah has ordered for the women. There are only a few exceptions.

Number one, we need two witnesses, two women witnesses to one man witness in crimes, so on and so forth. We need two women witnesses to one man. That's one difference. The other difference is in inheritance. The woman only inherits a half of what the man inherits. And this is not injustice at all. Absolutely not. And it's not inequality at all. In fact, it is amazingly generous to the woman. Because Allah did not oblige the woman who inherits to spend any of that money on her family, on caring for her family.

That is the obligation of the male members of her household. Allah made men the maintainers and protectors of women. If not her husband, then her father. If not her father, then her brothers and her uncles and so on and so

forth. They are obliged to maintain and protect the woman. The woman should not have to go out and work. It's her right to stay at home. It's her right to look after the children. And if the male members of her family cannot do it, then the society and the government have that responsibility.

So when a woman inherits, it is only for her. When a man inherits, he has to spend from that money for all of the women under his care in the family. So that is justice that he gets more. Because he has much more obligations. Okay? So this is the wisdom behind the woman. She only gets half the inheritance.

And another thing I mentioned is that the woman is not allowed to divorce her husband by saying, I divorce you. In order for the woman to get a divorce, it's permissible for her to get a divorce. But she has to go to the judge in order to do that. This is due to a difference and a weakness in the woman. The woman is more emotional. She needs to be like that in order to care for the children. But the downside of this emotional makeup is that she can react sometimes in emotional manner and that she will not always behave very rationally.

Especially at certain times of the month. So therefore, we find that Allah did not allow the woman just to divorce her husband with a statement.

Because I truly believe that if that was the case, most marriages would not last more than a month. Really. And I don't say that as a joke. I say that from my own personal experience. Okay? This is not again oppression. This is to preserve the family.

Now, apart from those things, maybe I forgot something. But apart from those things and the dress and the dress of the men and the women is different. By the way, I often get asked back in England when the schools come to visit in the mosque and I'm trying to explain about the Muslim woman's dress. I give this example. I say, listen, you have the same idea in your society. Exactly the same. Believe me. If you have a boy and a girl walking down the street together, yes? And the boy is wearing shorts only. And the girl is wearing shorts only. And I mean shorts only. Nothing at all on the top. Which one will get arrested? They said the girl will get arrested.

She will be arrested. I say, why? Well, because she's exposing herself. But the man's exposing himself as well. Yes, but the girl, she's not the same as the boy. I said, thank you very much. That's what I've been saying all along. The men and women are different. Only the difference is in Islam. Our standards of morality are better. What the woman has to cover is not only her, you know, it's all of everything. This is our morality is more strong. But the reason the woman wears hijab and the man doesn't is because men and women are not the same. They're different. The woman is beautiful and she's an adornment and she is something beautifying. In general, the man does not have that same type of thing about him.

So there is a difference between men and women. And Islam recognizes those difference. But in general, in general, the rights of the men and the rights of the women are the same, except for those specific cases that are mentioned as to be exceptions in the Quran or in the sunnah. So I hope that answers the gentleman's question.

Dreams and goals, many mixed emotions in my heart and soul. For some, I made a plan and did the best I can. If God wills things can happen after all, I'm just a man. We have another non-Muslim brother here who would

like to ask a question. We'll come to you after that.

Question 2: Women Driving in Saudi Arabia

Each country has different cultures and different needs. We have to take into account the different cultural sensitivities of their people. The purpose of the scholars and the statements they make and the laws that they implement in the society has the objective of promoting good and prohibiting evil. If I know my people, for example, I try to think, I can't think of another example. But if I know that my people, for example, if they do a certain thing or they meet in a certain way, then that is going to lead to violence or that is going to lead to some type of big evil like fornication or something like that. Yes? Then my duty is to prohibit that thing from taking place.

Yes? Maybe in England, they say the English are very cold. I don't think that's true actually, but anyway, they say the English are very cold. And maybe the people in England do not have this problem or because we in England have now 100 years, we've had 100 years of women and men participating a bit more equally in society. Yes? So the issue of women driving is not a problem in England or in Malaysia or maybe in Indonesia or in some African countries where it's very normal. But in Saudi Arabia, due to their culture, that's their culture, not the religion, but the culture is something different. Women driving would cause many, many problems in society.

So the scholars said in Saudi Arabia, the women should not be allowed to drive because it would lead to many, many problems. Many, maybe in 20 years' time or 30 years' time, it will change and we will see. But right now, the scholars have the right and if you ask the scholars in Saudi Arabia, they will say this law is only for Saudi Arabia. It's not for England. It's not for India or Pakistan or whatever. No, this law is for Saudi Arabia because this is our people and we know our people and we know this thing will have a harmful effect on society. That's the reason that law. So it's not really from the Qur'an and it's not really from the teachings of Prophet Muhammad. It's not from Islam as such, but it is something generally that they do in order to prevent evil, which is allowed to do that in Islam. Yeah? Yeah.

Question 3: Women as Leaders

Mr. Maria? I would like to know why women being denied a seat on these days, despite their holding coveted in the world, a country. Could you speak louder? Yeah, and I think this is why something to do with Muslim women leading the country? Yeah, despite their heading a state there. Is it male chauvinism? Okay, I think I understand your question.

One of the things that is true that Islam does not allow and certainly we say it does not encourage it. And I would say it is correct to say Islam does not allow it is for a woman to be the leader of a country. In fact, in general, Islam does not encourage the women to be in charge of the men or even for the women always to be in charge of their own affairs. You see, if you look at the even in the prayer, when the woman is the Imam, she is standing next to and in the same line with the other women, not in front of them. I wonder why.

And in fact, sisters, you know better.

And my wife is always telling me, Oh, my husband, you don't know what women are like. I say it can't be that you don't know what women are like. They are like this. And they're like that. And they're like such and such. And this is from my wife, from my wife. And we find that women have something in them that they get very easily jealous. And as my wife says, they can be very catty, you know, you know, they scratch each other too much, you know. And so this thing between the backbiting and the snide comments and these things about the women is something that happens amongst them. So leadership for women is a big trial and a big tribulation. And it's not something Allah put generally in their nature.

In fact, the Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم - sallallahu alayhi wasallam) said that no good will ever come to a country who has as its leader a woman. And this is an authentic saying of the Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم - sallallahu alayhi wasallam). This is not because women, again, we go back to what my whole talk was about. It's not because women are inferior and because men are superior. It's because Allah didn't make women good at that. Allah made the women good at plenty of things. And Allah made the women good at things that men are absolutely no good at.

For example, brothers, how many of you can stand listening to a baby crying for more than about five or ten minutes? Me, I'm telling you the truth. If the baby is crying, I'm saying, someone pick up that baby, someone stop, do something. But for some reason, the women, they can listen to a baby and they have to. They have to get on with their work. You know, the baby sometimes cries, it just cries. It doesn't really need anything except to be picked up. But the woman has something in herself that allows her to have patience with that which the man does not have. This is a quality Allah put in the women. So it is actually an oppression on the woman to push her to be the leader of the company, the leader of the society, to be the judge, to be this.

This is the Western society is oppressing the woman. And you find, what do you find? That these women go out, they cut their hair short, they wear dark clothes, they put everything and to do what? To look like a man. They have to make themselves masculine in order to be accepted in the society. Why? Because it's the nature. This is not oppression, it's the opposite. It is liberation.

Like I already said in the beginning of my talk, you keep the dolphin in that small little pond. You may enjoy watching it jump, but you know when you think about it, that is very sad and that's a horrible thing to do to the dolphin. You may enjoy pictures of naked women and watching them dancing and all the rest of it, but you know when you think about it, that's very sad and very sick way to treat a woman. It's a very horrible image to give of the woman. What do we think of women? Oh, woman, she is a dancer and she's a sex object and that's what she's good for. Is this the respect for women? No.

So as I re-emphasize again, Islam is liberating the woman truly by returning her to her nature and the man by returning him to his nature. It's not oppression, it's recognizing the differences between men and women. We'll go to the sisters and get back to you.

Question 4: Paradise at the Feet of the Mother

Sisters, please. Assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh. MashaAllah, Allah has given me a very good

husband, three good children, two daughters and one son. My son asked me, Ma, what does it really mean to say that paradise lies at the feet of your mother? Is that the question? Yes, I have to give him an explanation. It's a very good question. Okay, I just wondered if you'd finished. Okay, that's yes. What does it really mean?

That's a lovely question and it's lovely because I think he wants to go to paradise, alhamdulillah, and he realizes that, yes, and in fact the Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم - sallallahu alayhi wasallam) said, may his face be rubbed in the dust. This is the way the Arabs meaning, may he be humiliated. May his face be rubbed in the dust, may his face be rubbed in the dust, may his face be rubbed in the dust. Who is this messenger of Allah? And the Prophet (صلى الله عليه وسلم - sallallahu alayhi wasallam) said a man whose parents reach old age and he does not enter paradise by serving them. So one of them or both of them.

So paradise lying in the feet of your mother means being kind to your mother, obeying your mother and not disobeying her. When she asks you for something, you do it for her. When she tells you to do something, you do it. When she needs your help, you help her. You are kind to her and you speak gently to her and you do not speak harshly to her. Indeed, you should not even say of or her. You should never speak to your parents like that. This is the respect that you should give them.

So this is what it means really in reality that paradise lies at the feet of your mother. It means serving her and being kind to her and being good to her. And at the very highest level of being kind and being good means to advise her about her Islam. If you see her doing something wrong, to encourage her to do the right thing. And at the highest level of and in equal that also does not mean that when she tells you to do something that is haram, you go and do it. No. How is that helping your mother or serving your mother? That is only helping her to go to hell.

Some people have this wrong idea. They say, oh Allah said obey my parents. That's why I'm working in a bank. That's why I'm marrying this bad woman who doesn't even pray. No. And there are some things I have to say also that the mother does not have a right. It's not her right to say to her son, marry this woman that he does not want to marry. She doesn't have that right. Because you know your mother will die. Your mother does not have to live with that woman. Your mother does not have to in the nighttime go in that room alone with the woman. That's not your mother doing that. That's you. So this is not the right of the mother. Although the son should respect his mother and listen to her advice.

It's very important actually. Although this is not my topic. And I think Abu Alia, he already covered this. I didn't listen to all of his talk. So maybe he covered it already. And you should listen to his talk on that. But it's very important for us to understand that the son has certain rights that are his rights. It doesn't mean the mother can order him to do everything. But in those other things, like helping her and serving her, he should do everything that he can. And this is what it means. And Allah knows best. By paradise lies at the feet of the mother.